# How can I say goodbye?



## GrandmaLiz (Dec 31, 2012)

My beautiful Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Bob, died unexpectedly a couple of weeks ago when I was on holiday. 

I posted a few months ago about canine epliepsy which both Bob and his litter brother Bing suffer(ed) from. 

I love Bing but Bob's loss leaves such a huge hole in my life and I feel so bad because I wasn't there at the end. He was only 7 and a half and suddenly developed multiple organ failure probably brought on by his medication and increased seizures. 

Bob and Bing were inseparable, thankfully Bing seems to be adjusting well to life without his companion since birth. I know I must now concentrate my love and attention on Bing and his happy, waggy tail certainly helps but there is still such a void in my heart.

I am relieved that his end was swift, within 24 hours of being 'off' his food, and that it wasn't repeated seizures but I just don't know how to say goodbye.


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## Lurker 2 (Sep 2, 2011)

So sorry for you, I know it will be very hard for me when my Ringo 'goes'. One thing, at least you are not totally alone. Take Care!


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## Colour wheel (Aug 4, 2011)

My heart goes out to you. 
Try to focus on the lovely times you spent with Bob. 
The sadness and guilt you feel for not being there for him is unhelpful to dwell on.
Bing really needs you and perhaps there'll be more room for him now.


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## KnitterNatalie (Feb 20, 2011)

I am so very sorry for your loss. Know that you are not alone, and please do lavish your love for both puppies on Bing...while he may seem to have adjusted, without a doubt he is also grieving. God bless!


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## Janpeonys (Jan 20, 2015)

Don't feel its good bye. Your darling is in your heart. Bing needs you and you need Bing. It's rough but you will make it. Our memories are what we treasure now.


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## jmf6406 (Dec 13, 2012)

I am sincerely sorry for your loss. Those of us who feel our fur babies are family members are always hit so hard when they cross over the Rainbow Bridge. We lost our beloved 13 year old McNab on 12/1/15. I still grieve, but the pain does lessen over time. Remember the good times and cherish the moments you have with Bing. Sending warm hugs.


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## calmdestiny (Nov 29, 2014)

When my dog past away unexpectedly, I wrote a letter to him. Just poured my heart out. It gave me some closure. I feel your grief, it will take time. 

Tancie


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## run4fittness (May 22, 2011)

So sorry. {{hugs}}


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## Takara (May 20, 2013)

It is always hard when our fur kids leave us.
Be comforted in the thought that you will meet again at Rainbow Bridge. I know that is what keeps me going.


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## Nancie E (Dec 16, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss of Bob. Not good-bye, just until we meet again.
Lennie will soon have to make the walk over the Rainbow bridge too, and I may not be able to post here about it. Just something we know is coming, and trying to maintain quality of life for as long as possible. Feel somewhat to blame as neutering may have prevented his tumors from growing....I did not know that.


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## crafterwantabe (Feb 26, 2013)

So sorry for your loss... you and Bing are there for each other...


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## woolycricket (Jan 27, 2016)

I am so sorry for your loss.


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## RustyLuvsMe (Oct 7, 2015)

So sorry for your loss. As someone else said it is rough but you will get through it. When my terrier mix Lady went to the Rainbow Bridge it took quite a while for me to get through my my grief but now I only remember the good things.


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## Beetytwird (Jan 19, 2011)

Sorry for your loss, give Bing extra hugs, time. You both will benefit. Bob will always be in your heart, maybe even sometimes in your dreams. I see some of mine that passed over 25 years ago in dreams....young,healthy and happy. If you ever get a new dog, you may see traits from Bob in it. Our newest, Onyx, has traits from 4 of our others. Sometimes she is a real ( as my grandmother would say) ring tailed tooter! Hugs to you.


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## LindaH (Feb 1, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss. My first puppy that owned me was a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel named Kayla Bear. She crossed over at 17 years old. Her heart murmur finally took her from me. I SO feel your pain! Have you thought of getting another puppy for Bing to play with? That will help you and Bing get over Bob's crossing.


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## GrandmaLiz (Dec 31, 2012)

LindaH said:


> I am so sorry for your loss. My first puppy that owned me was a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel named Kayla Bear. She crossed over at 17 years old. Her heart murmur finally took her from me. I SO feel your pain! Have you thought of getting another puppy for Bing to play with? That will help you and Bing get over Bob's crossing.


It seems like a long time since I posted this - so much has happened in the meantime. I really appreciate everyone's kind thoughts and the fact that you have taken the time to reply.

So what's happened?

First off - Bob was a beautiful boy who has left many happy memories along with the inevitable sad ones. Bing (his litter brother - also epileptic) adjusted to life without his companion since birth far better than I thought he would. I got us both a new companion in February - Candy, a Tibetan Terrier. She is beautiful and full of character and quite a handful. She tries to play with Bing but I think the medication has eroded whatever was left of his puppy play but they are 'doggy' companions for each other and he does (begrudgingly) often wag his tail when she pesters him (most of the time at least). She can never replace Bob (nor did I intend that she would/should) but she has made me laugh again.

Secondly - about 2 years ago my brother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and in January this year it was re-diagnosed as Lewy Body dementia - the same type of dementia that Robin Williams suffered from. In January his deteriorarion was like jumping off a cliff - so rapid. This time last year he could still drive and now he doesn't even know who I am. This has made the laughter that Candy has brought and the affection of both of my 'fur babies' even more important to me.

Thirdly - I'm in the process of selling 2 houses (the one I live in and one I rented out) and buying a new home near to my older daughter.

Many changes, tears and stress but if I've learned anything from these experiences (plus my sister dying of cancer in 2014) it's the importance of the people in your life - family, friends and pets.

Never take love, life and laughter for granted and tell those who matter to you that you love them as often as you can.

My best wishes for happiness and love to you all; xxx.


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## Lilyan (Dec 16, 2015)

You have been through so much heartache. I just want to thank you for sharing your wise words: "Never take love, life and laughter for granted and tell those who matter to you that you love them as often as you can."

Sending you hugs.


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## chrissyh (Jun 8, 2011)

golly you have been through the mill lately,best wishes for a happy settled future.our doggy kids sure help out in bad times.HUGS


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## doglady (Nov 12, 2013)

I feel for you as I was not present when my first dog died. I had begged for a dog for as long as I knew what they were and finally for my 16th birthday my dad aganst my mom's wishes got me a Chihuahua. She lived a full life, dying at age 12. I was with friends at a baseball game. When I got home my dog had dried and was buried under the Rose of Sharon Bush. I didn't even get to said good bye. No closure. It hurts to this day and I am 69 now, 41 years later.


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## scumbugusa (Oct 10, 2011)

I understand where you are at. On 9th May 2015, we lost our 13 year old Golden Retriever Norman. On 5th May 2016, we lost Maggie our St. Bernard age 5. On 30th May 2016, we lost Ari our German Shepherd age 10. We bought a German Shepherd puppy Abbey and she passed on 1st September 2016, she was 9 weeks old.

We saw on Craigslist a 2 year old St. Bernard that needed a home, so Bernie is with us now. Having another St. B, makes loosing Maggie just a tad bit easier. Abbey was sick from the time we got her, so I was not truly expecting to be 'keeping' her. 

Losing Ari tears me up daily. People say to remember the happy times, I do, but am sad that I can't have them again. Yes I am screwed up :-(

God Bless and take care xoxo


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## RosieS (Apr 21, 2016)

So sorry to read this thread about the loss of your dog Bob and also of your brother's condition. We had a Highland White Terrier called Scott that we lost when he was 13 and a half. Now we have an English Cocker Spaniel called Skipper who is almost 8 (healthy so far). I understand how part of your family animals are. Our daughter has a Kerry Blue Terrier called Bentley who will be 13 on Tuesday (not in good health). 
I really feel for you not only for the loss of your dog but also for the loss of the brother that you knew. My mother suffered a dementia (her condition came & went) due to her heart condition. At times she thought that I was her sister and at times she just looked puzzled. Sometimes she knew everything again. Sending you warm thoughts and good vibes hugs and love ((( <3 )))


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## Lettuceknit (Dec 22, 2012)

He will be waiting across the bridge when you cross the bridge. His ears will perk up as he hears your footsteps. He will come running as fast as his little legs will carry him to great you with kisses, kisses and more kisses! So very sad for you. My little one was murdered on Christmas Day a couple of years ago. Those of us who love animals understand the grief you are experiencing.


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## GrandmaLiz (Dec 31, 2012)

Thank you all again for your kind thoughts and for sharing your own stories with me. I know I am not alone in feeling the loss of my beautiful boy. Sadly, Bob's litter brother, Bing also died 3 months ago. I went to the shops and he was fine - I came home 90 minutes later to find he had died. He just looked asleep and so peaceful (thankfully, I could tell he had not suffered a siezure). Candy grieved for him for about two months - she wouldn't eat and howled. She is pretty much back to 'herself' now (eating OK etc.) and is a great comfort to me - her character and energy make me laugh and her cuddles are so affectionate. I know I will always miss my boys but I take comfort that they are together again, chasing each other around bushes and being looked after by my sister who was a great dog lover. It's a pity we can't inject some canine blood into some of the wicked people in the world. If we could, it would be a much better place. A dog's love is so pure and unconditional.

To all of you who have lost your 'fur babies' and companions, take comfort that you too have known and shared their love and their lives - those memories will endure forever and we are all richer to have known their love and loyalty. Wishing you all waggy tails, loving licks and warm hearts xxx.


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## scumbugusa (Oct 10, 2011)

I also was away when my Maggie passed. My daughter took her. I still can't believe shes gone. Almost like because I was not there it hasn't happened.


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## Nanamel14 (Aug 4, 2016)

So sorry ((((hugs))))


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## click click knit knit (Aug 8, 2018)

We lost our Cavalier about a year ago. She had bladder cancer and we took her to Colorado State University for treatment. Drove 40 miles on Monday to leave her off and drove on Friday to pick her up. She loved it at the hospital. She ran to the students when we arrived and I was told that she always had a lipstick kiss on her head. After radiation and chemo we had Molly for 18 months before she had blood in her urine and we decided she had gone through enough. She left us peacefully. Her face lives in a photo along with her ashes and her favorite toy on our mantle and every time we look up there is Molly looking at us. Her Cavalier companion, Gracie, missed her terribly and was very depressed so we found a Cavalier puppy who was born on the day Molly crossed the bridge. Maggie is just over 1 year old and keeps us laughing constantly. She loves her balls and plays with Gracie and is the sweetest dog ever. We will miss Molly forever but Maggie and Gracie are helping to fill the holes in our hearts and giving the love that never ends.


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## click click knit knit (Aug 8, 2018)

When our beloved Cavalier had to be euthenized (sp?) in Jan of 2018, we put a lovely close up photo of her along with her ashes and favorite toy on our mantle piece. Now when we look up, we see her looking happy and loved and have only happy memories of Molly. Don’t know if that will work for you. My greatest sympathy for you.


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## IsabelleP85 (Nov 5, 2019)

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