# Is Knitting in Company Impolite



## TinaOR (May 22, 2011)

As knitters, are we presumptious to think it is ok to craft in front of non crafters? Of course there are occasions when it would seem inappropriate (funerals, job interviews, business meetings), but in the main if you can knit and still join in whatever is going on around you then is it wrong to do it?
Yesterday it was suggested to me that to take along my knitting bag to a barbeque at a friend's house could be seen as rude and inappropriate. 
My friend is a non knitter, but she shows interest in what I do without ever having intentions to give it a go herself. She has a husband (also a non knitter) and children (non knitters). We were to eat, then sit and chat for a few hours, just generally enjoying each others company. 
I did take my knitting but restricted myself to a few rows. I still helped serve food, helped clear up, spoke to everyone there, including the little children and played with the new puppy. Do you think I was doing anything wrong when I clicked my sticks a little at one point? I think not! What do you say?


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## paljoey46 (Nov 20, 2011)

I take my knitting with me everywhere. Family and friends all know I knit so it isn't a problem for me. I'm like you. I help where needed and when it's time to sit and chat, I like to keep my hands busy. I usually have something simple to work on so that I don't interrupt conversation while I count.


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## mkbanklady (Apr 12, 2011)

TinaOR, knitting keeps me from chewing my fingernails or smoking in these settings! I always have my knitting with me just in case I have the opportunity to knit a few.....

Seems like to me that you enjoyed the whole event. Next time, work in more knitting!


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## Lil Kristie (Nov 25, 2011)

I don't think it is presumptious. A woman in my DD's church takes her crocheting everywhere with her. Even to church. When they have their first of the month meals, she crochets while eating and talking with everyone around her. She helps with the cooking, serving, cleaning up afterwards also.


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## BlueTressym (Nov 23, 2012)

I think it's just the same as any other activity, a matter of consideration for the company. If you are knitting at the expense of being a decent guest, then yes, it's rude. If, as you've described, you are socializing and helping out, then I'd say not. 

I personally take my knitting bag pretty much everywhere I go. I think it's a matter of being able to engage with the company and avoiding the appearance of focusing on your knitting at the expense of paying any attention to the people you're with. 

It's akin to the mobile phone debate. I would not consider I was being rude if my phone buzzed and I checked it when I was in company, or even replied if it was something that should be replied to rather than left for later. Spending half my time yakking into it while ignoring my companions however would be very rude.


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## Tomasina (Feb 2, 2011)

I can't imagine why anyone would think it rude.  Boggles the mind.


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## roseknit (Apr 2, 2011)

You can knit in company, it;s reading that;s a no no


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## Bunbun (Feb 13, 2013)

People used to ask :"do you mind if I smoke", why not ask if you're doubtful "do you mind if I knit/crochet while we visit"
Frankly I'd much rather see someone knit/crochet rather than TEXTING.


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## tintin63 (Apr 18, 2011)

Hi Tina, Well it's very much a personal choice really. I tend to crochet and knit mostly when I'm on my own. I like peace and quiet to do my crafts. I do take it if I am going to stay with a person say my Mum but I probably wouldn't do any crocheting or knitting at a gathering of people. I would do it on route and on the return journey as I do not drive and so it's either read or crochet. If I were to go on a picnic or say at Wimbledon etc then yes I would do my knitting or crocheting. I don't take it on bus journeys or even to the hospitals visits but I could I always have a book with me. I don't read in group company either unless it's at my Mum's or I'm sitting at home with family. But that's just me. I don't socialise much so I get to stay home and do my crocheting and knitting. It keeps me sane.

Tx


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## evesch (Apr 3, 2011)

I would think it would be much ruder to start yawning and falling asleep while visiting than knitting or crocheting. If I sit too still my body tends to think it is sleep time or I get the buzzy, twitchy legs, etc. Yes I have problems with just sitting still and listening. I tend to miss what people say when my hands are not engaged. Of course most of my friends like to see my knitting and sometimes I have made a convert to crafts. Also if I am knitting I am not trying to monopolize the conversation. yep I have a tendency to do that too. So knitting keeps me more balanced all around.


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## scumbugusa (Oct 10, 2011)

Seems like you know this friend very well to be included in the bbq, and you joined in at the party, so in this situation I would says it was ok.


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## Hurricane (May 18, 2013)

I bring my knitting almost everywhere. Everyone knows I knit, and they don't mind. Like you, I do all the other things first and try to be a good guest. The only time I don't bring it with me is for services at the Temple,funerals or weddings, and if the people we are going to be spending time with are new friends who aren't yet used to me doing this.
Usually it will at least be in the car, so if the situation warrants I can always go get it. I am careful to be sure it is a project that requires no concentration so I can fully participate in the conversation. A lot of people have told me it is fascinating to them to watch my hands as I join the discussion, and knit without looking.


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## Raybo (Mar 12, 2011)

TinaOR said:


> Yesterday it was suggested to me that to take along my knitting bag to a barbeque at a friend's house could be seen as rude and inappropriate.


Who was it that made that suggestion, and why? It's less rude than smoking, texting, yawning, or anything that takes attention away from the folks you are with. If the friend whose house you were at doesn't mind, why should anybody else? :XD:


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## Jessica-Jean (Mar 14, 2011)

roseknit said:


> You can knit in company, it's reading that's a no no


Add to the no no list: texting, answering the bedamned cell phone and conversing at full voice while still within the group!

My knitting and me go everywhere. Business meetings included. It's a part of who I am. Love me, love my knitting!:-D

No. I didn't knit at my parents' funerals, nor on the drives to/from the cemeteries. But I did plenty of knitting before and after. It's all that kept me sort of sane. If I were still a churchgoer, I'd knit during interminable sermons - for sure! ;-)


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## 17 Lola (May 16, 2011)

Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there 
as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


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## LAURA C (Jan 21, 2013)

Knitting in company is fine by me. I think the 200 text responses are rude. Is it such an emergency it can't wait an hour?


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## dlarkin (Jan 25, 2013)

Seems like no one can live without their cell phone these days1 What did they do before the phone?


Jessica-Jean said:


> Add to the no no list: texting, answering the bedamned cell phone and conversing at full voice while still within the group!
> 
> My knitting and me go everywhere. Business meetings included. It's a part of who I am. Love me, love my knitting!:-D
> 
> No. I didn't knit at my parents' funerals, nor on the drives to/from the cemeteries. But I did plenty of knitting before and after. It's all that kept me sort of sane. If I were still a churchgoer, I'd knit during interminable sermons - for sure! ;-)


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## Lostie (May 2, 2013)

I generally have something easy and small and mindless with me if I am travelling, hanging around waiting, etc. Close friends know I knit lots of the time. I couldn't knit in church, funerals etc - although I'd be happy for a knit-a-long at mine - after the serious congregation part, and out of consideration for others.
I can't get to many social occasions at the moment, but don't think I would take any knitting - unless under strict orders!


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## DonnieK (Nov 23, 2011)

I think I would try to use the common sense God gave me and ask if anyone had an objection to my knitting while we were all chatting. If no one has an objection.............Knit your heart out. But, if just one person says yes then I would not drag it out. I might not stay as long as I normally would have, but, I would not knit. I would NEVER knit or crochet in church. People may be dealing with the sermon in a very serious way and that could keep them for concentrating on what the Pastor is saying, or what a heart is saying. There are some places that are acceptable, and I don't feel that church is one of those places. I take my knitting to my doctors because there is always long waits at times and I tend to get anxious if I have to wait too long unless I am attending to my knitting.


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## gagesmom (Oct 14, 2011)

paljoey46 said:


> I take my knitting with me everywhere. Family and friends all know I knit so it isn't a problem for me. I'm like you. I help where needed and when it's time to sit and chat, I like to keep my hands busy. I usually have something simple to work on so that I don't interrupt conversation while I count.


Ditto!!!!


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## 17 Lola (May 16, 2011)

If someone knitted during a business meeting, I would fire them. That in my opinion, shows you have no respect for your job and your boss. I think there are times when you need to put your needles down.


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## Joyp (Feb 4, 2012)

I'm with you: I find people who can't let go of their cell phones the most rude of all. We do not want to hear the most intimate of your conversations in any group or in public! That's what I want to tell people. I have a friend who sits at my dinner table with her cell in her lap so that she needn't miss one call or txt....it drives me mad.
I also commute on the train and cell phone conversations of a private nature are something I hear quite often. Alternatively if someone is knitting I just find it fascinating to check out what their project is and it can lead to wonderful conversations. So knitting not rude....phones, YES rude....


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## mavisb (Apr 18, 2011)

I too take my knitting/crocheting with me everywhere I go. If people know you very well then they wouldn't think any differently of you.

I think a mobile is definitely a no no. I was at a petrol (gas) station whilst being served the attendant was talking on the phone and I asked if I could be served by someone who could give me their full attention. The attendant said it was a business call, and I told her in that case whoever it was could wait until she finished serving or ring that person back. I know it was a social call by what she was saying, I have never gone back to that service (gas) station.

By the same standard, I tell whoever phone me whilst I am being served to hold on or I would phone them back and apologise to the person serving me.

I haven't been brave enough to take my knitting to my business meeting, even though I fall asleep in them. boring, nothing really to do with me. I would love to take my knitting. I might ask the lab manager what she thinks. I can concentrate and knit at the same time.


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## emuears (Oct 13, 2012)

Keep on knitting but only if you don't have to read a pattern, who would complain you sound like you did your share at the bbq. If in doubt ask and I'm sure the answer would be go ahead.


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## sheila kay (Jan 2, 2013)

if your friend is ok with it then you do not have a problem. I take mine out with me also and am sure that I would be told if someone did not like it.

People who do complain, should have a look around and see how many are on their 'phones, either talking or sending text, now to me that is ignorant.


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## pinkladydew (Oct 21, 2011)

I think its fine! At the tale end of the day , everyone sitting about talking ...the men about lawn mowing and fishing, the women talking recipes, and laundry stains...ya know whatever...I think its perfectly fine to sit with your knitting as long as your still part of the conversation!


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## cydneyjo (Aug 5, 2011)

roseknit said:


> You can knit in company, it;s reading that;s a no no


Or sleepinghttp://www.knittingparadise.com/compose_reply.jsp?topicnum=183203&postnum=3578223#


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## cydneyjo (Aug 5, 2011)

roseknit said:


> You can knit in company, it;s reading that;s a no no


Ooops, I tried to put on a cute emoticon. Obviously that's something I don't know how to do.


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## JeanBee (Jul 8, 2013)

If I don't take my knitting with me to meetings, my friends ask if I am OK, or are my hands sore. Some of my friends are non-knitters and they are usually the first to comment on my absence of knitting.


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## karenwhipple (Sep 6, 2012)

Sorry, I have to disagree with most of the comments .If I was invited to a social event I would not bring my knitting. The purpose of the activity is to socialize with people. Knitting at these events sends a message that your interest is not there. I do find it rude. I feel the same with people who pop out their cell phone every few minutes .Even prior to the invention of cell phones,I would not answer my phone if I had guest over.When I stay over for a few days at my daughter's ,sister or sister in law, I will knit when we are all sitting down watching TV for the evening. At this point people are pretty much on their own to do as they wish,knit ,read ,watch tv, etc...


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## lynnlassiter (Jun 30, 2011)

knit on! i take my knitting almost everywhere!


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## greythounds (Aug 26, 2011)

I'm with Jessica-Jean. Put the blank phone on silent when you are in a social situation. Excuse yourself if you are so important and addicted to being connected with everyone or when you receive a true emergency call. I work in the library and we have signs posted everywhere.CELL PHONES MUST BE TURNED OFF. Most people ignore this and we have ringtones heard all the time. To top it off these rude people go ahead and have their conversation at the computer banks sitting two feet from the person beside them, across from them and behind them. I hustle over and tell them they must turn the phone off or go to the lobby to take it.They look at me as if I have some nerve.


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## helenna (Mar 21, 2012)

How's this then. My mum used to knit in the cinema years ago. 
If she didn't have her knitting she would fall asleep. This is how we all had our school jumpers knitted. You couldn't hear any clicking of the needles as she liked the plastic ones.


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## susan heierman (Sep 13, 2012)

Like so many others here, my knitting goes where I go. Just based on the fact that you asked this question, you are a polite and astute person. At a BBQ, where it's a more informal setting, definitely. At a gathering that is more formal, of course not. Judging by your question, you are not likely to offend anyone. You know what's rude or not. You sound like a nice person. You can bring your knitting to my house any day! However, if I am the hostess, I will be insanely jealous!!!


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## Marylou12 (Dec 11, 2011)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


I agree.
You were invited there to be with the guests and socialize, not sit somewhere and ignore all and knit.
I tried it once and firmly got told about it, so never again!


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## cydneyjo (Aug 5, 2011)

I never bring something that requires close attention. I have KIP projects that I bring and home projects that are more complicated. But I can't sit and do nothing. I just don't knit when talking to parents about their children (at work).


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## justcrafty (Jun 30, 2012)

i think that knitting is okay but reading is rude as then you are not listening. where as knitting you are still able to listen .What is worse than both is someone you are talking too wearing head phones and listening to music.


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## pengwensgranny (Aug 3, 2011)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


I agree with this. I don't think it is at all appropriate to knit in company. Any company. I would be offended if someone did it to me. When visiting family is slightly different.

I also think that answering a mobile phone is rude. No call is so important that it has to be replied to instantly.
What did we do before they were invented.


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## TeeneeBee (Jun 14, 2013)

Marylou12 said:


> I agree.
> You were invited there to be with the guests and socialize, not sit somewhere and ignore all and knit.
> I tried it once and firmly got told about it, so never again!


It needn't be a case of ignoring anyone, just take something easy and repetitive.

I think that it's a great idea, especially when children and young (and maybe not so) people are around so they have a chance to learn how things are made and you may spark the interest of a future craftsperson. If anyone has a problem they can let you know and justify their complaints too. Knit on!


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## Andaia (Aug 5, 2012)

One thing to consider, even if you can knit and pay attention to the conversation, is that some people may interpret your bringing your knitting as implying that socializing with them is too boring to you unless you have something to occupy you. It's not that you are distracted or not paying attention, it's the appearance of needing something else to entertain you. For that reason, I usually avoid taking my knitting along unless I'm certain I'm with people who will understand.


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## PamieSue1 (Feb 14, 2011)

karenwhippie, I agree with you. I remember when I did not knit and went to a friend's home. Another guest sat on the couch and knit away, rarely looking up or engaging in conversation. I thought it extremely rude. I will knit when sitting and watching TV at my parents house, but would not do it if invited to a friend's house for a visit. I find it rude for people not to make some type of visual contact during a conversation. I agree, the texting and constantly checking a cell phone drives me crazy! My sister is constantly checking hers and consequently, I don't enjoy her company much. Makes me want to just get up in the middle of her conversation when she is talking to me and just walk out of the room as if distracted by something and make her wonder why I just left the scene. Most people know I knit, but I'm sure most of them would be offended if I did it when we were supposed to be spending time together socializing. I would never knit in church.


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## PamieSue1 (Feb 14, 2011)

Oh, and there have been plenty of times I would have loved to break out the knitting during a business meeting, especially in a large dimly lit auditorium, but was afraid someone would see me and report it, even if jokingly. So, I would not do it during a meeting. You are on their time during the meeting. I do carry it to work and knit on my 2 breaks a day, however. That is "my time". LOL


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## JAMEYALSO (Nov 28, 2012)

I took my knitting to a BBQ at my daughter's house. her in laws were there discussing their health problems and my son in law asked if I was knitting because i was bored. Believe me ---- I was!!!!!!


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## Ripper knitter (Dec 3, 2012)

What kind of friends do you have that you need something to do while visiting them?


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## mkbanklady (Apr 12, 2011)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


Your opinion suggests to me that you may be a little uptight and probably have to use needles three sizes larger than suggested to get correct gauge!


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## Nancyn (Mar 23, 2013)

I think it depends on the people you are with. Some would get insulted, others not. You need to make that distinction as they are your friends. I wouldn't bring mine to a social event because I would only mess up my knitting and then have to frog it all later!


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## JAMEYALSO (Nov 28, 2012)

you are so right.


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## joycevv (Oct 13, 2011)

I can see we are divided on this issue. I think it very much depends on the social situation whether or not knitting is appropriate. Something very informal and relaxed like a BBQ or picnic, depending on your hosts, could be perfectly ok. For myself, I am usually too busy catching up with old friends and making new ones to even consider knitting.


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## 17 Lola (May 16, 2011)

I am not uptight at all, but was raised to respect people. And for the gauge remark....I never have to changed needle size....I knit to the gauge given in a pattern.


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## gmaison (May 24, 2012)

I agree..


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## tamarque (Jan 21, 2011)

I went to a Juneteenth event held in a church last month. Left my knitting at home but sure enough next to me were 2 women knitting away.

I have knit my way thru all kinds of meetings. I met one man at a nominating convention last month who knew me as the woman who knit at Town Board meetings. I attended as a member of a town commission that I sit on and will also knit at commission meetings. No one has complained to me.

Sometimes people are distracted because of their curiosity which they won't deal with--like asking what you are making or can they see what you are doing. That is their problem. Of course if you pick up on this, why not be assertive and ask if they would like to see the project

Then there are those who are very self-righteous and like to have everything under their control. Forget them and their pathology.


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## gmaison (May 24, 2012)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


sorry...this is what I AGREE with..


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## AnDee (Jan 30, 2012)

I take mine along to family functions and work after everything is done. If I try to just sit and not do anything I am reaching for the cookies or whatever is being served after dinner. If you can take your knitting to a baseball game and it is called "stich & pitch"? I saw a bumper sticker that said "Iknit so I don't kill people"; a little drastic but it beats the electronic stuff. My brother in law checked his emails at the table during the bbq and played Words. His mother didn't say a word.


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## gmfair (Aug 20, 2011)

If I did not take my knitting to Doctor appointments I would be a "cot case"
My appointments with my cardiologist have been known to be as long as five hours waiting..............so my knitting keeps me calm, calm,calm.........if you are late for your appointment they can charge you.........but they can take as long as they like and you have to put up with it.................GOD BLESS KNITTING..........


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## TeeneeBee (Jun 14, 2013)

There is a long tradition of knitting in social groups. Social - as in sitting around together and chatting while knitting. My grandmother was one who thought it incorrect to sit and do nothing as 'the devil makes work for idle hands' and often girls would be expected to knit while sitting socialising. 

If my undivided attention were required, that would be one thing, but for the most part, socialising should be relaxed and comfortable and that means being yourself. 

I really do think it's very important that youngsters can see people engaging in crafts.


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## past (Apr 3, 2011)

My knitting goes with me. There are only a couple places I won't knit such as church, at a wake or funeral, or while eating a meal. I am careful to make sure that when I take knitting into the public or when visiting with friends that I only take what I call no brainer projects. Something only in stocking stitch and definitely no lace patterns. I want to keep my fingers busy, but be able to participate in the conversation without my knitting being a distraction.
I knit while playing BINGO, while watching a movie or show, visiting with friends, and definitely waiting in a doctors office. I have never had anyone tell me they didn't want me to knit, but if they did I would quietly put my knitting aside because the last thing I would want is for any friend (old or new) to feel that I'm putting my knitting over spending time with them.


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## Gweneth 1946 (May 20, 2012)

Only the "ME" generation and also those who "always" want your full attention do not like people knitting while in their company, but all knitters understand.


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## Rosieredhair (Apr 27, 2013)

Interesting. I think it depends on the occasion. I wouldn't take knitting to a formal occasion and I wouldn't take something complicated which required concentration to an informal occasion because i would want to chat and join in. But I think it's fine if the occasion is informal and the knitting is straight forward.


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## Patwig (Jul 8, 2013)

I agree with the other answers. I would never knit in church but at an occasion where chatting goes on,I definitely want to keep my hands busy. I am reading"No Idle Hands The Social History of American Knitting". Girls were taught to card spin and knit at an early age and expected to help produce clothing for the family. In those days,women never had empty hands!


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## 15540 (Apr 6, 2011)

If your knitting requires you to look at it and not your company, then it's a no no. Very similar to texting. All your attention is on what you are doing. So pick and choose your projects accordingly.


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## karenwhipple (Sep 6, 2012)

I agree, If we cannot let go of our knitting in a none knitting event,I guess we are not much better than those who cannot let go of their cell phones. I am sure that we could be perceived that way. It does not matter what you are doing ,knitting ,crochet ,texting, in my opinion it is disrespectful to the host. Should I ask if I may knit,as was mentioned by others,I am sure that the people would be too polite to say no, even if they felt it not to be appropriate.


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## dogstocking (Feb 25, 2013)

Knitting vs. texting or checking your mobile seventy-three times? (Or even twice?) Are you kidding?! Go for it.


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## gailshirley (Sep 8, 2012)

not at all. i always take my knitting and have done for many years ,i can knit and talk ..i usually take something that i can knit without thinking too much ie a complicated pattern.no one has ever said anything other than to ask what i am knitting now,or to be cheeky and ask me to knit for them.


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## sten66 (May 4, 2011)

I think knitting at a friend's BBQ is fine, especially since you helped out. I wouldn't knit at a party in a hall or restaurant, or a formal dinner in someone's home. I would knit at a diner or pub with my husband and our friends.


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## jpfries (Jan 14, 2013)

yes, even tho I am an avid knitter, and take along my knitting in the car, and various places I may just want to help me pass time, I do feel when we are in the presence of good company, or at a function, surely we can put our needles down and enjoy their company, Otherwise it really is no more polite than texting while in company.


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## pemstags (Aug 19, 2012)

Cannot xsee any wrong in it, if your friends know you like to knit and it was purely a get togther to me no problem
Pat


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## Bitsee (Mar 11, 2013)

Look back in history. Pretty much from day one when women were constructing clothing or other things they did it in groups. All kinds of needle work, knitting, crocheting, cross stitch, hand sewing, etc. were taken along when women were visiting. It was acceptable to do some kind of small projects at social functions. I always have my knitting with me. I keep a small project in my car at all times and like so many of you, it is a project I don't have to pay much attention to so I can join in with everyone in attendance. I don't carry it with me into the function, but if things are winding down to the point where everyone is just chatting, then I can get my knitting out of my car. Sometimes when I take out my knitting, it can fill a lull in the conversation as people take an interest in what I am doing. I would say, if you are comfortable when and where you knit then do so.


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## Genia (Sep 8, 2011)

I take my hand work to all my doctor appointments. It beats waiting and having your blood pressure rise. It's suprising how much can be done without getting hyper
if the doctor is running late.


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## jonibee (Nov 3, 2011)

It suppose to be a social time..talking to each other..I would feel offended if my friend came and pulled out her knitting..there's a time and a place for everything..sometimes we have to put aside things we consider to be important so it doesn't come off as being uninterested or rude. Or leave it in your car and when things get at a stand still ask if they would be offended if you knitted. Plus you run the risk of getting it soiled by others should something be spilt or dropped on the ground or floor..plus it's an attractive things to grab should there be pets about...


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## Ma Kitty (Mar 15, 2013)

I take knitting on a plane so I have something to do while waiting and travelling. If I were going to a friends and it was going to be a long evening or day I'd take knitting as it passes the time when the hostess can't always be with you. I think it makes them happy to see you're occupied. I don't take knitting to church but sometimes wish I had! I would think a smoker is more tacky because they're always going out to smoke. At least a knitter is always present. I think you have to read each situation and go with what you think is right.


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## mwilde818 (Feb 9, 2013)

I bring my knitting with me when visiting; however, I too participate in the conversation, help with serving, clean-up, etc. I wish I could bring my knitting to chuch as I find it easier to focus when I'm knitting and find it difficult to just sit and "do nothing".


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## La la patti (Apr 3, 2011)

I took my knitting with me to my nieces graduation party yesterday . It was a 3 hour drive to get there . My DH did the driving ...thankfully. I found that I was knitted out by the time I got there. The sock on the needles did come out to be shown off but I didn't work on it. Too many people to visit with . If it were just a few adults and we were sitting quietly, I probably would have sat ,talked and worked on my sock. I saved it for the 3 hour drive home, thou I fell asleep half way home.


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## mperrone (Mar 14, 2013)

I agree with 1318 -- my friends are worth my full attention. 

Marianne :~)


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## JeanBlain (Mar 21, 2013)

I took my knitting with me when we went up north to my brothers for the 4th. I have no problem knitting around people at gatherings. Most people are interested in what I am working on. As long as you are still interacting with everyone, don't worry and take your work with you. If it is a formal gathering, that may be a different story, however.


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## courier770 (Jan 29, 2011)

Like all the other activities mentioned, (texting, cell phone use, I-pod/pad use etc.) I think it depends on the event.

Stepping off to the side to take a phone call at a bbq, isn't rude, doing so in the middle of a wedding would be though. Most people who know us knitters/crocheters well, know how comfortable we are with needles/hooks and yarn in our hands. That said, I think that knitting during "formal" events would be a bit discourteous.


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## Andaia (Aug 5, 2012)

I've already commented but I do want to add something: the comparison of knitting to checking smartphones is interesting because one is "old-fashioned" and one is "newfangled". I think many of us are older and therefore more likely to feel offended by people checking their phones than knitting. However, this is a value judgment that I find to be arbitrary--both are activities that people may see others as unnecessarily prioritizing over giving their full attention to the primary activity at hand. If this is waiting at the doctor's office, go for it, but just because YOU feel it's important to finish your sock doesn't mean it's going to look adorable to everyone watching you and wondering how bored you are with their conversation.


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## NellieKnitter (Sep 10, 2012)

1318 said:


> If someone knitted during a business meeting, I would fire them. That in my opinion, shows you have no respect for your job and your boss. I think there are times when you need to put your needles down.


There is are lots of different types of business meetings other than job business meetings, such as club/organization meetings. If it is a large group meeting and you are required to listen only--not an active participate, I see nothing wrong with knitting. I see women knitting at meetings with such speed and skill, it is a distraction for me because I watch their hands in amazement. LOL, but that is my problem.


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## TeeneeBee (Jun 14, 2013)

It's not just an arbitrary value judgement as knitting does not require the social side of your brain to be engaged with it whereas texting and other phone related things do. It is perfectly possible to be fully engaged socially and also knitting, and previous generations of women not only did it, but were expected to do it.


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## desireeross (Jun 2, 2013)

I think checking your mail and messaging on your phone is far more rude than knitting in company. I won't knit a pattern where I can't look someone in the eye when they talk to me. I take my knitting with me but seldom actually find myself knitting more than a couple of rows.


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## PauletteB. (Feb 7, 2012)

I carry my knitting everywhere. We had a rehearsal for my grandson's wedding. While we were just sitting around waiting to get started, I worked on my knitting while talking to people.


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## KnitterNatalie (Feb 20, 2011)

paljoey46 said:


> I take my knitting with me everywhere. Family and friends all know I knit so it isn't a problem for me. I'm like you. I help where needed and when it's time to sit and chat, I like to keep my hands busy. I usually have something simple to work on so that I don't interrupt conversation while I count.


Ditto!


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## Ronie (Jan 21, 2011)

it all depends on the funtion and the people there.. if it were a problem you would get the vibes right away.. if it were your spouse that said you shouldn't take it then it was a problem and it should of been left home for the few hours you were gone.. If no one minded and seemed interested then by all means go for it... if your spouse suports your habbit then go for it... you have to go with your gut on these things. I would not take my knitting to a social event. I would socialize and if it got to the point where I wasn't having any fun then I would go home and do what I want to do.. life is too short for hours spent unhappy or uncomfortable.. my hubby feels the same as I do so its usually easy to get him to go home


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


I actually agree with this .


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## NellieKnitter (Sep 10, 2012)

I take my knitting to holiday and other family functions and overnight visits where there is lots of down time--watching TV together and talking, playing games, working puzzles where everyone is relaxing and doing their own thing. I see absolutely nothing wrong with knitting during these occasions.


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## Peg I M4 (Apr 6, 2012)

I used to think knitting in public was rude until the cell phones came out. If the noise and lack of attention from using them isn't considered rude then quietly knitting certainly should not be.


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## TinaBW (Nov 20, 2012)

Tina, I don't think it was rude at all. If I waited to knit until I was alone I would never get a stitch in.


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## TeeneeBee (Jun 14, 2013)

NellieKnitter said:


> I take my knitting to holiday and other family functions and overnight visits where there is lots of down time--watching TV together and talking, playing games, working puzzles where everyone is relaxing and doing their own thing. I see absolutely nothing wrong with knitting during these occasions.


 :thumbup:


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## Anita1955 (Jan 6, 2013)

I think this is like many things - context is the issue. For example, I belong to a book club that meets monthly at a local restaurant and three of eight of us typically bring our knitting. We are fully able to discuss the book while knitting. On the other hand, my husband and I belong. To a dinner party group and I would never consider bringing my knitting. Judge considering the company...


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## Strickliese (Jan 6, 2012)

I think it is fine to take your knitting to social functions.


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## aliciawake (Jun 21, 2011)

Knitting is a great way to start conversations too. I've found that lots of people have wanted to learn how to knit but didnt know anyone who did. Also got requests for pieces from people who watched me work on others. It also keeps me from getting involved in other conversations where I know I would just say something that would get me in trouble.


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## Tessa28 (Sep 26, 2011)

I go to a social club, where I am Secretary, I sit with my friends who are mainly from one family group. They love going on family holidays and discuss them before and after, sometimes that is the only conversation of the evening, passports, currency, how much luggage allowance, how to get to the airport. I knit and nobody minds, if they did I would remind them that not all of us are going on the holiday and while we don't mind them talking about it as sometimes it gets quite funny, it can get pretty boring. One of the ladies is also a knitter who has come back to the craft and she sometimes needs help which I am more than happy to give. Members of the Social Club often ask what I am knitting and if I will knit something for them. I have knit on trains, coaches, in airports, as Jessica-Jean says its part of who I am. Tessa28


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## flohel (Jan 24, 2011)

I tend to agree with 1318. When visiting friends or a function knitting. reading or texting in my opinion is rude but that is only me.


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## Ann DeGray (May 11, 2011)

If I'm sittin' I'm knittin'!


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## Meyow (May 2, 2013)

I've always tended not to take knitting with me. You know what's the absolute worst? When you don't take yours and someone else is there knitting! Happened to me a couple times and I thought I would climb the walls.


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## ra1nb0z (Mar 5, 2011)

My late husband once criticized me for crocheting during a committee meeting. My answer to him was, "You guys smoked during the meeting and at the end all you had was a dirty ashtray you had to clean. I crocheted & had a few more granny squares done & I contributed a lot more to the discussions during the meeting than you did!"


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## knitnanny (Feb 28, 2012)

I only knit when I am with a knitting friend. I would not take it to a social function. That's just my feeling but others may think differently. I do not make judgements with people so I would not be offended if someone was knitting!


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## vjh1530 (Oct 8, 2011)

I like to take my knitting with me most places because I hate to sit idle. As for social occasions, I agree that I would ask the hostess if she minded before I pulled it out. I would not knit during a sermon, for example, but might knit while sitting there waiting. I find it is a great way to socialize, because people who might be too shy or whatever to just start talking to me, will be comfortable asking me what I am making, and then a nice conversation will start. At that point, though I would probably stop and talk. I have had the entire group in a doctor's waiting room start talking with each other after one person starting questioning me about my project. I think that is nice!

Also, I have a very painful back and neck condition and fibromyalgia. I found that while I was sitting and talking to people the pain would get much worse, sometimes to the point I would have to excuse myself and find a place to lay down if possible, or just sit hunched up in pain. I realized that when I conversed with someone I would tend to turn my body towards them and nod my head while they were speaking. People would think I was crazy if I sat rigidly facing forward and not moving my body or head while we spoke, lol! But I found that when I knit I had to keep facing forward and keep my head still. Now (when in an appropriate situation) I tell whoever I will be talking to why I prefer to knit while talking and have never had anyone complain. I knit something simple like a washcloth or the stockingette portion of sweater, etc, where I don't need to pay strict attention to the pattern. Plus the knitting helps keep my mind off the pain I always have when I have to sit in a regular chair, or during lulls in the conversation. So now I can usually stay in conversations much longer than I previously had been able. That's a win to me :-D


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## Abi_marsden (Aug 5, 2012)

I wouldn't do any of my crafts in public,I find it very rude when friends text or talk long on the phone in my company.they want your company not your needles surely you can leave your craft for a while.i


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## AnjiCat (Dec 6, 2011)

I don't think it is quite so black or white.

If it is a formal social occasion such as a wedding ceremony where your attention is supposed to be exclusively on the proceedings then I would not be knitting, though I would probably have an easy project in my bag if there were to be a less formal party afterward.

If it is a relaxed get together, I would take my knitting as it does not stop me socialising. I can talk, think and contribute just as well with needles on the go as without but I would not take a large item or one that is complex or that would stop me being social.

In fact, sometimes it is a social lubricant. Recently at my friends birthday party, my having my knitting out generated a wonderful long lasting conversation between myself, his mother and his girlfriends grandmother plus assorted other people. Sometimes I have taken my knitting and have been so engrossed by whatever is going on that it has never made it out of my bag or it has ended up just being in my lap without growing a stitch. Fortunately none of my friends are of the ilk that would see me knitting as a sign that I thought the occasion was boring.

So I suppose that the long and the short of it is, it depends on what type of event, what type of project and what type of friends you have :mrgreen:


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## Cocoa (Jul 23, 2012)

I think it totally depends on the occasion and individuals present. There is no one clear cut answer for all situations.


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## 17 Lola (May 16, 2011)

I also think when you knit at these functions, you are putting the attention on yourself.


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## jadancey (May 13, 2011)

I agree with karenwhipple completely, could not say it any better. If you have to take your knitting to an invited social event, maybe you should stay home.


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## cafeknitter (Apr 2, 2013)

Agreed! 
I think it is a personal decision. What's your comfort level? Car rides are the best with needles in tow!


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## barbdpayne (Jan 24, 2011)

I think it depends on the social situation. If you can still participate in conversation and social activity, then why not knit. If it is a cocktail party or event at which the expectation is that you are to meander around and mingle or play games or such, then no, knitting is not appropriate. It would make you seem distant and uninterested and you probably wouldn't get invited again. So take it along, then gauge whether or not it would be okay.


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## Colonial Cat (Mar 4, 2013)

I do lap robes or the like and I can do those and talk it doesn't stop me from enjoying my self and still get some knitting or crocheting done , what I do is plain and simple not much I need to concentrate on to do it. I have knit or crocheted for so long I can do most of it with out looking at it a lot it is all plain and simple no patterns involved that I need to concentrate on. Beside it keeps me from getting bored at times also. Many are amazed I can do so much of it with out looking at it I do it by feel after all these years , I learned to knit at age 12 y or so now 73y one learns to use feel of object when knitting or crocheting or I do anyway it's not fancy work simple no pattern just a certain width and length .But i have done sweaters etc like that also never had any comments other than how do you knit and or crochet with out looking at it all the time practice and many years of raising 4 children and knitting or crocheting also helps.


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## jpfries (Jan 14, 2013)

you are so right, it is a very personal choice. I knit traveling, in doctors offices, anytime I am waiting or just plain "bored". Which is why I do not knit in company unless it is just a casual time with A family member or A friend. I feel it makes it look as if I am bored with their company. I have been in a group where a lady knit all evening. In my view I felt as if she could not spare the time to spend with the rest of us. Yes, we did ask her what she was making in a n attempt to draw her into the fun the rest of us were having. Sorry, that is my view.


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## beejay (May 27, 2011)

I take my knitting nearly everyplace I go. I make sure it is something simple and I don't look at my knitting when I knit so I am still looking at people when I'm talking to them. The only time I look at my knitting is if it is a complicated pattern that I am just getting used to so I wouldn't take that.


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## aliciawake (Jun 21, 2011)

jadancey said:


> I agree with karenwhipple completely, could not say it any better. If you have to take your knitting to an invited social event, maybe you should stay home.


what a perfect excuse for staying home! who knew my passion for knitting would give me an escape route from one of the most dreaded obligations ever....


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## Oldesttm (Jul 4, 2012)

Amen! (And as I still go to church, I only knit on prayer shawls during church...let them try to say anything.)


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## luv (Feb 19, 2012)

Bunbun said:


> People used to ask :"do you mind if I smoke", why not ask if you're doubtful "do you mind if I knit/crochet while we visit"
> Frankly I'd much rather see someone knit/crochet rather than TEXTING.


 :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## knittingdragon (Jun 15, 2012)

You say in your post that your friend knows you knit and takes an interest in what you are doing. Seems to me that she has no problem with you knitting so why should anyone else. You were not being anti-social or ignoring the cinversation and you got involved in other activities. If the people holding the bbq didn't want you to knit they would have done one of two things -
1. Not invited you or
2. Asked you not to bring your knitting.

I say go for it!


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## MaineSqueeze (Feb 23, 2012)

I think if you are concerned, the thing to do would be when asked to attend any gathering...ask the host/hostess if they would mind if you knit, but I would also explain how it's important to me, or that I was making something for a gift, charity, etc. and that it wouldn't keep me from socializing or helping.


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## Lily Jamjar (Dec 31, 2012)

I would say the person who suggested to you that it was rude, was him/herself the one being rude.


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## hoodedmaiden60 (Mar 16, 2011)

Nawww im deaf and when im in a social situatation wich im rarely in anyways i knit..i cant hear the conversation and i dont just wanna sit there and pick my nose,, so i knit...so knit on!


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## barbdpayne (Jan 24, 2011)

I don't think the person who suggested knitting at a social function was rude was being rude. The person who posted this asked for opinions and one was given. I think there are situations where knitting at certain functions could be rude. You have to use common sense, know who you will be with, know what the expectations are for your behavior and then judge for yourself. Knitting at doctor's waiting rooms, on planes, at a cafe or while in line somewhere is far different than knitting at a party where you are expected to be socializing and contributing to the ambience--and sometimes it is okay to knit there--just be mindful so that you don't insult your hosts.


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## gma11331 (Oct 18, 2011)

I think it totally depends on the situation and how well you know the people involved. I take my knitting to family visits but wouldn't take it to a more formal occasion.


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## Meyow (May 2, 2013)

I admire your choice of activity!!!


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## Meyow (May 2, 2013)

I admire your choice!


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## WillyNIlly (Mar 4, 2013)

I think NOT!! I find that my friends, non-knitters, are alright with my "clicking along," since, I, too, don't knit until everything else is done, whatever "everything else" entails. I take my knitting to the movies, even, as sitting and waiting for the features to begin can be a great time to get in a few extra stitches/rows. As long as I'm not driving, friends have no trouble with my knitting on "road trips," (even if it's just to the grocery store), and neither does my husband.


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## 17 Lola (May 16, 2011)

barbdpayne said:


> I think it depends on the social situation. If you can still participate in conversation and social activity, then why not knit. If it is a cocktail party or event at which the expectation is that you are to meander around and mingle or play games or such, then no, knitting is not appropriate. It would make you seem distant and uninterested and you probably wouldn't get invited again. So take it along, then gauge whether or not it would be okay.


You said uninterested. I think that would apply to any event.


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## misellen (Mar 8, 2013)

mkbanklady said:


> Your opinion suggests to me that you may be a little uptight and probably have to use needles three sizes larger than suggested to get correct gauge!


 :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## toknitornot (Aug 1, 2012)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


Well, there you go. This person and a few others would be offended. I think some people feel they don't have your FULL and UNDEVIDED ATTENTION if you aren't staring at them. I have a brother who has to lock eyes with the person he is speaking to. If someone or something comes between, he stops talking. I personally knit rather than smoke, something that helped me quit. If I am an active part of the conversation in a group, I put my knitting down. But sometimes, I just blend into the wallpaper, take the conversation in, and knit away.


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## 17 Lola (May 16, 2011)

toknitornot said:


> Well, there you go. This person and a few others would be offended. I think some people feel they don't have your FULL and UNDEVIDED ATTENTION if you aren't staring at them. I have a brother who has to lock eyes with the person he is speaking to. If someone or something comes between, he stops talking. I personally knit rather than smoke, something that helped me quit. If I am an active part of the conversation in a group, I put my knitting down. But sometimes, I just blend into the wallpaper, take the conversation in, and knit away.


I would not be offended if someone knits, I just feel it is rude to the hostess and other guest. If you have the need to knit all the time, you must lead a very boring life.


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## Hazel Blumberg - McKee (Sep 9, 2011)

I don't think you did anything wrong. As long as it's not a pattern you have to concentrate on to the exclusion of all else, I think it's fine to knit while chatting with friends.

Hazel


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

Abi_marsden said:


> I wouldn't do any of my crafts in public,I find it very rude when friends text or talk long on the phone in my company.they want your company not your needles surely you can leave your craft for a while.i


Agreed


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## misellen (Mar 8, 2013)

Ann DeGray said:


> If I'm sittin' I'm knittin'!


 :thumbup:  :thumbup:


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## arwenian (Aug 15, 2011)

I'd much rather have someone knitting where I know you can still listen and speak and basically be a part of the conversation, as opposed to my daughter who keeps her head in her phone reading e-mails, texting, Facebook and Twitter the whole time. As far as I can tell, she is only present in body. My pet peeve.
As for me, I have no reservations about knitting unless I'm with people who don't know me well. I used to knit at my children's activities even when held in churches. Never heard any criticism even from my own darlings.


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

toknitornot said:


> Well, there you go. This person and a few others would be offended. I think some people feel they don't have your FULL and UNDEVIDED ATTENTION if you aren't staring at them. I have a brother who has to lock eyes with the person he is speaking to. If someone or something comes between, he stops talking. I personally knit rather than smoke, something that helped me quit. If I am an active part of the conversation in a group, I put my knitting down. But sometimes, I just blend into the wallpaper, take the conversation in, and knit away.


I actually like having conversations, so yes I would expect undivided attention. I find that when someone is distracted with doing something else while we chat, I always have to repeat myself and that becomes annoying.

Obviously if its a social knitting group etc the banter is usually very light hearted as no one can concentrate on anything else as such.

As a child, our family used to visit us every Sunday afternoon. My one aunt was constantly knitting - she used to knit intricate cabled sweaters for her husband and sons. This constant knitting just irked my mom (sewer not knitter) and her sisters ( knitters, crocheters and embroidery divas) as my aunt never raised her eyes during chats or her bum to help clean up for that matter. Mom and other aunts to gossip about my knitting aunt and her knitting all the time  It left an impression on me I guess.

I hate phones for the most part and can easily ignore phone calls without batting an eyelash, so cell phones for me are a curse I have to live with since I have to carry one 24/7 because of my job.


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## threekidsmom (Feb 8, 2012)

roseknit said:


> You can knit in company, it;s reading that;s a no no


I agree!


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## misellen (Mar 8, 2013)

1318 said:


> I would not be offended if someone knits, I just feel it is rude to the hostess and other guest. If you have the need to knit all the time, you must lead a very boring life.


You are so judgmental, I wonder if you have a life at all. :hunf:


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## grandmombear (Feb 2, 2013)

I'm with most: I take something to knit EVERYWHERE!! Even to conferences/meetings sitting in non conspicuous places. I have found that I retain more of what is being presented when I am knitting!! If in small group, I always ask if they mind is I knit while they talk. Most don't mind.


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## AuntKnitty (Apr 10, 2011)

I take my knitting everywhere. My friends and family are always interested, it's certainly a conversation starter everywhere else! I do knit through meetings and were I a church-goer, I would probably knit there too. Knitting seems to help my concentration as I'm not fiddling or doodling. I don't, however, take complicated patterns that require concentration or lots of counting. I have a few on-going projects that require a couple of miles of garter stitch and socks are always pretty no-brainer. 

I'm always the first up to help in the kitchen or with clean-up and I can definitely carry on a conversation while knitting!


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## toknitornot (Aug 1, 2012)

1318 said:


> I would not be offended if someone knits, I just feel it is rude to the hostess and other guest. If you have the need to knit all the time, you must lead a very boring life.


I guess I don't like to be bored, because then I start thinking about having a cigarette...not good. Upon reflection, I only take my knitting to family gatherings, where the conversation is lively and it's ok to sit back and listen. Or I take it to travel or wait for an appointment, etc.


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## pjstitches (Jan 26, 2011)

My knitting or crocheting is Always with me, especially when we head out the door for errands in the car; we are 40 miles from anywhere and, if we should happen to break down, I will NOT be without something to occupy me while I/we wait. I hate being a nervous wreck.
All of the people who have known me for any length of time expect me to have something with me for them to see and me to work on. It's just normal me.
If there is a question about a specific situation, I would ask if it would be a bother to anyone. (I was at a coin auction once in tight quarters (no pun intended) and wasn't involved in the bidding. I just sat in a chair nearby and knit. A young man came up to me later and said how fascinating it had been to watch my hands work the stitches. I believe that a female in his family knit.)

Have at it!! It can be calming for everyone. pj stitches!


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## BlueJay21 (Jan 4, 2013)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


I agree here.


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## Patricia368 (Apr 3, 2011)

I do not think it is rude to knit/crochet when there is idol time. Like someone said it keeps the hands busy, and to me knitting is not rude. Some other things I consider rude, but will not comment on that.


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## JeanBlain (Mar 21, 2013)

arwenian said:


> I'd much rather have someone knitting where I know you can still listen and speak and basically be a part of the conversation, as opposed to my daughter who keeps her head in her phone reading e-mails, texting, Facebook and Twitter the whole time. As far as I can tell, she is only present in body. My pet peeve.
> As for me, I have no reservations about knitting unless I'm with people who don't know me well. I used to knit at my children's activities even when held in churches. Never heard any criticism even from my own darlings.


I agree with you. Cell phones do come in handy, but some people make it the center of their world. I have one, but it does not get used that much. In fact, we qualified for a Safelink phone (that is completely free for low income families) and signed up for the 125 free minutes a month. We are up over 1,300 minutes right now. That's how much we use it.


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## GMADRAGON2 (Apr 20, 2011)

No more than watching television or checking your text messages or sending them. I knit when out in public and my attention is not needed to anyone/thing. However, I put it down when company comes over ... turn off my phone ... and the TV. Just call me old-fashioned, I guess.


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## NellieKnitter (Sep 10, 2012)

Anita1955 said:


> I think this is like many things - context is the issue. For example, I belong to a book club that meets monthly at a local restaurant and three of eight of us typically bring our knitting. We are fully able to discuss the book while knitting. On the other hand, my husband and I belong. To a dinner party group and I would never consider bringing my knitting. Judge considering the company...


I agree.


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## Burnstown (Jul 8, 2013)

I take my knitting everywhere and all my friends understand that. I used to knit while watching my son's hockey practices. When his friends thought it was funny it became acceptable!LOL I knit a christening shawl during a river cruise in Europe and met a lot of really interesting people who wanted to know what I was knitting. The same thing happened on a train trip. As someone said there are a few "no-nos" like funerals etc. Happy knitting.


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## vancat (Apr 9, 2011)

I agree with 1318, it IS quite rude to do something other than interact with the other guests. On a one to one basis, with a good friend, it is possibly OK, if they don't mind. Even if you can knit without concentrating on what you are doing, the perception of other people is that you are not paying attention to them, or their conversation.


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## pengwensgranny (Aug 3, 2011)

1318 said:


> I would not be offended if someone knits, I just feel it is rude to the hostess and other guest. If you have the need to knit all the time, you must lead a very boring life.


Here Here!!!!!


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## CrochetorKnit (Feb 15, 2013)

I only take knitting/crocheting to close family members homes when I visit. Also to doctors appointments and long car rides, basically anywhere where I might have to wait a long time without social interaction. Would never take it to a party, barbeque, birthday party, etc. I DO think that would be rude.


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## Norma B. (Oct 15, 2012)

TinaOR said:


> As knitters, are we presumptious to think it is ok to craft in front of non crafters? Of course there are occasions when it would seem inappropriate (funerals, job interviews, business meetings), but in the main if you can knit and still join in whatever is going on around you then is it wrong to do it?
> Yesterday it was suggested to me that to take along my knitting bag to a barbeque at a friend's house could be seen as rude and inappropriate.
> My friend is a non knitter, but she shows interest in what I do without ever having intentions to give it a go herself. She has a husband (also a non knitter) and children (non knitters). We were to eat, then sit and chat for a few hours, just generally enjoying each others company.
> I did take my knitting but restricted myself to a few rows. I still helped serve food, helped clear up, spoke to everyone there, including the little children and played with the new puppy. Do you think I was doing anything wrong when I clicked my sticks a little at one point? I think not! What do you say?


For me it's a moot question. No way I can knit and converse simultaneously. I'd either miss half of what was being said, or make dozens of mistakes in my knitting. Probably both. Guess I'm not adept enough to concentrate on two mental activities at once. Most authorities on the subject will say that the mind can only hold one thought at a time. It's certainly true with me.


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## CYFFAN (Oct 24, 2012)

I take my knitting everywhere. Sometimes I knit, sometimes I do not. I always take something small that needs little attention.


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## Crafty Lady 45 (May 3, 2013)

I take my knitting with me everywhere. If you can knit and carry on a conversation...go for it...
I still help out when needed, but if I am just going to sit there talking, I can knit at the same time.


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## 1953knitter (Mar 30, 2011)

I take my knitting with me, it is always in the car. I take it to visit my Mom, football games, friends. Like you I help with the meal and clean up, I get in on the conversation etc. No one minds and are usually interested in what I am knitting - I do stick to simple patterns so I can be involved in what is going on.


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## cherylanne (May 1, 2013)

For the most part, no. I knit in doctor's officers, on public transport and at casual functions. I would not knit at religious observances or at formal events, or at plays or in the movies. Clicking needles can be an annoyance , so I substitute plastic when watching TV with others, and especially in hospital rooms. Those who doubt the suitability of"public" knitting obviously aren't familiar with Miss Marple, an excellent example of the British/Australian/NZ knitting women I grew up with. Her manners were impeccable, and she knitted practically everywhere.


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## Ginialea (Nov 9, 2012)

If I'm knitting, I'm not eating. This is a good thing!


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## scot_belle (Feb 10, 2013)

TeeneeBee said:


> There is a long tradition of knitting in social groups. Social - as in sitting around together and chatting while knitting. My grandmother was one who thought it incorrect to sit and do nothing as 'the devil makes work for idle hands' and often girls would be expected to knit while sitting socialising.
> 
> If my undivided attention were required, that would be one thing, but for the most part, socialising should be relaxed and comfortable and that means being yourself.
> 
> I really do think it's very important that youngsters can see people engaging in crafts.


--------------------

There are times...when having a project in my hands in not such a good idea, mostly for the project, but....THIS was how I was raised too. Knitting is NOT rude, but whatever is being knitted does need to be something that does not require much attention, so that the group I am with is still center stage.

Having my hands busy keeps me away from the food table "grazing", surrounded by those persons I enjoy, and still having "something" to show for the hours that would have been spent...doing virtually nothing.

Just sitting there knitting or crocheting while dishes are being prepared, served or clean up is in progress...would be rude. This is where my knitting or crochet would be put away and I would be working & socializing right along with everyone else.

Everyone KNOWS that I crochet. I've been doing this since I was a child. It is a part of me. Socially...I will drag along just a couple of skeins and a hook so that if my fingers get fidgety these are available. I recently picked back up on knitting, and now I have several much needed apparel items now completed. Like my crochet......my knitting goes with me everywhere. 

When in doubt, I do ask if anyone objects, and in a very wide variety of situations the answer has always been...bring it on.

Then the questions start with: what am I making, why not just buy one, is that difficult, and also the comments that tell me that those who are looking askance at me...feel intimidated because they do not feel like they have any such talent.

The last part is usually where I run into someone who thinks my crochet or knitting while enjoying a social setting...is rude. It is just amazing how one person's insecurity problem can cause so much trouble for other people, but I have seen it over and over.

After all these years....I have finally decided that these people are not going to be allowed to run my life. I now keep my WIP's at hand and enjoy feeling rather smug while I share or show off my talents. When these moments arise....I do try to not be too obnoxious, but I cannot control what other people think.

At over 60...I recently re-joined the dating scene and...before I go out with any fellow....I make it plain that I sew, embroider, crochet, knit, do art work and craft. In addition I grew up in a DIY family where woodworking was something that we all did ...just because we felt like it. Whoever the gents are...they had best know that I am not going to stop, and if they do not like it....they need not bother to call me. 

Lisa


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## janis blondel (May 20, 2011)

I don't think it is rude at all especially if you can knit and chat obviously if you are doing a complicated piece when you are not really listening it becomes rude.


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## JeanBlain (Mar 21, 2013)

Ginialea said:


> If I'm knitting, I'm not eating. This is a good thing!


 :thumbup: I found this to be true, too! :lol:


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## ECLAIRE117 (Apr 8, 2013)

I would go out of my mind if I didn't have something to work on, knitting, crocheting, quilting, reading. I take something everywhere I go, just in case. As for invitations, anyone that might invite me knows who I am and accepts me as is.


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## jsklarsk (Dec 11, 2012)

I really think it is rude to do anything but pay attention to the guests while in a group. How can one give people their undivided attention and treat them as they deserve to be treated if one is also texting, checking messages on a phone, knitting, crocheting, playing a game of solitaire or doing anything at all. One cannot drive a car and pay attention to the road if they are using a phone or doing another activity, so why would one want to do other things when trying to enjoy the company of friends and relatives? if the activity means so much then one should stay home and devote their time and attention to that, not split their attention between people and activities.


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## Edith M (Aug 10, 2011)

I agree with that. Folks that know me know that knitting for me is therapy for my arthritic hands so are used to seeing me knit. Others, once I explain, seem OK with it as well. Asking seems to me to be a great way to start.


Bunbun said:


> People used to ask :"do you mind if I smoke", why not ask if you're doubtful "do you mind if I knit/crochet while we visit"
> Frankly I'd much rather see someone knit/crochet rather than TEXTING.


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## libra59_1 (May 15, 2012)

I think the way you handled the situation was very appropriate. I take my crochet/knit projects along and never have a problem with others.


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## thadeus40 (Dec 30, 2011)

I guess I'm in the minority. I do feel it's rude to knit in a social setting unless everyone else is knitting too. I think we like to feel that we have someones undivided attention when we speak with them and knitting would appear to be a distraction in the other persons perception. Of course I'd love to knit everywhere and it's a great temptation but I do think it lacks a certain sensitivity in a social environment. I'm not judging...just my opinion.


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## thegrape (Nov 11, 2011)

Did your host mention that they were bothered by it or was it someone else in the group? It sounds to me that you were obviously involved in the group. It's way less rude to knit than chat away on one's cell phone or spend large quantities of time texting someone who is not present. Most of us can still converse with a group and knit/crochet at the same time.


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## dotcarp2000 (Sep 5, 2011)

For me, wherever I am , people deserve my undivided attention. I believe it's rude to knit except at the doc's waiting room or a hosp waiting rm. For me, it's as though other people don't matter, only me, when I'm with those that have invited me and then I disregard them and go about my business and knit. 
My opinion only and this is for me only. so those that disagree can do as they please.


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## Jules934 (May 7, 2013)

From a different point of view ---- you're asking avid knitters how they feel. Of course they think it's proper. But what about those who don't knit, crochet, etc? They might feel differently. Or perhaps your (non-knitting) hostesses?


Just a thought.


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## 17 Lola (May 16, 2011)

misellen said:


> You are so judgmental, I wonder if you have a life at all. :hunf:


Judgemental, no. My opinion, yes. I do have a very full life revolving around my family and friends, not knitting. I knit because I enjoy it, but I only do it in my spare time.


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## JeanBlain (Mar 21, 2013)

Okay, people. If we are going to start criticizing people because of their opinions, then, it is time to end this topic. When you start telling people that they are being judgmental, then you are judging. :thumbdown:


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## BlueJay21 (Jan 4, 2013)

From what some people are saying here that manners have just gone right out the window. If I invited someone to my home, I would not expect them to bring their knitting or their crochet. I would feel it was the height of bad manners. I don't care if they are avid knitters or not. If they feel they can not put their work aside for a few hours to converse with people they surely need help. What would you say to an avid baker, for instance, who thought it all right to bring the ingredients of a cake to your house and proceed to bake?

No, I think when I am invited to someone's home they want my company, not my knitting. I can find time in my day to knit, cook, bake, garden, etc., as well as converse one-on-one with friends.

Just plain bad manners to take your work with you when visiting, unless everyone else in the group is knitting.


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## JeanBlain (Mar 21, 2013)

BlueJay21 said:


> From what some people are saying here that manners have just gone right out the window. If I invited someone to my home, I would not expect them to bring their knitting or their crochet. I would feel it was the height of bad manners. I don't care if they are avid knitters or not. If they feel they can not put their work aside for a few hours to converse with people they surely need help. What would you say to an avid baker, for instance, who thought it all right to bring the ingredients of a cake to your house and proceed to bake?
> 
> No, I think when I am invited to someone's home they want my company, not my knitting. I can find time in my day to knit, cook, bake, garden, etc., as well as converse one-on-one with friends.
> 
> Just plain bad manners to take your work with you when visiting, unless everyone else in the group is knitting.


I do agree with you on all that you said. I took my knitting with me to my brother's bash over the 4th as it was a very informal, outdoor thing with family and I knew that it would be okay. If it were say a church picnic or potluck, then I probably would not. I did have it with me when we had a "just because" potluck right after church (because I usually work on knitting or crocheting during Sunday school class; no one minds when I do), but I worked on it a little before everyone was in the fellowship hall/gym to start.


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## jpfries (Jan 14, 2013)

thegrape said:


> Did your host mention that they were bothered by it or was it someone else in the group? It sounds to me that you were obviously involved in the group. It's way less rude to knit than chat away on one's cell phone or spend large quantities of time texting someone who is not present. Most of us can still converse with a group and knit/crochet at the same time.


How do you know it is less rude, of course in your eyes you feel it is. I knit a lot, but sometimes I feel my friends deserve my undivided attention


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## Lily Jamjar (Dec 31, 2012)

If someone makes an unsolicited remark, criticising another person's behaviour, and makes that other person feel imcomfortable, then sorry but I think that can be described as rude.


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## jobailey (Dec 22, 2011)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


I tend to agree with you! If it is very close friends/family and not a planned event, i.e. a casual get together then maybe but if you have been invited to an occasion then my take is "no."


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## nitnana (Feb 3, 2013)

My feeling is that non-knitters would probably consider it rude because they probably don't know that you (most of you!) can knit, carry on a conversation and be sociable all at the same time. As someone said, reading would be rude - it would mean you are not interested in the conversation or the people. I have had guests pick up a magazine and leaf through it in my living room while we are all chatting and being social - I think that is RUDE along with using phones, texting, computers, etc. Best suggestion - ask the hostess if she minds!


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## joanne12986 (Apr 30, 2011)

susan heierman said:


> Like so many others here, my knitting goes where I go. Just based on the fact that you asked this question, you are a polite and astute person. At a BBQ, where it's a more informal setting, definitely. At a gathering that is more formal, of course not. Judging by your question, you are not likely to offend anyone. You know what's rude or not. You sound like a nice person. You can bring your knitting to my house any day! However, if I am the hostess, I will be insanely jealous!!!


 :thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## Elin (Sep 17, 2011)

I think it's rude. The attention should be given to the host and company not to the k2p2 ribbing!

To me, it would seem that you're not enjoying the company enough so you knit--just wrong.


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## ladybug48 (Jul 1, 2012)

Off topic, but, those are beautiful Schnauzers!


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## knitonepurlone (Mar 27, 2011)

Bun Bun, my thoughts exactly! I too would rather see someone knitting rather then texting. Kids and adults too, who are constantly using their kindles and cell phones are rude. I see nothing wrong with knitting in the company of others.


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

nitnana said:


> . Best suggestion - ask the hostess if she minds!


I do wonder many hostesses would actually say 'no'. I think people would be too polite to say anything , so I think knitters just assume its okay because no-one actually pitches a fit when they do haul out their knitting.

I love knitting - I actually got railed by my husband for 'too much knitting' just this afternoon ( I wasn't even knitting and usually only get a chance in the evening after dinner). He said I do too much of it and should do other things.......like baking him treats for example. I gave him a scathing look and told him he is knocking on the wrong door - interfere with my knitting time and he may just find himself on the street or something like that. If you want treats, life your arse off the couch and go get yourself some at the bakery!


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## Angelsmom1 (Jan 28, 2012)

I agree that there is a time and place for...fill in he blank.. But for me, everyone knows I knit and crochet and will more than likely want to do it while they visit me. I am homebound and most of my friends also share our addiction.As for my church? I don't out of respect, but I bet they wouldn't care as that is where I learned, in a group there.


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## grandmann (Feb 4, 2011)

Bunbun said:


> People used to ask :"do you mind if I smoke", why not ask if you're doubtful "do you mind if I knit/crochet while we visit"
> Frankly I'd much rather see someone knit/crochet rather than TEXTING.


I was going to say that TEXTING. I think that is rude when you try carrying on a conversation someone in the group is TEXTING!

My knitting group carries on a lively conversation while we are knitting. Oh yes it is possible to knit or crochet while visiting.


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## run4fittness (May 22, 2011)

I see nothing wrong with taking your knitting along with you! But that is just my POO (personal opinion only)!


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## pjcoldren (Dec 20, 2011)

If your friend, the hostess, didn't mind - then it's nobody else's business. If you think your friend did mind, ask her (in private) and go from there. Please . . . some people really need to lighten up and let things go. JMHO.


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## jobailey (Dec 22, 2011)

ladybug48 said:


> Off topic, but, those are beautiful Schnauzers!


Thank you so much! Your's looks like a sweety too!


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## kathycam (Apr 24, 2012)

Jessica-Jean said:


> Add to the no no list: texting, answering the bedamned cell phone and conversing at full voice while still within the group!
> 
> My knitting and me go everywhere. Business meetings included. It's a part of who I am. Love me, love my knitting!:-D
> 
> No. I didn't knit at my parents' funerals, nor on the drives to/from the cemeteries. But I did plenty of knitting before and after. It's all that kept me sort of sane. If I were still a churchgoer, I'd knit during interminable sermons - for sure! ;-)


You are so right about the !^&&% cell phone. I'm afraid we have a whole generation of people who have no idea of life before your phone went with you everywhere. A brand new book of etiquette needs to be published concerning cell phone use. Do these people even read anything but tests?

As for knitting at funerals, of course I don't, but the fancy lap robe I made for my grandmother was stolen at the hospital just before she passed. She had wanted to be buried with it so I knitted just about around the clock until her funeral to make another one....and it did keep me sane. (At least I didn't try to kill the suspected thief!) The 2nd lap robe was smaller than the first but still looked the same and I've always hoped that my grandmother never knew her original was stolen.


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## Jamie (Mar 10, 2011)

karenwhipple said:


> .If I was invited to a social event I would not bring my knitting. The purpose of the activity is to socialize with people. Knitting at these events sends a message that your interest is not there.


I have to disagree with this disagreement ... knitting does not prevent anyone from socializing ... just attend any knitting group. You will see everyone knitting and socializing just fine. Many people function better with their hands occupied, it has nothing to do with lack of interest in everything else going on.


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## MinnieMouse (Mar 29, 2013)

I don't consider a bbq a formal sit down inside dinner. The friends giving the bbq should know you well enough to know you would have you bag with you. If not sure, I would ask hostess. Someone else making rules for their home or get together? I'd think that might be who would be offended, maybe at the thought you might get little more attention, questions...For me, I would not appreciate ANYBODY saying what is appropriate at our home. One friend takes her cross stich everywhere she goes yet still able to help and visit with everybody. No one ever been offended that I know of. I usually do my crafts at home when it's quiet. Also leave cell phone in car unless family member very bad sick or hurt but still let calls go to voice mail to be answered later.


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## Ginialea (Nov 9, 2012)

ladybug48 said:


> Off topic, but, those are beautiful Schnauzers!


And an adorable Yorkie! or is it a Silkie?


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## jlschulke (Mar 19, 2011)

TinaOR said:


> As knitters, are we presumptious to think it is ok to craft in front of non crafters? Of course there are occasions when it would seem inappropriate (funerals, job interviews, business meetings), but in the main if you can knit and still join in whatever is going on around you then is it wrong to do it?
> Yesterday it was suggested to me that to take along my knitting bag to a barbeque at a friend's house could be seen as rude and inappropriate.
> My friend is a non knitter, but she shows interest in what I do without ever having intentions to give it a go herself. She has a husband (also a non knitter) and children (non knitters). We were to eat, then sit and chat for a few hours, just generally enjoying each others company.
> I did take my knitting but restricted myself to a few rows. I still helped serve food, helped clear up, spoke to everyone there, including the little children and played with the new puppy. Do you think I was doing anything wrong when I clicked my sticks a little at one point? I think not! What do you say?


It was not the person whose house you were at that said you were rude, was it? I would say the person who said you were rude, was rude HERSELF.


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## shanni (Apr 18, 2011)

Probably the only place my knitting doesn't go with me is to funerals. Although I did knit in the back of the car to and from one last week. I go to the bar with my husband on Sunday's after we have been out for lunch, I knit while waiting for lunch and sit at the bar and knit, on the bus, watching tv, lunchbreak at work, pretty much anywhere apart from the bathroom. Have never had a negative comment about it, if you can knit then do so no matter where, who knows you might get someone else interested and that has to be a good thing


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## Joyp (Feb 4, 2012)

kathycam said:


> You are so right about the !^&&% cell phone. I'm afraid we have a whole generation of people who have no idea of life before your phone went with you everywhere. A brand new book of etiquette needs to be published concerning cell phone use. Do these people even read anything but tests?
> 
> As for knitting at funerals, of course I don't, but the fancy lap robe I made for my grandmother was stolen at the hospital just before she passed. She had wanted to be buried with it so I knitted just about around the clock until her funeral to make another one....and it did keep me sane. (At least I didn't try to kill the suspected thief!) The 2nd lap robe was smaller than the first but still looked the same and I've always hoped that my grandmother never knew her original was stolen.


It is absolutely disgusting that someone at the hospital would steal from a dying woman....but...theft as with imitation, is a sincere form of flattery. The lap rug must have been truly beautiful.


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## jpfries (Jan 14, 2013)

yes, MY KNITTING GROUP carries on lively conversations as well. We are all there to knit and have great social times, but not to everything. OK enough said


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## JeanBee (Jul 8, 2013)

I agree, the rug must have been beautiful. My friend's mother's rug was taken from her at the nursing home, my mother in her late 90's donated her rug to my friend's mother.


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## KnitPicker (Jan 19, 2011)

TinaOR said:


> As knitters, are we presumptious to think it is ok to craft in front of non crafters? .....it was suggested to me that to take along my knitting bag to a barbeque at a friend's house could be seen as rude and inappropriate. ....We were to eat, then sit and chat for a few hours, just generally enjoying each others company. .....Do you think I was doing anything wrong when I clicked my sticks a little at one point? I think not! What do you say?


You wrote: "We were to eat, then sit and chat for a few hours, just generally enjoying each others company. " You said it all - so, yes, it is impolite under these circumstances since she wanted to visit with you, not watch you knit.

I know this is a touchy subject and hope I don't offend anyone - don't mean to. For me, just me, if anyone comes when I expect to visit with them and enjoy their company, I would think they like and enjoy me enough to put aside their knitting. However, if we are knitting together, in a knitting club or gathering, it is totally acceptable. Whether one is a knitter or not, it is not acceptable under the rules of etiquette to occupy yourself with something else when under the pretense (and/or invitation) of visiting with someone. The mind, according to all the scientists, cannot be occupied with more than one thought at a time. Think of all the things you're missing! If one can't sit still and enjoy another's company for 30 minutes or an hour or so without knitting (not necessarily anything wrong with that), then simply decline the offer and stay home and knit. Just one knitter's opinion and said with love for all of you.


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## marykelly (Oct 9, 2012)

I never really thought about it. The knitting kept my hands busy. I took it to Bible Studies, picnics, parties, or anytime we were sitting in an informal setting. Nobody ever has complained, and in fact others followed my example. It never occurred to me that someone might be offended. Anyone who was wasted time, as far as I'm concerned. And my mind can follow more than one thought at a time, and frequently does. How handicapped someone with a one track mind must be. I have at least three!


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## Hurricane (May 18, 2013)

KnitPicker said:


> The mind, according to all the scientists, cannot be occupied with more than one thought at a time .


I'm not certain where you heard this, I'd be interested in reading more.

My take on this is that having a * simple * project that I don't need to look at in my hands * allows* my ADHD mind to slow down and concentrate on the conversation. The project in my hands helps my mind to stop changing channels and focus on the moment. I have found I concentrate better on what is happening with a simple project in my hands. I keep very basic garter stitch, no shaping (usually) knitting around just for that purpose. I've never run into anyone that minded, and most are interested in what I'm doing.

One time at a birthday party for a young relative I even finished knitting her gift of a scarf shaped as a dragon as we all sat around chatting before and after our lunch (I did help out also). This was the only time I broke my simplicity rule. Everyone there, especially the birthday girl, was fascinated that I finished her gift in front of them, without any of them realizing what it was and in time to present it to her with her other gifts.


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## StaceyR (Feb 9, 2013)

:thumbup:


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## yona (Feb 7, 2011)

I take my knitting everywhere I go, even to the beach. When in someone's home, I do participate in the activities, help the hostess etc.. and then.... out comes my knitting.

I've only been asked once to put my knitting away... and thankfully, I'm no longer associated with that person who seemed to emulate me at work & outside of work. But, I guess knitting was the one thing she couldn't emulate...


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

If it's a formal gathering I don't take my knitting bag. If it's family and/or close friends... I take my bag. It also goes with me to doctor's appointments, traveling, etc.


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## elaineadams (Oct 17, 2011)

I don't think you did wrong, you helped out and were socialable, and perhaps the knitting helped the talking along, maybe the children were interested in what you were doing as well as the adults. When ever I go to things like that, I take some spare needles along with me and some spare yarn and if the children show an interest I cast on a few stitches and then let them have a go, helping them along the way....who knows it might be the introduction to another person who grows to think the same as I do about our craft, a new fellow stasher


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## TeeneeBee (Jun 14, 2013)

KnitPicker said:


> The mind, according to all the scientists, cannot be occupied with more than one thought at a time.


This is incorrect as the brain has specialised areas and the areas for movement and physical activity like knitting is not concerned with socialising, paying attention to someone, communicating etc.. This is why it is so rude to be texting or emailing etc. while in a group.

If someone is told they will be sitting around chatting for hours (not minutes or partial hour) then it is informal and people should be themselves. If knitting is part of who they are then I am sure they would be expected to express that. If the hostess has no problem with it, it's nobody else's business.

It seems that some people would demand undivided attention for the entire day, then you can choose to leave knitting alone, or just not go to their events.

I cannot maintain eye contact or chat for any length of time, I'm just not built that way, and although I love to be around people, to be expected to fully engage for hours would be totally exhausting for me. At an event like the one described it would be necessary for me to go somewhere quiet periodically however much I enjoyed the company. If I could sit and knit/crochet I would endure much better. It is not about getting attention for myself either (I find that an odd idea). Having something in my hands might help to give something to focus on outside myself, not on me.

I could of course be excluded from social events (this happens a lot, mainly because they are too intense for me and I need too long a recovery time to make it worthwhile), or people could be understanding and not get their egos in a twist by taking it personally.

I prefer to hang out with understanding people who aren't so insecure as to require my undivided attention for an entire day (that's really intense). I sometimes think that people are so concerned with what they perceive to be 'etiquette' that they forget that their are other matters of etiquette they are missing like understanding that we don't all have the same needs. Etiquette is often a substitute for good manners: Habits and rules should never be put before people IMO.


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## sanditoes48 (Feb 6, 2013)

1318 said:


> Yes, I think it is inappropriate and rude to take it to a social function. You were invited there
> as their guest to socialize with the other quests not to sit there and knit. If you wanted to knit, you should have declined the invitation .


I think I have to agree with this response. When you are invited somewhere it is for your company and to engage in conversation or "whatever" and to multitask is inappropriate at these times. That said, when I have a friend over to visit I usually do knit while we chat but in mixed company at an affair I would forgo that pleasure. ;-)


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## MacRae (Dec 3, 2011)

No I don't think you were doing anything wrong. You were setting a wonderful example of being creative and that is a plus in my book. For those who criticize, look back to when manners were so very important and you will see that the women would work on their hand work and chatter at the same time. Another plus is that when the gossip starts you can put your head down and knit like crazy. Keep on knitting. 

Daphne


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## SweetPandora (May 9, 2013)

I took my crocheting to my sister's house for the July 4th holiday gathering. After the meal and clean up, I pulled out my work, and started crocheting while talking to my family. My niece's fiancee was watching me intently, and we started talking about the craft. He kept saying he was in awe of me being able to crochet while carrying on a conversation without missing a beat. 

Then he started asking me questions about how it is done, so I showed him that it really is a simple craft of making a bunch of loops that are interconnected. I may have found my next student


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## Davena (Feb 24, 2013)

Very interesting topic with mixed opinion. I would like to share a story. I was at a family gathering at Easter and my two nieces were on their phones playing games or texting friends when my sister read them the riot act about their rudeness and how they might as well not been here etc etc. They were helping when needed to help out and answered questions when asked. They were embarassed at their Aunts lecture and apologized to her and went in to the house. 
Next family gathering at my lake home every one came and the same Aunt brought her knitting and sat with it while visiting. I noticed the two girls watching her but never said a word to her as I know they wouldnt so I tackled it myself. It was my house and I love her dearly also she is my best friend. So jokingly I asked her how does this differ than the girls being on there phones at Easter time than you sitting knitting? The conversation went into further chatting ,more than I want to type, but you get my message. She invited the girls for their input also and it ended up the aunt apologized to the girls and both sides agreed there is no difference. Many times my other sisters and SIL will not ask her to help do something when she is knitting. They do not want to interupt her. So she now knits when there is just her and I and we knit or crochet together when visiting. My nieces are coming for knit lessons and they are going to teach their old aunts how to text and get full use out of our phones. A real win win story. Thanks for listening...Davena


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## Hurricane (May 18, 2013)

Davena, I see a big difference between playing games or texting and knitting in company. Knitting something often invites conversation and intrigues other people. As long as the knitter is certain to participate in the conversation, help out and generally be a good guest I don't see an issue. 

Playing games and especially texting says "I'm bored and want something better to do". You feel the other person is not engaged in the conversation. I will not play my games at a gathering or text or even answer my phone when with others. That said, there are a few exceptions to those rules, and I always apologize and try to be quick if necessity dictates answering a phone call or text when in company. 

We had some new friends in this spring to watch hockey playoffs with us. We all sat down to chat and I had my "mindless knitting" in my lap. I said how i always knit when chatting and watching TV. We were talking and watching the game when I noticed the wife of the couple playing a game on her cell phone. I had no idea she didn't like hockey. I decided to sacrifice watching the game ( I do like hockey) and invited her into a different room to chat. I also put down my knitting at that point. I know people have my undivided attention even if knitting is in my hands, but I wanted her to know it. We ended up having a wonderful chat, and went to their home for a game a few weeks later. I left my knitting in the car since it wasn't my home and they are relatively new friends. I figured I'd see which way the wind blew so to speak and get it from the car if I wanted it. 

When she gets to know me better she very well may start asking where my work is like most of my friends do. Everyone who has known me for a while is generally surprised if I don't have knitting nearby. Some people ask about my projects fairly regularly and send me information they think may interest me and I have one friend who even brings me the occasional skein of pretty yarn since she saw it and just had to get it for me! 

I know I'm rambling a bit, but my point is the knitter needs to be a good guest first, and also assess the situation. Knitting at a wedding, No. Knitting at a backyard BBQ, why not?


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## gransh (Jan 27, 2011)

Several years ago the Board of Elders at our church held their meeting once a month on Sunday evening. We met in our homes. While the men had the meeting the women socilized. I started taking my knitting/crocheting. As some of you stated I contributed to the conversation and helped the hostess. Know what happened? All the women started bringing some type of needlework and we had a ball. I take mine where ever I go and use my judgement as to whether or not it is appropiate. I'd rather have it with me than not have it and "wish I had brought it".


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## reborn knitter (Apr 7, 2013)

I have taken my knitting to the beach or to outdoor gatherings where several activities are taking place that I would normally be a spectator at. I do not take it so a child's soccer or baseball game because I don't want to miss something like a great save or hit and not be able to talk about it afterwards. Informal,all -day outings are okay but I leave my project at home for more structured small group gatherings. I guess it comes down to the situation, the group and one's own comfort level. To each his/her own I say!


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## Meyow (May 2, 2013)

I think we've pretty much covered the waterfront on this issue. I vote for common sense and do what is comfortable for you and yours. No one here can decide for you.


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## Hurricane (May 18, 2013)

Meyow said:


> I think we've pretty much covered the waterfront on this issue. I vote for common sense and do what is comfortable for you and yours. No one here can decide for you.


 :thumbup:


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## LittleKid (Nov 17, 2011)

As much as I hate to say it - I agree with 1318. Your ivited some where because they enjoy your company , not to watch you knit. Many people become involved in worndering what you are making. That draws the interest of the party 
away from it's original purpose. It's also looks as if you are bored or looking for attention. Have I ever done this SURE I HAVE. Was it because I was bored YOU BET I WAS. Do I like to knit or crochet YES. Every situation in different.
Ask first if they think anyone would mind.
Or you could contact one of the Help Columns and see what their take on the subject.

I know that I am out numbered on the subject, but just give it a thought. It's at least worth that.


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## BlueJay21 (Jan 4, 2013)

I agree.


KnitPicker said:


> You wrote: "We were to eat, then sit and chat for a few hours, just generally enjoying each others company. " You said it all - so, yes, it is impolite under these circumstances since she wanted to visit with you, not watch you knit.
> 
> I know this is a touchy subject and hope I don't offend anyone - don't mean to. For me, just me, if anyone comes when I expect to visit with them and enjoy their company, I would think they like and enjoy me enough to put aside their knitting. However, if we are knitting together, in a knitting club or gathering, it is totally acceptable. Whether one is a knitter or not, it is not acceptable under the rules of etiquette to occupy yourself with something else when under the pretense (and/or invitation) of visiting with someone. The mind, according to all the scientists, cannot be occupied with more than one thought at a time. Think of all the things you're missing! If one can't sit still and enjoy another's company for 30 minutes or an hour or so without knitting (not necessarily anything wrong with that), then simply decline the offer and stay home and knit. Just one knitter's opinion and said with love for all of you.


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## TinaOR (May 22, 2011)

Well, well, this certainly brought out mixed reactions. Can I just say a big thank you to those who praised me for knitting in public, especially the lovely lady who said I would be welcome in her home! We are all welcome to our own opinions, just hope some of you did not get too stressed whilst making negative comments. Knitting should be a pleasure and talking about it should be too. x


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## tryalot (Apr 29, 2012)

Some think its rude to leave theTV on when company arrives,
Others say they can listen to both.


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## Kathie (Mar 29, 2011)

I would think if you are questioning it at all you shouldn't do it. I know I wouldn't but I also wouldn't care if someone else knit while they were visiting.


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## PatriciaDF (Jan 29, 2011)

I usually take my knitting along. Depends where I am going and who I am going to be visiting with. In our family, there are quite a few people who talk "shop" (business) when we get together and I am bored to death, so I knit. (Been there, done that) and am retired and don't want to relive it all! Helps me to keep my sanity. Texting and phones are a whole 'nuther topic. Drives me nuts!


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## connorpass (Apr 19, 2012)

I wouldn't knit in a social situation like that, but I seem to be in the minority here. Then again, I can't walk and chew gum at the same time, so if I was knitting it would take my attention away from the conversation. If your host finds it acceptable, then who cares what anyone else thinks? Go for it.


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## EB1411 (Oct 25, 2012)

Take your knitting! You're still engaging in the event and no one has complained. The hosts should be happy that you are so comfortable in their home. Last week my book club met and one of the other members brought her knitting. No one batted an eye and I was interested in seeing what she was doing since I was between projects.


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## JeanBlain (Mar 21, 2013)

tryalot said:


> Some think its rude to leave theTV on when company arrives,
> Others say they can listen to both.


With us, it depends on who the company is. If my brother or kids come, then, no, we don't turn off the TV. The pastor, now, that's a different story. :lol:


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## sanditoes48 (Feb 6, 2013)

Meyow said:


> I think we've pretty much covered the waterfront on this issue. I vote for common sense and do what is comfortable for you and yours. No one here can decide for you.


This sounds like a very "sane" solution. Use common sense and good manners.... :wink:


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## Angelsmom1 (Jan 28, 2012)

sanditoes48 said:


> This sounds like a very "sane" solution. Use common sense and good manners.... :wink:


amen


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## knittingflowers (Apr 18, 2013)

It seems to me that you behaved in a perfectly acceptable manner, joining in activities, etc. I think we all can knit and visit at the same time, so it seems that the "friend" who "suggested" that it wasn't appropriate is the one who was "inappropriate" and it is their problem, not yours. I knit a lot of places. I even took my knitting to Sunday school class, the minister didn't have a problem with it and didn't say anything, but my Dad called and he said someone meaning his 2nd wife had a problem with my knitting during Sunday School. I told him it didn't bother the minister so nobody else should care as long as I came and participated appropriately.


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## island stasher (Dec 23, 2012)

I usally ask my hosts if they mind me knitting, and I make sure to not bring something so complicated that I can't chat easily while I knit.


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## island stasher (Dec 23, 2012)

I usally ask my hosts if they mind me knitting, and I make sure to not bring something so complicated that I can't chat easily while I knit.


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## Ma Kitty (Mar 15, 2013)

I was just visiting my sweet little mother and brought crocheting for the plane and while I visited her. I made her two crocheted scarves and crocheted on a poncho for me. It gives me something to do on the plane and it gives me something to do while she snoozes during the visit. She's 89 and although very spry for her age, snoozes quite a bit. So, rather than be bored, I do handwork.


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## selyasa (Apr 10, 2012)

I say knit wherever you like besides job interviews. We have several knitters at my church who knit throughout the service, except when they pick up their hymnals. Of course, it's a Unitarian Universalist congregation, which is an open and affirming fellowship.

Angi


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## BlueJay21 (Jan 4, 2013)

Ma Kitty said:


> I was just visiting my sweet little mother and brought crocheting for the plane and while I visited her. I made her two crocheted scarves and crocheted on a poncho for me. It gives me something to do on the plane and it gives me something to do while she snoozes during the visit. She's 89 and although very spry for her age, snoozes quite a bit. So, rather than be bored, I do handwork.


That's a bit different from knitting in company. You are not exactly in company whilst on the plane, and knitting while your mother is napping seems like a perfectly good way to spend the time. The problem is, does one knit in company? I still maintain the answer is no. It seems extremely rude to me. But maybe I am from a different age and culture.

However, this question has certainly opened up a can of worms. From the replies, there are few members of the KP club that I would invite to my home. If their knitting is more important to them than spending time in the company of friends and enjoying everyone's whole hearted attention, then they, in my opinion (and it is only my opinion) need some lessons in good manners.


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## glenniemae (Mar 13, 2011)

I take my knitting almost everywhere with me. Your hostess knows you knit, and you helped out with the bar-b-q. I'd rather see someone knitting/crocheting/needlework, then someone blabbing on the cell phone. :thumbup:


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## knittingdragon (Jun 15, 2012)

The big thing I got from the initial post is that the hostess did not have a problem with the guest knitting. So as far as I am concerned there is no problem. If others present DID have a problem then they need to ask themselves why. The hostess didn't mind - in fact was interested in what the guest was knitting - so obviously the guest had cleared it with the hostess before getting her knitting out.


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## mavisb (Apr 18, 2011)

Ma Kitty: I am like you my mother is also 89 and she tends to fight staying awake after being at the hospital for an appointment so I take myself off home. I still talk to her and knit at the same time while 90 year old dad sleeps on.


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## Ma Kitty (Mar 15, 2013)

mavisb said:


> Ma Kitty: I am like you my mother is also 89 and she tends to fight staying awake after being at the hospital for an appointment so I take myself off home. I still talk to her and knit at the same time while 90 year old dad sleeps on.


I remember when the ruffle scarves were big I made my mom a whole bunch. She picked the yarn and I bought it. I even made her a few that are like a ring around the neck. Those were done on circulars. She likes to brag to her friends that I made them. They all think I'm very clever. It's all about family at that age and how they treat them. Luckily for my little mom, my brother and I treat her like gold.


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## april1963 (May 29, 2013)

Basketball officials love me to knit during games.....i do not yell at poorly called games as much. Lol


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## Thatbella (Jan 9, 2013)

If it is family there would be no issue.
If it is to a friend's gathering where it is a mixed group I would be a bit miffed if someone took out their knitting or any type craft.
I would wonder why you accepted the invitation if you could not just come and "join in"
I think it depends on the type of group gathering if it is appropriate or not - coffee with the girls, of course - no problem.
Invitation to dinner or a barbie - perhaps not.


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## BlueJay21 (Jan 4, 2013)

I was watching Miss Marple movie the other night and was interested to see, particularly after this discussion, that she had her knitting with her wherever she was, except at a dinner party. I was also intrigued to notice that she never had the same item of knitting twice. I guess Miss Marple was one of those people who takes their knitting everywhere (except to formal functions).

I did find it a bit disconcerting, however, to see her knitting when those around her were carrying on conversation. I still maintain it is rude to knit in company. So, I guess, Miss Marple was rude. Shame on her!


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## JeanBlain (Mar 21, 2013)

april1963 said:


> Basketball officials love me to knit during games.....i do not yell at poorly called games as much. Lol


 :lol: :thumbup: :lol:


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## Isabel (Mar 15, 2011)

I haven't read all the replies, but I think I agree with many of them, if not most. My knitting goes where I go. If you participate in whatever is going on and don't withdraw to concentrate on the handwork, I don't see a problem. I don't knit in church, but I do in my prayer group, but it's small and informal and they know me, and I participate fully in any discussion (not during the praying!).


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## mavisb (Apr 18, 2011)

Blue Jay : Miss Maple was not rude. This was only a movie/film whatever and it was in the script so there was no shame on her. I take my knitting with me but whether I knit or not is usually up to me. I knit or crochet at my son's house, he has people drop in but I don't give up knitting or crochet as the crochet was for one of the friends that popped in.

Also Miss Maple is a fictitous person, not a real person.


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## knittingdragon (Jun 15, 2012)

mavisb said:


> Blue Jay : Miss Maple was not rude. This was only a movie/film whatever and it was in the script so there was no shame on her. I take my knitting with me but whether I knit or not is usually up to me. I knit or crochet at my son's house, he has people drop in but I don't give up knitting or crochet as the crochet was for one of the friends that popped in.
> 
> Also Miss Maple is a fictitous person, not a real person.


When Agatha Christie created Miss Marple she created a little older lady who could settle into the background knitting while listening to what was going on around her. She used the knitting ruse to gather information about crimes and murders and was responsible for solving cases that the local constabulary were unable to. While she was knitting she could study body language, she could watch the way people interacted with others, she could get into places where the police couldn't comfortably get into. She was normal and unassuming and therefore less threatening. Her knitting helped others around her relax and she was able to talk to people and get information that she normally wouldn't have been able to.


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## BlueJay21 (Jan 4, 2013)

mavisb said:


> Blue Jay : Miss Maple was not rude. This was only a movie/film whatever and it was in the script so there was no shame on her. I take my knitting with me but whether I knit or not is usually up to me. I knit or crochet at my son's house, he has people drop in but I don't give up knitting or crochet as the crochet was for one of the friends that popped in.
> 
> Also Miss Maple is a fictitous person, not a real person.


As if I don't know Miss Marple is a fictional character. Some people just don't get the point. I don't care why she was knitting. I don't care if it was in the script. The point I was making was that some people take their knitting everywhere, and in this day and age I think it is rude. But to each his own. Maybe enough has been said on this subject. Some people think it is OK and some think it is rude. I wouldn't accept it if someone brought out their knitting if invited to my house, unless everyone present was knitting, crocheting, etc.


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## Ma Kitty (Mar 15, 2013)

I can think of a lot more rude things than knitting in company. Anyone with even a base sense of manners can probably gauge the group and make the right choice. I take mine quite often but leave it in the car. If I see its appropriate, I go and get it. If not, I don't. I think we've all been invited to something and everyone seems to be doing their own thing so knitting is okay. But, if you have to keep up with the conversation then it's probably not a good idea. It's difficult to be rigid about this topic. There's so many variables. Anyway, whoever started this topic, well done!


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## Hurricane (May 18, 2013)

Ma Kitty said:


> I can think of a lot more rude things than knitting in company. Anyone with even a base sense of manners can probably gauge the group and make the right choice. I take mine quite often but leave it in the car. If I see its appropriate, I go and get it. If not, I don't. I think we've all been invited to something and everyone seems to be doing their own thing so knitting is okay. But, if you have to keep up with the conversation then it's probably not a good idea. It's difficult to be rigid about this topic. There's so many variables. Anyway, whoever started this topic, well done!


 :thumbup:


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## btanner51 (Mar 25, 2013)

I would have to agree with you. Even the best knitters have to pay some attention to what they are knitting, and this takes away from paying attention to what is going on around them. I love to knit--but as a boss, I would think it extremely poor judgment if an employee were knitting during a meeting. I would ask him/her to quit, and if the behavior persisted, there would have to be some discipline. 
Those who do not knit perceive people who knit at social events as being unsociable and inattentive to what is going on--and as a knitter, I have to admit they are.


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## Nanxy (Feb 25, 2011)

TinaOR said:


> As knitters, are we presumptious to think it is ok to craft in front of non crafters? Of course there are occasions when it would seem inappropriate (funerals, job interviews, business meetings), but in the main if you can knit and still join in whatever is going on around you then is it wrong to do it?
> Yesterday it was suggested to me that to take along my knitting bag to a barbeque at a friend's house could be seen as rude and inappropriate.
> My friend is a non knitter, but she shows interest in what I do without ever having intentions to give it a go herself. She has a husband (also a non knitter) and children (non knitters). We were to eat, then sit and chat for a few hours, just generally enjoying each others company.
> I did take my knitting but restricted myself to a few rows. I still helped serve food, helped clear up, spoke to everyone there, including the little children and played with the new puppy. Do you think I was doing anything wrong when I clicked my sticks a little at one point? I think not! What do you say?


Did you ask the hostess if she felt bad about your knitting? Was the person that told you not to take your knitting, the person giving the BBQ? I will pY attention to the host or hostess. Normally I do ask if people feel bad or it bothers them if I knit, in general most people understand that I can do that and be very involved in whatever is going around me.


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## BlueJay21 (Jan 4, 2013)

btanner51 said:


> I would have to agree with you. Even the best knitters have to pay some attention to what they are knitting, and this takes away from paying attention to what is going on around them. I love to knit--but as a boss, I would think it extremely poor judgment if an employee were knitting during a meeting. I would ask him/her to quit, and if the behavior persisted, there would have to be some discipline.
> Those who do not knit perceive people who knit at social events as being unsociable and inattentive to what is going on--and as a knitter, I have to admit they are.


Couldn't have said it better.


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## Hurricane (May 18, 2013)

btanner51 said:


> Those who do not knit perceive people who knit at social events as being unsociable and inattentive to what is going on--and as a knitter, I have to admit they are.


I agree that to knit during business meetings is inappropriate.

However, I have never found that other people find me to be unsociable or inattentive to what is going on at social events when I've brought knitting. Often it becomes the opposite. Others will engage me because they find me easy to approach. My knitting helps settle my ADHD and makes me a better listener. It does depend on the social situation as well and you have to read the room, but sometimes it is a conversation opener the same way an unusual accessory for your outfit can be.


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## mavisb (Apr 18, 2011)

Blue Jay, I am sorry if I upset you, but I always take my knitting/crochet with me everywhere I go as my husband drives most of the time we are together, hence a lot of knitting can be done, especially travelling up to Lithgow which takes us about 1:05 hours. Lithgow is up and over the Blue Mountains. I always take my knitting in with me and it depends on what is happening when I get it out or not. We have a baby step-great granddaughter there so I spend some time playing games with her.

I would love to take my knitting into my business meeting as I fall asleep as it is boring and has really nothing to do with me as it is a Laboratory meeting. I jokingly told the Lab Manager who said I could take my knitting with me but I don't think my boss would appreciate it.


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