# Knitting not appreciated



## Debsy (Oct 15, 2012)

I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
Thanks for listening and understanding.
Debbie


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## Phoebe's Mother (Aug 27, 2012)

Wonderful and loving "therapy"! I think your Plan B is a really nice one!


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## lynncarol33 (Aug 1, 2013)

It does make you feel bad when your hard work isn't appreciated. You should have been thanked and shown gratitude. You have the right idea in getting some dolls and making them clothes for children who don't get much for Christmas. I'll bet they'll be happy about it!


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## nitnana (Feb 3, 2013)

Kids can be cruel, can't they? Parents should have told her just to say, "Thanx - I love them!" I once took apart and sewed a small teddy bear back together (his leg broke off) and, granted it was not a perfect job, but it took me a while & I did the best I could. My GD looked at it, said she didn't like it and left it at my house. He still sits on my bed, many, many years later!


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## NY Hummer (Oct 16, 2012)

Feel so badly for you -
it's so hard to put your heart into something, and it seems that it's not cared about ~
Perhaps she's just not *into* dolls right now? I know some girls develop a love for dolls at a very young age, others don't until they are in school, while some don't think about dolls til they get to the Barbie, etc. age.
That's a wonderful idea to knit outfits for Christmas gifts to make some little girl squeal with delight! Our stores have Angel trees at the holiday season, you choose a name and there are ideas of what the child is wishing for - so I know you will make a little girl very excited on Christmas morning!
You could also donate them to groups in need of outfits for babies - preemies, etc.
Bless your heart as you reach out to others.

ps--don't give up on your grand-girl - one day she most likely get into those bags of outfits and be using them!


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## cevers (Jul 8, 2011)

A lot of us have received similar reactions to our knitted offerings, and we sympathize with you and your feelings. Your plans to continue knitting doll clothes for children who want and need them is admirable and will be fulfilling for you. Carry on!


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## sockyarn (Jan 26, 2011)

It is the parents that teach the children to be that way. Yes use your time to make something that will be wanted.


nitnana said:


> Kids can be cruel, can't they? Parents should have told her just to say, "Thanx - I love them!" I once took apart and sewed a small teddy bear back together (his leg broke off) and, granted it was not a perfect job, but it took me a while & I did the best I could. My GD looked at it, said she didn't like it and left it at my house. He still sits on my bed, many, many years later!


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## Chocolatechips (Jan 6, 2012)

So sorry, but I understand those feelings. My only GD is 6 and loves the doll clothes I make (only 1 outfit/year now,) but still I cringe when I see them all "lumped" in a heap when we visit MA. But she plays with them (she has 3 dolls from her "rich" grandparents) with her friends. I also make some for my own doll (from Mary Maxim) as it's a great way to practice new techniques without too much tinking. I love the idea of making these outfits for charity, and will try that for Christmas. Sometimes dolls chow up at thrift stores. Keep knitting for your own enjoyment. That's what really counts.


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## NY Hummer (Oct 16, 2012)

nitnana said:


> Kids can be cruel, can't they? Parents should have told her just to say, "Thanx - I love them!" I once took apart and sewed a small teddy bear back together (his leg broke off) and, granted it was not a perfect job, but it took me a while & I did the best I could. My GD looked at it, said she didn't like it and left it at my house. He still sits on my bed, many, many years later!


oh, how heart-breaking ~
what a shame that she didn't love her teddy bear just because he wasn't perfect anymore.....
and didn't even think of how much love you put into getting it back together - take a photo of him, save it for her - years later she may wish she had her Teddy back.


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## susanrs1 (Mar 21, 2011)

Don't waste your time on her any more and go with your plan b. Kids who don't get much appreciate everything. Your talents are being wasted right now. I've been there with unappreciative people and believe me, no more.

I feel bad for you because I know exactly how it feels - no kids or grandkids but knitted enough for other people who don't appreciate it. Stick with people who love your work, you will feel much better.


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## headlemk (Feb 16, 2011)

You've got the right attitude. Buy some little dolls from GoodWill or a resale shop, knit some pretty clothes for them and give them to a needy child. THEN it will be very much appreciated.


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## lynnlassiter (Jun 30, 2011)

good for you! WalMart sells their brand of "AG"dolls for $20. Maybe you findsome some in good condition at the thrift stores.


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## Swedenme (May 28, 2014)

You should check out thrift stores or something similar for dolls and yarn . Here in England the Salvation Army collect donations to give presents at christmas .Maybe there is something similar where you live That you can donate your dolls clothes to


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## shirleyoboe (Feb 21, 2012)

I'm so sorry....I know exactly how you feel!
Is this your son or daughter's child?

Have the same situation with my son and daughter-in-law...they really don't appreciate anything we do for them--at least, they don't show it!

It really hurts and there's no way to say it doesn't!

We've tried to change things but people are people and these relationships are so complex!


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## lil rayma (Mar 29, 2012)

I'm am so sorry for you, but please don't dwell on this one time. I'm sure there are many people who would love to receive a nice hand made gift from you. I have had similar experiences, as the one you described, and I have had to develop a tough skin. I now choose, carefully, who to give my hand made gifts to. There is no better feeling than to give to someone you know, or someone in need, and know that they really appreciate the gift. Even better when the say thank you or write a note. Chin up and knit on.


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## Brawny (Feb 2, 2014)

Oh, I feel the hurt. It is sad that grandkids don't appricate what you do for them. I would not give her anything for a while and see what she does. I do knitting for 2 of my granddaughters that are a Sr. in high school and a Sophmore in college and they can't wait till I make them something. They let me know when they get it and say "thanks gram."


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## kaaren (Feb 22, 2011)

I feel so bad for you. I knit AG for the little girl that lives next door and her two cousins. They are so excited when I make them something and I always get a pic or see them on their dolls. It makes one feel so good inside. My heart aches for you. Maybe someday your GD will come around. Donating is a great idea and there are so many little girls out there that would be thrilled to get something so special. Cheer up and keep knitting those clothes!!


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## disgo (Mar 2, 2013)

First Red Flag was you mentioning their visitation patterns (as my poor mother learned over the years). One hour to them might seem like "Are we there yet?" with all their friends being close and I bet they are constantly busy like most nowadays with smart phones and tablets and the computer games etc.

Second Red Flag is the fact that its an AG doll which have their own character specific clothes (as I understand it) since my relations don't have them but do have the Barbies and those punk looking dolls which they are giving away as they get more into sports etc.

Like many nowadays they consider handwork inferior to name brands or makers items since they have been all trained by us to be impressed with labels and not product. Exactly why I never had labels (irritating some customers) when doing my couture business long before the label/maker craze. Look at Addis for an example.

What you like making should not be a factor in what you give. My mother never knit anything for the family that didn't request it specifically and they all remember her for her cooking more since they didn't--now they all do and like things they despised as children--go figure!


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## blessedinMO (Mar 9, 2013)

headlemk said:


> You've got the right attitude. Buy some little dolls from GoodWill or a resale shop, knit some pretty clothes for them and give them to a needy child. THEN it will be very much appreciated.


And I realized that I could never get as excited about Ipods and ipads as those kids do...I can't expect them to get as excited about my knitting as I do. A different world.


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## gmarie (Feb 8, 2012)

lynncarol33 said:


> It does make you feel bad when your hard work isn't appreciated. You should have been thanked and shown gratitude. You have the right idea in getting some dolls and making them clothes for children who don't get much for Christmas. I'll bet they'll be happy about it!


I agree. Most children now days are not taught common courtesy. I love the idea of making doll clothes for dolls and giving to the less fortunate.


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## janettamargo (May 13, 2013)

You have a kind heart which is not appreciated by this family at the moment. Perhaps this will change in time. 
Go with plan B. There are still many little girls out there who will be thrilled with your generous gifts.


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## Dcsmith77 (Apr 18, 2011)

I don't want to add to your hurt; however, parents teach their children to appreciate a gift - any gift. One of those parents is your child, so...what did you teach him/her? Obviously, if they don't respect you (seldom visit) or your gifts, they are not deserving of them. Still you love them, so continue in the pattern you have established and save your knitting for someone else who will appreciate it. 

Meanwhile, you did have the fun of making the clothes. Have you thought of asking for them back so you could give them to someone who would like them? I think that I would do that since they probably won't even care that you want them back. Then they can go to someone who will enjoy them. Just be matter of fact about the request. "Since you don't want them, may I have them back?" and leave it at that.


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## jbandsma (Mar 6, 2011)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


You can probably find a lot of dolls in thrift stores. A make over would probably be appreciated by the doll, too.


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## Julianna P (Nov 18, 2013)

What you like making should not be a factor in what you give. My mother never knit anything for the family that didn't request it specifically and they all remember her for her cooking more since they didn't--now they all do and like things they despised as children--go figure![/quote]

That was going to be my response. Kids are very picky. Even as parents we are often surprised by what our children like and don't like. Who would think my 17 year old son couldn't get enough hand knit socks??? They don't have to match, he doesn't really care what the pattern is, he just likes wearing them. He has many mis matched pairs because I use up my odds and ends on his socks.

Ask you Granddaughter what she would like. She may really like an afghan. Ask her what colors, patterns etc. she wants. If she has been a part of the process, she will more likely appreciate it. Just because you really like it, doesn't mean she will.


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## DHobbit (Jan 11, 2014)

:-(


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## dragonfly7673 (May 13, 2014)

> That was going to be my response. Kids are very picky. Even as parents we are often surprised by what our children like and don't like. Who would think my 17 year old son couldn't get enough hand knit socks??? They don't have to match, he doesn't really care what the pattern is, he just likes wearing them. He has many mis matched pairs because I use up my odds and ends on his socks.
> 
> Ask you Granddaughter what she would like. She may really like an afghan. Ask her what colors, patterns etc. she wants. If she has been a part of the process, she will more likely appreciate it. Just because you really like it, doesn't mean she will.


I agree. My son is 17 and his favorite gifts over the years have been fleece blankets that my mom made for him. She made them when he was little so they aren't full size, and he still keeps them around, wraps in them on the couch watching tv or playing video games. He wants nothing to do with hats but then I realized it wasn't my knitting... it was hats. Turns out he loves fingerless gloves... I agree, maybe ask and make sure what is being made is what will be wanted.

that being said, for the original poster, I'm sorry for the hurt. I have known adults that have been thrilled by things I've made them, and I've known some that seem to not care at all. It's easy to tell then which ones to make things for in the future. But kids being kids, maybe give this one another chance down the road.


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## lil rayma (Mar 29, 2012)

Yes, I agree with those that say kids want special labels, certain styles, etc. But that is no excuse for a lack of common courtesy. Children should learn that their actions and words can hurt and that someday they may be at the other end of rudeness. Adult are not excused either. Many of them are just as bad. Very sad.


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## Colorgal (Feb 20, 2012)

I like your plan B. I would knit the clothes for bears of an average size and contact the police and fire departments. Many places they give the bears to traumatized kids. I think this would be great, a bear and clothes to play with.
And if your granddaughter asks later on. I would tell her the truth, you did not get a thank you so you knit for people that do.


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## bobctwn65 (Jul 27, 2012)

i found 5 18" dolls at thrift shop .$3.00 each, and in nice shape.


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## disgo (Mar 2, 2013)

lil rayma said:


> Yes, I agree with those that say kids want special labels, certain styles, etc. But that is no excuse for a lack of common courtesy. Children should learn that their actions and words can hurt and that someday they may be at the other end of rudeness. Adult are not excused either. Many of them are just as bad. Very sad.


From my vantage point of life my grandparents where raised with "No talking at the table" & asking to be excused from the table, and obligatory thank you notes that were (gasp) 1 cent postmarked and sent via US Mail. Their children after suffering their War were "Dr. Spock says", elbows on the table for Thanksgiving (other wise TV diner stands) and obligatory thank you notes sent to those you liked at 5 cents through the US Mail. My generation was "To Hell With War", what table--just any seat in the TV area will do and definitely no TV stands and just love your children with "Now say thank you" with the giver present and postage 25 cents via USPS (Thank You cards a small section at the bottom of the card display). Next generation with wars every year,"If you don't come eat and put that video game controller down" with some at table (because they didn't like what program was being watched on TV) and others in TV area, and throw the mail in the trash delivered by USPS (two selections of thank you cards and blank cards in one tiny section of the aisles of cards). Now its a new war every day, its send text message "Diner!" and maybe some will stumble in that haven't eaten already and are too busy with tablets, computers etc. to be bothered and what need is there for thank you when they didn't get what they really wanted which was a pair of $500 dollar tenies they would scuff or out grow in a week & besides you haven't been keeping up with their Facebook accounts or their #tweets _grans came thru_, USPS--do they still deliver "mail", "Thank You cards! We don't stock those anymore--you might want to try our online store" . Just like when my sister asked where the crinkled French fries where at COSTCO, "Oh! Those are out of season" :-o :shock: :?: :!:


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## run4fittness (May 22, 2011)

That is horrible! Just found out one of the nieces loves the doll clothes I have sent her and wants to ask me to make more but doesn't want to take advantage! She lives in Texas if you want to adopt her as an "honorary" niece!

Yes, there will be other girls out there who will love your knitting.


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## mamamiaow (Sep 10, 2012)

I'm sorry your work wasn't appreciated. I agree that you can get a knockoff AG doll at Walmart and dress her for another little girl. Our church has a Christmas angel project where you choose a name and fill a little bag with gifts for the child. Some little girl would be thrilled, I'm sure! My daughter has been real good about making sure the kids say thank you, but then they ASKED for my hats and scarves last Christmas!


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## bakrmom (May 30, 2011)

You don't say how old your GD is but"I haven't looked at them " is not necessarily a rejection. It's summertime. Kids are playing outside not playing indoors with dolls etc.


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

Oh I am so sorry. I know exactly how sad you are feeling. 
It HURTS so deep down inside.

I no longer knit for GD. She doesn't appreciate anything. nor does the DIL (her Mom).
I knit for charity. I buy dolls at Goodwill. Give them a bath and a new hair do. And them make clothes. I donate the dolls at holidays. I bet these dolls find loving homes.

Family's can be soooooo cruel.

Sending a HUG.


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## settermom (Dec 19, 2012)

Oh dear. How well I understand your situation and hurt feelings. Have "been there, done that" myself many times over the years with my own kids/grand kids. Your "alternative"idea is exactly what I would suggest --- and have done myself. Knit for charity, for needy school kids, for a neighbor child who might be special to you, etc. That way you keep right on knitting and being productive and hopefully making someone else (anyone one else --- kin or not kin) happy. The love and devotion that goes into your handiwork WILL be valued by someone else at some known, or unknown, point in time and and that will be gratitude and appreciation enough for your heart to enjoy.


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## jbandsma (Mar 6, 2011)

bakrmom said:


> You don't say how old your GD is but"I haven't looked at them " is not necessarily a rejection. It's summertime. Kids are playing outside not playing indoors with dolls etc.


I don't remember ever as a kid, or with my own kids having them get something in the mail or as a gift of any kind and not immediately wanting to see what it was. Have kids changed that much? (Youngest is 42.)


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## scumbugusa (Oct 10, 2011)

Mighy I suggest that you knit for teddy bears. Little boys need toys too.

I have been and still am in a similar situation as you. It hurts and I am sorry you are hurting xx


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## 29426 (Jul 26, 2011)

NY Hummer said:


> oh, how heart-breaking ~
> what a shame that she didn't love her teddy bear just because he wasn't perfect anymore.....
> and didn't even think of how much love you put into getting it back together - take a photo of him, save it for her - years later she may wish she had her Teddy back.


Next time she comes read The Velveteen Rabbit.


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## Jessica-Jean (Mar 14, 2011)

When our daughter was - briefly - playing with dolls, I knitted an entire outfit for one of them as a Christmas present - hat, sweater, coat, dress, pants, booties. It was not appreciated at all. When the next Christmas rolled around, I gave the doll and outfit to a charity for distribution to a needy girl. Can't do _that_ anymore. Only new-in-unwrapped-package gifts are acceptable these days. :thumbdown:


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## chooksnpinkroses (Aug 23, 2012)

Phoebe's Mother said:


> Wonderful and loving "therapy"! I think your Plan B is a really nice one!


:thumbup: :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## kiwiannie (Jul 30, 2011)

If i was you i would stick with plan b,where you know what you have made is truely appreciated.


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## dribla (Nov 14, 2011)

Oh you seem to be a kind and loving person. I also knit for my granddaughters, but very rarely see them in anything included dresses etc, that I have sewn. I feel sad but I love knitting and sewing so now will give them away to the needy.


Di


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## Aunty M (Jul 7, 2014)

We've all been in a similar situation and it is hurtful. In my case, I learned to only knit them items after I'd asked if they liked the idea. If they don't want it I get them to tell me what they'd like me to knit. I know they didn't mean to hurt my feelings by rejecting my idea, and they always love what I make them. Everything else I like to knit goes to others who like it. Hope it helps to know you are not alone.


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## Kooka (Sep 1, 2011)

We all have some people in our families who cannot show gratitude. Feel good that you did the right thing. I had a similar experience after buying an item for an ungrateful step daughter. She let the world know her father and I are not her favourite people because others give her money. It doesn't hurt any more. There are other family members who appreciate us, and truly love us.


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## Valjean (Jul 21, 2011)

Great back up plan...


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## lindakaren12 (Dec 16, 2011)

Sounds like a great Plan B


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## dribla (Nov 14, 2011)

I have found that my great nephew only accepts money as he has told me, no body gives him what he wants. He is a spoilt person, who does not appreciate anything. this last birthday I gave him $30 as that is all I can afford now, and he replied ' is that all' ungrateful little so and so

Di


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## jonibee (Nov 3, 2011)

Children learn from the example set by their parents, they're not born rude or without manners. I wouldn't knit any more things for this grandaughter as she doesn't know how to appreciate it (at least at this stage in her life) . Save yourself hurt feelings and do it for yourself or someone who does appreciate fine work.


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## dribla (Nov 14, 2011)

I agree, actually thinking about it the little boys mother, and uncles are and always have been spoilt. I will help the people who would like my knitting.

Di


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## owlet (Aug 18, 2013)

Firstly, not all little girls like dolls! My sister and I didn't and my niece and 2 great-nieces don't either. By giving dolls (pretend babies?) to girls you are implying that their mission in life is to have children, why wouldn't you also give dolls to little boys? Secondly, if you really must knit dolls' clothes, how do you know what size to do? 
You could reclaim your dolls' clothes and give them to a premature baby unit where they will be used and appreciated.


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## Thatbella (Jan 9, 2013)

My heart goes out to all the Grandparents who are obviously not appreciated or cherished.
The saddest part of your story is the fact they only live one hour away and you only see them a couple of times a year.
I am very lucky to have most of mine with me but I have some that live three hours away and I still see them at least once a month.
They always appreciate what I knit for them and even ask me to make things. 
Do your knitting for someone that appreciates it - and appreciates you.


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## sheila kay (Jan 2, 2013)

sorry that you have been treated like this after making all these lovely things. Knit by all means but send them to charity places or church fete etc, I am sure someone will love them in future.


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## Charann102 (Apr 26, 2014)

I'm so sorry! A child is clueless but her parents should have taught her how to respond and explained how special this gift was. Maybe they are just as insensitive since they live only an hour away and don't come to visit. Yes, spend your time knitting for the less fortunate. Consider this a life lesson and move on. I know that is easier said then done.


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## inishowen (May 28, 2011)

I don't blame the little girl for what she said. Children don't know about little white lies, they just tell the truth. She probably isn't into dolls any more. If you're knitting for charity it would be nice to buy a doll (maybe from a thrift shop) and dress it.


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## peggypat (Apr 3, 2013)

Love Plan B. You can always buy the AG type dolls at Joan's and Michael's with your coupons, get them really cheap, and donate them to a good cause. Know what you mean, I dont knit for my granddaughters anymore, unless they ask and their mother buys the yarn. Keep up the good work, you can always find others who appreciate your talent.


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## jeannietta (Mar 14, 2011)

I put up a similar post a few months ago and was shocked at how many people responded. My experience has been with non-family members who do not acknowledge gifts. I decided to knit for myself and my immediate family only. I join in charity projects in my knitting circle. I think you should tell the parents about this conversation with our granddaughter. They need to teach her manners. Immediately upon receiving a gift she should thank you. Sometimes children receive too many things from doting relatives but that is not an excuse for rude behavior. You will be doing her a favor in the long run.


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## Thatbella (Jan 9, 2013)

I am in Sydney and not familiar with the term "AG" doll - forgot to ask before.


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## peggypat (Apr 3, 2013)

Sorry. American Girl type Doll, or 18 inch doll


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## grandmatimestwo (Mar 30, 2011)

I'm sorry your feelings were hurt. I do agree that it is the parents job to teach the children about appreciation for gifts, and also about how not to hurt peoples' feelings. I'm sure there are many children who will love your gifts and be very thankful!


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## God's Girl (Jan 29, 2013)

I am so sorry that your GD hurt your feelings but making the clothes for someone who needs it is a great idea. I don't know if you have a Micheal's store near you but they sell a very similar doll and if you get a 40% off coupon they end up costing about $12.00. I have also found some dolls in the thrift shop for even less. Just a thought. Keep on knitting there are many who would love to have what you make.


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## sylviaelliott (May 11, 2011)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


if you like knitting 'little' outfits, why don't you knit for your local baby unit. they much appreciate anything you give them. I know how you feel. my son and family live 50 miles away and I see them once or twice a year. no good visiting them as they are always out doing something or other. don't think I have seen my DIL for about 18 months and really don't know anything about my granddaughters. I gave up on gifts and send them cheques for birthdays and Christmas which are never acknowledged. ah me.


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## sandra7 (Dec 6, 2012)

I know the feeling as I used to knit for my grandchildren but it was the son-in-law that put the things I knit into the bin also any toys we bought them. I gave up buying and making them anything in the end.


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## roseknit (Apr 2, 2011)

If I were you I would never make anything for her again. I have a motto, Snub me once, but you,ll never snub me twice. In the end they will be the losers not you.


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## StellasKnits (Apr 10, 2011)

That stinks. I'm lucky that family loves what I make for them and even puts their orders in! lol...however, that may be the key. Make what they want rather than what you think they might want. My oldest grandson and daughter have already put in their orders for hats. My daughter mistakenly washed/dried a wool hat I made for her and begged for another because she loved the first one. My 4 year old grandson told me the other day he "needs" a new skeleton hat, a pumpkin hat and a new earflap hat for the fall. Warms my heart!

When my daughter was little, my mom used to have the most gorgeous frilly dresses made for her. She got the age eventually where she didn't really like the frilly dresses and my mom got her feelings hurt. I suggested that she take my daughter with her to the fabric store and let her pick out the pattern and fabric. They had the best time planning prom and home coming dresses when my daughter was in high school. My daughter and her now husband went to the VMI ring dance. She had the most unique dress there - it was all white with sparkly flames coming off the bottom. Even the other cadets there commented that it was an awesome dress! The key here - she made it something they could do and plan together.


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## eggplantlady (Apr 10, 2011)

I would say something to her (in a very friendly tone) like "Since you don't play with the items why don't you give them back to me and I'll pass them on to someone else?" She may then realize that the items have value. If she doesn't play with dolls then she won't care about giving them up; if she does...


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## mrleese (May 25, 2013)

I completely understand how you feel. I made a sweater, hat, booties and a blanket for each of my grandchildren when they were born. Unfortunately only 2 grandchildren ever wore the items I made and probably just for a picture to send to me and I have 7 grandchildren. The last one I made, my granddaughter is now 1 year old. I asked her mother when she was 6 months old if she ever wore the outfit, her reply was, oh I forgot I had that!


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## Medieval Reenactor (Sep 3, 2013)

I was the parent of a girl who HATED dolls - she had a pony, a lamb, and 2 big dogs to play with. But her paternal GM *insisted* on buying her dolls every year. One year she had a handmade doll sewn for my DD that was customized with DD's blue eyes, blonde hair, etc. - it was beautiful. But I found it stomped into the floor. When I scolded her, she angrily said, "I've TOLD Nana I don't like dolls! If she can't listen and give me something I like, I don't have to like it!" (Luckily, GM lived 1500 miles away at the time so she never learned of the disrespect her lovely doll received.) 

It was years later that I learned my MIL had lost her mother when she was very young and had never had a doll. We started giving HER dolls for gifts - the fashion doll sort.


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## jmai5421 (May 6, 2011)

NY Hummer said:


> Feel so badly for you -
> it's so hard to put your heart into something, and it seems that it's not cared about ~
> Perhaps she's just not *into* dolls right now? I know some girls develop a love for dolls at a very young age, others don't until they are in school, while some don't think about dolls til they get to the Barbie, etc. age.
> That's a wonderful idea to knit outfits for Christmas gifts to make some little girl squeal with delight! Our stores have Angel trees at the holiday season, you choose a name and there are ideas of what the child is wishing for - so I know you will make a little girl very excited on Christmas morning!
> ...


You are right. I have 4 granddaughters that have AG dolls but only 2 of them actually play with their dolls. I sew and knit for those two and for charity.
Also so many kids have so many structured activities that they do not have play time at home.
Yes, don't give up on her.


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## jbandsma (Mar 6, 2011)

Jessica-Jean said:


> When our daughter was - briefly - playing with dolls, I knitted an entire outfit for one of them as a Christmas present - hat, sweater, coat, dress, pants, booties. It was not appreciated at all. When the next Christmas rolled around, I gave the doll and outfit to a charity for distribution to a needy girl. Can't do _that_ anymore. Only new-in-unwrapped-package gifts are acceptable these days. :thumbdown:


But children's wards at hospitals are always happy to have donations like that. Our local children's shelter is always asking for things to brighten a child's life. Maybe your area has something similar?


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## chinalake66 (Sep 21, 2013)

I know how you feel. I have given up on knitting for my own grandchildren because of lack of appreciation, but I knit doll clothes and baby clothes endlessly for craft fairs - where they are appreciated (mostly!) AC Moore also has inexpensive 18" Springfield dolls ($22.95 usually, but often on sale at half price - or available at a discounted price with a coupon). I have had more fun "playing with dolls" than I have had for years, so keep on knitting - some little girls will be thrilled with your work!


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## Karenno1 (Mar 17, 2014)

My love don't be upset ...you have done a lovely thing for your family and don't beat yourself up about it .its the day and age of technology ,computer games and I want kids , and I'll get parents ....my family and grandchildren are the same ....so dust yourself off put your art to work and bring a smile to some little ones who have nothing ...  :thumbup:


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## lildeb2 (Jul 14, 2013)

It does hurt when you work hard on making outfits and get no thanks for it. I like your idea!! :thumbup:


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## lil rayma (Mar 29, 2012)

I understand that some little girls may not care to play with dolls, but I see this as no excuse for not appreciating the thought that was put into the gift, and saying thank you. If children are too young to understand this, then the parents should take this opportunity to explain, and to teach the child manners. After all, they will need good manners their whole life, so why not start now.


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## Karen M1 (Aug 15, 2011)

My adult grandson told me that he doesn't like "Homemade" things so do not make me anymore! A few months later he was asking me to make him a scarf that he saw in a pricey store at the mall. I no longer make things for him and his family. I am in the process of making afghans for all of my grandchildren Guess who is not gonna get one?


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## cathbeasle (Jun 8, 2012)

Know exactly how you feel. It does hurt. Do for those who appreciate it.


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## Pleclerrc (Apr 17, 2011)

You are not alone. Although my granddaughters appreciated my knitting efforts when they were small, now that they are older they prefer going to the mall where they can shop and select their own clothes and accessories. ?Two of my friend's children, and grandchildren, don't acknowledge her gorgeous knitting or beading projects and toss them in the junk or give away. They continue to knit and bead but stash them until finding someone who does appreciate them. Rather then give to unknown sources, they wait to find someone who likes what they do and then surprise them with a wrapped gift. It may be someone they meet at a library, church or gathering, dental technician with children (nurse, mailman, grocery checkout gal, neighbor with grandchildren etc.) . Amazing how total strangers appreciate the love and time spent on hand-made presents. This way, they continue to do what they enjoy and also see the pleasure it brings others. Never know when they need a gift on short notice. You can also post them for sale on KP. Keep on knitting and enjoy your pleasure.


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## GrammieGail (Jun 10, 2011)

My sister knits for Barbie Dolls...she asked at church if anyone had "naked Barbies" that were thrown in a corner, she would love to have them. She makes the clothes, dresses the naked Barbies, and gives them to Charity. She got TONS of naked Barbies!!! I am sure you could get the same result if you asked for 18" dolls...and yard sales are a great resource, too. Bless your heart...yes, there are PLENTY of little girls out there who will LOVE them!! HUGS...GG


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## Pleclerrc (Apr 17, 2011)

sockyarn said:


> It is the parents that teach the children to be that way. Yes use your time to make something that will be wanted.


Yes, parents set the tone of how children receive gifts. If parents respond with gratitude, so do the children. If parents blow them off as "nothing," so do the children. Sometimes we want to shake our own grown children and ask if they were raised by wolves.


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## Pleclerrc (Apr 17, 2011)

Unnh Unhh, I'd never knit an afghan that takes such a long time to make and use lots of yarn for someone who didn't appreciate a smaller project (doll clothes). What a mistake that would be!! It would surely be on the floor, in the garbage in short time, or in the washing machine and dryer for sure - if ever used. Only Knit for others who appreciate your effort, time and talent . It's a lesson learned by hundreds on KP.


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## Pleclerrc (Apr 17, 2011)

Lee, thanks for sharing your lesson learned. I'll bet others are so happy due to your kindness. We can all learn from you.


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## simslyn (Apr 28, 2011)

I feel your pain, Debbie! As my 3 granddaughters were born, I knit countless sweaters, dresses, skirts for them. The oldest girl, Keena, told me "they are too hot". Mommy used to take pictures of the girls in their gifts. She doesn't even bother with that anymore. So now I don't knit for them. Just knit for myself.

Lyn in NC


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## SouthernGirl (Dec 28, 2011)

oh that is a hurtful thing. I'm so sorry you went through that.


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## Aud (Feb 1, 2011)

Debbie, Not to change the subject, but I LOVE your dog. What a sweetheart!!!!


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## Donna M. (Oct 1, 2013)

There are so many places that you can donate your wonderful hard work. Donating them to various charities is such a rewarding experience. You would be surprised how much need there is out there. Just making hats for the Veterans and homeless makes me feel like I am doing something worthwhile. After my cousin and I, do a "drop" to the various places, we go to lunch. We wonder if our Aunt Bea (who taught us how to knit) is looking down and smiling at what she started. Find a place that will be grateful.


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## taborhills (Sep 8, 2012)

cevers said:


> A lot of us have received similar reactions to our knitted offerings, and we sympathize with you and your feelings. Your plans to continue knitting doll clothes for children who want and need them is admirable and will be fulfilling for you. Carry on!


Cevers, I like your rust and blue top (worn with the fur neckpiece!). Do you have the pattern for the top or can you tell me where it is?


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## cgcharles (Feb 23, 2011)

I know your pain very well. My son and daughter-in-law are two of the most unappreciative people ever. And they are teaching(by example) their children the same thing. I got to the point I stopped making for them at all. 

Now my grandchildren by my first son are totally different. They love the home made items, wear them and send their friends for me to make them hats and such. Different parents, different upbringing and different attitudes.


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## JusNeedles (Nov 20, 2011)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


Sounds like we have the same relatives; my grandchildren live about an hour away but I only see them when I go there. NOW on the other hand, my GD wouldn't be caught dead with an AG doll, NOR, in anything I knit for her so I don't bother. I agree, knit for those that don't have much and would appreciate it. Rather than knitting for my grandchildren, I knit hats, scarves, mittens for local charities !


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## .79315 (Dec 5, 2012)

When I was small I was an intense child and at that time dolls had molded heads and hair and did not do anything, (not even blink their eyes). I had no interest in dolls, they were too boring and I was much too busy. Todays dolls are so much more but in this world of electronic toys they do not always command the attention they did when our parents were children. Barbie endures but the rest come and go like water down the drain. I would make doll clothes but every year their is a "new rage" doll. I confine my doll clothes making for Barbie.


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## Madison7 (Aug 22, 2012)

I have knitted doll clothes for all my GD. But the one that really hurts is the knitted coats I made for them when they were about 5 yrs old. When I found the one coat in the entry hallway being trampled on like a rug, I knew I was finished knitting for that family. This too is a son and DIL and never a thank you. Had made darling fingerless mitts to match. (Easter coat) Oh well, there are others that appreciate it. I continue to knit for all the others. My GS (15) asked for a pair of socks. Loves them.


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## TapestryArtist (Sep 4, 2013)

Sometimes I think it's part of the "separating" process gone wrong! Children naturally separate from their parents, and some do not do it well..... they reject things their parents think and do and then pass that attitude along to their kids. Don't waste your breath, money, time, talent, any longer. Do what you enjoy for those who can appreciate it.


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## SharonM (Nov 25, 2011)

This is the reason I don't knit for my grandchildren.... never a thank you, never an expression of appreciation. When they were small, I blamed their parents (my son) for not teaching them the basics, and I still do.... but they aren't small any more.... and the things you don't learn at home, you learn in the outside world - from other people. It's not just my knitting... it's everything... birthday checks, Christmas gifts... never a thank you. I've considered not participating in their lives anymore - they're a thousand miles away, I don't see them, they don't call. Truly, they are virtual strangers. I'd rather show my generosity to those who appreciate it. Does this make me a bad person?


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## Dlclose (Jun 26, 2011)

susanrs1 said:


> Don't waste your time on her any more and go with your plan b. Kids who don't get much appreciate everything. Your talents are being wasted right now. I've been there with unappreciative people and believe me, no more.
> 
> I feel bad for you because I know exactly how it feels - no kids or grandkids but knitted enough for other people who don't appreciate it. Stick with people who love your work, you will feel much better.


I am in the same boat! My DD equates handmade things with being poor. So nothing but Baby Gap stuff for her daughter! Spent a lot of HOT time knitting a cute red/whit/blue skirt for her for the 4th. She wouldn't put it on my GD who is almost 3 now. So, I will knit for my great niece. Or just for the pregnancy center, where teens often find themselves in difficult situations with no help. Our knitting group did knit hats and scarves for the Homeless group
our church helps. They were very appreciative!!


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## inishowen (May 28, 2011)

roseknit said:


> If I were you I would never make anything for her again. I have a motto, Snub me once, but you,ll never snub me twice. In the end they will be the losers not you.


Please remember she is just a little girl. She didn't snub her grandmother. She just told the truth.


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## azmoonbugs (Dec 2, 2011)

It would appear that either your granddaughter has too many toys, too many other things to do or has decided that handmade is not cool.


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## Gweneth 1946 (May 20, 2012)

As someone has already said people/children can be cruel. If its not advertised on or in style they do not want them. And it is also the atmosphere at home and in school. Many children/people are followers. I have one grandson, now 13, who will hardly open his mouth unless he is asked a question, very shy outside of home, but if he needs something sewn like a stuffed toy or a hole in his pants he will ask his mother (my daughter) if Grammy (me) could sew it up because his mother always brings their clothes to me for repairs. It does give you a nice warm fuzzy feeling when someone appreciates what you can do, but it is the rare child who recognizes this. Give to those in need their are plenty of them out there.


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## KittyMomma (Dec 12, 2012)

I can relate to your feelings. I taught all my kids proper manners but it doesn't seem to have been passed on to some of the grands. 

Your idea of doing for children in need is right on. You can share your love of knitting and bring some happiness in to a young life that needs some love. I have seen many of the 18 inch dolls at places like Wal-Mart, Target, etc. Especially around Christmas. Nancy Zeiman also has them on her website. 

I don't know about where you live, but one place where I lived the Salvation Army would provide us with dolls (used) that we would make a wardrobe for and then return to be gifted to a needy child at Christmas. Ask around, bet you end up with more dolls than you can dress alone.


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## 13068 (Mar 23, 2011)

I feel for you. But I love your idea of knitting for children who have nothing. Don't forget the little boys too - knitting hats and scarves for cold children is also very rewarding.


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## yanagi (Jul 7, 2013)

How sad. I do understand the feeling. Your idea of dolls for unfortunate children is great. See if you can't get some help from a local church or other charity to buy the dolls.


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## janis blondel (May 20, 2011)

That's not nice, her parents should have made sure that she thanked you, a homemade card would have been a nice touch, manners are sooooo important. I think your idea of making dolls clothes for more underprivileged children is a nice one.


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## Donsdotter (Jun 27, 2014)

I have a friend who knit a blanket for her daughter. My friend is a beautiful knitter. Where did she find the blanket when visiting her grown daughter? IN THE DOG HOUSE outside!!!! Needless to say she knits nothing ever again for that daughter. Sadly family can really take our knitting for granted. I think your plan B is really the good one!! Maybe you will inspire a child somewhere to knit as well!!!


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## mamiepooh (Sep 19, 2011)

Phoebe's Mother said:


> Wonderful and loving "therapy"! I think your Plan B is a really nice one!


My opinion too.


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## Elder Ellen (Mar 9, 2013)

Maybe she just doesn't care much for dolls. I was more of a tom-boy, and I didn't really appreciate them -- never could understand why people kept giving me dolls and such things when all I really wanted was a train, ball bat, pop-gun or something else that was considered to be "boys' only". I did get some of my boy cousins' hand-me-downs and I loved them.


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## Mirjam (Jun 9, 2014)

Plan B sounds wonderful! You will make a lot of girls very happy!


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## imsobusy (Oct 16, 2013)

Oh no, that's too bad. It's a shame she didn't seem to appreciate them. I like your alternate plan.


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## Lovinknittin (Apr 2, 2011)

headlemk said:


> You've got the right attitude. Buy some little dolls from GoodWill or a resale shop, knit some pretty clothes for them and give them to a needy child. THEN it will be very much appreciated.


Target has beautiful dolls. Do what you love to do - knit doll's clothes. They are not easy to knit, either.


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## fibermcgivver (Dec 18, 2012)

Debbie: I went through that experience when my GD was little... (now 18). It appeared that I was far more interested in her AG doll than she was when she told me I could take it home because I would take better care of it than she would... :XD: I remember as a child being so interested in dolls.... Well, I enjoyed making the outfits for the dolls anyway.. Another GD turns 3 in December; maybe SHE will like dolls  Every child is such an individual, aren't they? Your sure came up with a great plan B!


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## Lovinknittin (Apr 2, 2011)

Might be a good idea to tell the parents, in a NICE way, that this little girl whom you all love, could be told about appreciation and thank yous. That is one of life's lessons and she will be better if she learns compassion and appreciation. Good luck, not easy to tell them but worthwhile. Say you want her to be liked by nice people.


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## malfrench (Apr 7, 2011)

When my GD snubbed the 2 sweaters I made her, I told here to give them to a friend or the Salvation Army and that I would not knit for her again. I plan to stick to that. Her dad, who does appreciate my knitting will get the time spent on him.


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## czechmate (Jun 17, 2011)

you don't know how people will react to your gifts and I found out the hard way too,so now I knit for myself much happier.


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## sundrop016 (Mar 19, 2013)

I would stop knitting for her. My oldest GD asked me to make her a blanket and she gave me the colors, she was about 7 yrs old then. Today she is 10, she doesn't use the blanket and I'm doubting that she ever did. I stopped knitting for her. My daughter did the same thing. I knitted an Elmo sweater when she was pregnant, found out it went into the attic and never on the grandkids back.


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## NellieKnitter (Sep 10, 2012)

NY Hummer said:


> Feel so badly for you -
> it's so hard to put your heart into something, and it seems that it's not cared about ~
> Perhaps she's just not *into* dolls right now? I know some girls develop a love for dolls at a very young age, others don't until they are in school, while some don't think about dolls til they get to the Barbie, etc. age.
> That's a wonderful idea to knit outfits for Christmas gifts to make some little girl squeal with delight! Our stores have Angel trees at the holiday season, you choose a name and there are ideas of what the child is wishing for - so I know you will make a little girl very excited on Christmas morning!
> ...


Some girls are never into dolls although, they may have dolls because mom thinks all girls should have dolls. I think girls like to dress their dolls in the same styles of clothing they are wearing--especially matching clothing. Show her pictures and ask what she would like. Girls are very picky about how they dress their dolls as well as themselves. But I blame your granddaughter's mother for not teaching her manners--don't blame the child!


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## Abi_marsden (Aug 5, 2012)

People can be so utterly rude,did there parents teach them no manners? I'd have to say something to the parents.im sorry for me and there rudeness.


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## NellieKnitter (Sep 10, 2012)

SharonM said:


> This is the reason I don't knit for my grandchildren.... never a thank you, never an expression of appreciation. When they were small, I blamed their parents (my son) for not teaching them the basics, and I still do.... but they aren't small any more.... and the things you don't learn at home, you learn in the outside world - from other people. It's not just my knitting... it's everything... birthday checks, Christmas gifts... never a thank you. I've considered not participating in their lives anymore - they're a thousand miles away, I don't see them, they don't call. Truly, they are virtual strangers. I'd rather show my generosity to those who appreciate it. Does this make me a bad person?


No, you are not a bad person, just a hurt and unappreciated mother and grandmother. It is sad and their loss.


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## NellieKnitter (Sep 10, 2012)

inishowen said:


> Please remember she is just a little girl. She didn't snub her grandmother. She just told the truth.


I agree! Children are honest and say what they think!


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## cbjlinda (May 25, 2011)

I really like your plan two I can see the happy smiles and tears nowwwwwwww.


Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


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## nmclaire (Mar 15, 2013)

I understand how you feel. It's hard to have your items rejected. I've made an afgan for my daughter and baby clothes for her children and never saw them used or worn. I just do not make anything for her anymore. I made items for my other daughter and she loves and uses them all.


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## whitetail (Feb 19, 2011)

So sorry, but your plan B is a great one.


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## Valanteen (Sep 28, 2011)

I crochet three strawberry shortcake outfits for my great grand daughters ages 6 months, 3 years, and 5 years. This included hats, leggings, jackets and skirts for each age, novelty hats like my little pony, pink panther, etc. i am not sure they ever wore them except for the picture I asked for. You can bet I wont do that again. I sell those outfits at $75 each so not getting much more than a nod hurt my feelings. I know exactly how you feel.


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## Carmela51 (Jan 12, 2013)

I applaud you for taking the higher road. Somewhere out there are children who will appreciate your time and your dedication . I was one of those children who benefited from the kindness of strangers and I can tell you that it has made me a better adult. I am now on the other side of all that so as the the late Maya Angelou stated, "when you get, you give." Thank you for giving.


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## bizzyknitter (May 10, 2011)

I know just how you feel, been there. Don't blame the child, blame the parents.


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## cullenbe (Jul 3, 2011)

I hear you. I will be donating some to the Children's Hospital. It takes 15 to 20 hrs. To make one outfit and when I give one, that is what they are told.


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## Knitter1931 (Nov 10, 2011)

I guess I am more fortunate. I have 9 grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren. So far they all have worn and passed down knitting and crocheted items through the years, as well as our children have. My needles are busy most of the time. One great grandson that I knit a sweater for when he was two sleeps with it as it is "soft". He is now 4. Our youngest granddaughter is getting married next month. For her shower I made the Magic Potholders and knitted dish rags for the prizes. Her friends "all in their 20's were so happy to get these". I also have a sweater that my grandmother made for me when I was 8 years old that I loved.


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## Debsy (Oct 15, 2012)

Aud said:


> Debbie, Not to change the subject, but I LOVE your dog. What a sweetheart!!!!


Thank you. We love her too. Gracie (Grace of God brought her to us) is from the shelter. She's 10 now and doesn't bark and never stops wagging her tail! Alot of children could learn from our dear 4 legged friends. Your little ones are precious too. 
Debbie


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## Knitter1931 (Nov 10, 2011)

I guess I am more fortunate. I have 9 grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren. So far they all have worn and passed down knitting and crocheted items through the years, as well as our children have. My needles are busy most of the time. One great grandson that I knit a sweater for when he was two sleeps with it as it is "soft". He is now 4. Our youngest granddaughter is getting married next month. For her shower I made the Magic Potholders and knitted dish rags for the prizes. Her friends "all in their 20's were so happy to get these". I also have a sweater that my grandmother made for me when I was 8 years old that I loved.


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## Knitter1931 (Nov 10, 2011)

Sorry sent this twice......


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## nancyk (Aug 2, 2011)

It's not only the children who break your heart when you knit or crochet something, it's the adults, too.
I don't make things for people anymore unless I know exactly what they want and they admire something I have made. Recently , I made a lacy poncho which made me look like a refugee from the Vienna Boys Choir. It was far too young looking for me.
Then the daughter (15 years old) of a friend just loved it and asked if I could make her one. I gave it to her.


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## granniegoose77 (Sep 22, 2012)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


I feel your pain! Happened to me, too. No matter how much love you put into your handmade gifts, if they are not appreciated (by unthinking, rude folks), you can get your feelings hurt. Put your talents to better use by giving to someone who needs or at least "begs" for your handywork.


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## Finnsbride (Feb 8, 2011)

I understand your hurt. When we reach out with love, it is painful to be ignored. The idea of knitting for those who will appreciate the doll clothes and you is a great one.


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## Debsy (Oct 15, 2012)

Thank you to everyone who has responded to my post. I feel so much better knowing I'm not the only one who has unappreciative family members. After many years of trying to please them I'm anxious to do Christmas packages for children who are needy...you gals are just wonderful and have become my friends! Thanks again and God bless all of you.


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## granniegoose77 (Sep 22, 2012)

nancyk said:


> It's not only the children who break your heart when you knit or crochet something, it's the adults, too.
> I don't make things for people anymore unless I know exactly what they want and they admire something I have made. Recently , I made a lacy poncho which made me look like a refugee from the Vienna Boys Choir. It was far too young looking for me.
> Then the daughter (15 years old) of a friend just loved it and asked if I could make her one. I gave it to her.


I know this made you feel good! I love it when this happens.


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## sharon05676 (May 13, 2012)

I feel your pain! It's not your grand daughter, it's her parents. Move on with plan b. Hopefully you can spend some time with your GD and get some input on something she might like, maybe help you pick out a pattern. Good luck and spread the love.


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## panddgon (May 8, 2011)

I've experienced this more than once!! It's gotten to where I refuse to knit anything for babies. There are so many cute baby patterns but I won't even look anymore!! There are plenty of other things to make for people who really appreciate it!


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## redquilter (Jun 24, 2011)

Sometimes our kids just have too much and they never really appreciate things. I think you have made a wonderful, generous decision to knit for a little girl in need.


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## yona (Feb 7, 2011)

lynnlassiter said:


> good for you! WalMart sells their brand of "AG"dolls for $20. Maybe you findsome some in good condition at the thrift stores.


I recently moved to the Bronx, NY where I'm learning what's where including the neighboring Westchester area where I've been keeping my eyes open for 'thrift shops' as I'd like to find dolls & other craft items that I can make for charity. If anyone knows of any good thrift shops, please let me know.


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## yona (Feb 7, 2011)

I feel so bad for you and understand your hurt feelings. Kids today have so much ready made doll clothes and accessories that a hand made item is just another item to sit in a drawer. 

That is why I decided to knit more for charity and I make what ever I like and there's always someone who needs what I've made.

I'm new in my area (Bronx, NY) and am looking for thrift shops here or in the Westchester area so I can get dolls & other items to repurpose to make for children who don't have much.


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## Mayberry (Apr 10, 2014)

I think kids now days just aren't taught to send thank you note or even a phone call. I send my son money as he is grown. I used to know he received the check only after it showed up on my bank statement. One year I didn't send a check. When he called me to inquire what happened, I told him since he didn't acknowledge or thank me for the money I wasn't sending any until he could start showing some appreciation. Problem solved for me. If you make clothes and dolls for under privileged children, you will know your gift is appreciated.


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## beejay (May 27, 2011)

I don't knit for family at all anymore as it was totally unappreciated. I worked as a volunteer one year at Good Will cleaning dolls that had been donated. They were cleaned thoroughly and sold at very reasonable prices. I'm sure some child would love to receive one wearing a pretty outfit you made.


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## jennifer57 (Jan 27, 2011)

i know the feeling. I have been knitting for charity for years now. I made my sister a blanket from scrap yarn took me for ever to make it. I gave it to her and she never uses it. I think that young people don't appreciate the amount of time that goes into a project. Maybe while school is out or on a weekend when you have time go get her and teach her to knit, then she would appreciate items more.


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## Altaskier (Apr 18, 2013)

The ones closest to us can hurt us the most. Knit for people who need it. You are a good person.


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## Gran O'Malley (Jul 19, 2014)

Dear One, I also have made so many items about which I have no response from the receiver. I'm so happy you brought up this topic, since I believe we probably all or most have to deal with our feelings when this happens.

Your posting has helped me a lot, and also have the great replies you've received. I feel cheered up, and can ponder the bigger picture, and remember all the love I have put into every stitch. And that love doesn't dissipate! Your donations to charity are a blessing for you, your own family circle, and the recipients. And all the rest of us, vicariously.


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## Montana Gramma (Dec 19, 2012)

Can the GDs age be taken into consideration, did mom or dad help her with these gifts? I myself would talk to the parents, if she does not want them get them back and use for plan b.


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## mamanacy (Dec 16, 2013)

I blame this lack of manners and lack of appreciation on the parents. Children learn from their parents and unfortunately even though one of the parents is your child they do not teach their children like we did ours. Sad but true. Like the others I would change who I give them to and if grandchild should remark that you don't make her things anymore then it is your turn to say "but you didn't like the things I made for yöu." I have experienced this with my grandchildren-so I make things for everyone else who appreciates the work and time put into making an item. GN


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## chatkat (May 15, 2011)

Apparently a lot of us knitters and crocheters are able to empathize with you. My family (other than my husband) do not acknowledge or appreciate my handmade items made with yarn and love. Consequently, I have been knitting things for gifts just to give friends and also for their grandchildren. I have also knitted things for children at church - hats, shrugs, etc. as well as making things for their AG dolls. It warms my heart seeing these items worn. Some of the children who have outgrown their items are now telling me they would like some more!!! So sweet! So, I knit them some more!! There are people who appreciate your hard work, so knit for them!


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## nancyk (Aug 2, 2011)

I think children should thank those who gave them gifts as should adults, but this is an awkward situation.
If people don't like what is given or have become too old for whatever it is, should they keep saying they like it if they don't? That just means they get more of the same.
Maybe not using something is the most subtle way of getting the message across in an effort not to hurt our feelings.


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## Poffas (Jan 30, 2013)

It is sad when all your hard work isn't acknowledged I think your plan to knit for someone who has nothing would be wonderful you could look in charity shops for dolls in good condition :thumbup:


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## kniturassoff (Jul 20, 2011)

Debsy, I can see why you're feelings are hurt&#128542;. The most important thing is your relationship with your grandkids. I think it's great you go and watch their sports. I have teenagers who adore my mom. She has made an effort to have a relationship with them. The in- laws not so much. I never played with dolls as a kid. My mom painstakingly knitted them outfits and I never appreciated it until I knit as an adult. My friends dressed up my dolls when they came over. They enjoyed the outfits. Kids today communicate by cell phones and social media. They send thank you by text or a Facebook message. Also birthday wishes. I suggest you be-friend your grand kids on Facebook and start texting them if you're not already. I'm a case manager and one of my 90 year old clients texts a " goodnight, I love you" message to all 6 of her grand kids every night. They love it and she loves the responses she gets back. Hugs to you.


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## cowichangrama (Nov 12, 2013)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


I think that's a good idea. If you enjoy knitting doll clothes, don't stop and I'm sure that there are little girls who would love a doll with clothes. I had a daughter(grown up and a mum now) who never played with dolls, only stuffed animals so make sure you give them to a little girl who loves to play with dolls. I used to by the hour when I was a little girl.


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## limberlostgirl (Apr 10, 2011)

It might just be that she's already "outgrown" the Am. Girl doll phase....I think it lasted less than a year for MY grddtr. She HAD to have a doll; then HAD to have a second one; HAD to have clothes for them....and hasn't looked at any of it since! 
Your story also reminds of a quilting friend - she makes gorgeous quilts....her mom happened to mention that when small kids come over to jump on the bed, etc., she quickly covers up the precious bedspread with "one of your quilts !"
Save your efforts for more appreciative folks....there's plenty out there!


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## Munchn (Mar 3, 2013)

I totally agree with the post of going to Plan B. By not getting them for awhile she will notice and wonder why. I hope so at least.

I am sorry that you have your feelings hurt and I do understand as I am a grandmother too.


Phoebe's Mother said:


> Wonderful and loving "therapy"! I think your Plan B is a really nice one!


 :-( :-( :-(


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## onegrannygoose (May 13, 2011)

The first bear I made for my granddaughter was awful that is the only word that fits. I gave it to her anyway and found out just the other day 2 years later. My daughter told me that she was going through her toys and some to be discarded when she same to the bear and wanted to get rid of it. My granddaughter told her no that Grandma made that for me and it was going to stay. Love that child.


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## tidepools (Jul 26, 2011)

Shelters for abused families - very often they come with just what they are wearing. Years ago, when a much younger, more mobile me, was an active volunteer, I remember a little girl who, when she was asked if she felt safer, replied "yes, but my daddy has my dolly!"


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## Grandma Jo (Feb 18, 2011)

The thing is that kids are truthful and sometimes that can hurt our feelings a lot. I have a sixteen year old granddaughter, she is a very kind, sweet girl but doesn't want anything knitted so I respect her wishes.


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## Amysue (Apr 23, 2012)

Don't Blame the little girl, blame the parents, it seems today that good manners aren't taught in many homes.
even "Please and Thank you" (Whats an AG doll?)


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## scrappyfox (Apr 10, 2013)

The granddaughter is not to blame. It is the mother!!!! Apparently the mother has not been taught how to say thank you when a gift whether store bought or made is received. The mother needs to be re-educated on etiquette.


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## normancha (May 27, 2013)

Chocolatechips said:


> So sorry, but I understand those feelings. My only GD is 6 and loves the doll clothes I make (only 1 outfit/year now,) but still I cringe when I see them all "lumped" in a heap when we visit MA. But she plays with them (she has 3 dolls from her "rich" grandparents) with her friends. I also make some for my own doll (from Mary Maxim) as it's a great way to practice new techniques without too much tinking. I love the idea of making these outfits for charity, and will try that for Christmas. Sometimes dolls chow up at thrift stores. Keep knitting for your own enjoyment. That's what really counts.


I agree with You. :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## normancha (May 27, 2013)

Amysue said:


> Don't Blame the little girl, blame the parents, it seems today that good manners aren't taught in many homes.
> even "Please and Thank you" (Whats an AG doll?)


 agree with You. AG: American Girl (Doll)


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## LindaRodriguez (Jan 28, 2014)

So sad. You have the right idea of finding inexpensive dolls and making clothes for them to give to some less privileged children who will be thrilled to get them. Some of our children have so much that they scorn anything that isn't the hottest new item. Better to put that effort and skill toward making a child with less truly happy.


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## normancha (May 27, 2013)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


I feel for You. Believe me, there are many little girls that will need and appreciate your work.


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## MarjoryO (Aug 24, 2012)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


When you have the next batch done please post pictures so we can admire your creativity and hard work.  :thumbup:


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## joycevv (Oct 13, 2011)

Does your granddaughter not like dolls? That is the only reason I can imagine her acting that way. I would have been so thrilled if anyone ever gave me doll clothes when I was little and adored my dolls.
It is so sad not to see ones grandchildren often. Find some little girls who love dolls and knit for them!


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## Amysue (Apr 23, 2012)

Thank you Normancha, there are so many abbreviations written here that I don't know.


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## chatkat (May 15, 2011)

onegrannygoose said:


> The first bear I made for my granddaughter was awful that is the only word that fits. I gave it to her anyway and found out just the other day 2 years later. My daughter told me that she was going through her toys and some to be discarded when she same to the bear and wanted to get rid of it. My granddaughter told her no that Grandma made that for me and it was going to stay. Love that child.


Aww! So precious! That must have made your heart sing!


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## normancha (May 27, 2013)

Montana Gramma said:


> Can the GDs age be taken into consideration, did mom or dad help her with these gifts? I myself would talk to the parents, if she does not want them get them back and use for plan b.


 :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## krankymax (Mar 5, 2012)

It sounds like her mother never taught her manners.


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## pavasa (Feb 24, 2011)

This subject has been talked about before, but this time I am going to contribute my experience. 
I had made and sent some items for a grandson's newborn and did not receive an acknowledgement like others of you have experienced. Not knowing if I had used the correct address, I wrote asking if it had been received. Still, no answer. Since he also was one not to acknowledge the cash birthday gifts, I stopped sending even that. Sad, because I thought we were close while he was growing up. It's been over three years, and we have not had any contact. 
When it was mentioned they learn from their parents, I sure can agree.
Case in point: knowing my DiL was still having a hard time financially couple years after my son died, I sent her a $3000 check on her birthday. Was surprised and disappointed I didn't receive a thank you card, nor even email expressing her surprise & gratitude, upon receiving it. She did call days later to acknowledge receiving it, , But her first words were not thank you, as one would expect, just went on as we talked for quite awhile with updates, and those two words were never said. 
I could go on, about other times when such omissions happened throughout the years, but will spare you.


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## gma11331 (Oct 18, 2011)

Debsy: My friend is a foster parent and they have an organization that collects clothes and toys for foster kids. And each Christmas they have a party with gifts for the kids that otherwise might have a scant holiday. A lot of the placements are temporary and the kids are in sort of limbo...a cuddly toy or a doll to love can make a difference.

Incidentally, I was born at Memorial Hosp. in Cumberland altho I lived in WV 60 miles west. My cousins grew up in Cumberland and went to Allegheny HS I believe.


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## Myrafirst (Nov 24, 2011)

I had a good time making outfits for my granddaughters' AG dolls. Then I learned that what they want is to BUY the outfits and accessories they see in the catalogs. 
I was disappointed, too.
I feel sorry for the girls. They are overwhelmed by the seductive ads and so can't develop their own normal set of values.
If I had the time, I think I would buy my own AG doll and make clothes for her.


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## ADW55 (Mar 31, 2014)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


Wonderful idea, there are a lot of children that would really appreciate what you are doing and cherish the gifts.


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## lindajot (May 17, 2014)

Been there! Saw the prayer shawl I made for my Mother in law in the dogs bed . . . When hubby asked why don't I make my next pair of socksfor her, I said "I dont' think so!" Lol.
So sorry she didn't appreciate your gifts!
I love your plan B


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## Miss Annette (Jul 19, 2014)

I have been banging my head against that kind of brick wall for years and finally decided I don't need the hurt or frustration. I went with your plan B and found there are SO many people who want/need/appreciate my crochet items. I donate a lot to charities and if a friend or relative really likes something I've made THEN I'll offer to make one or put it on my to-do for gifts list. I give my items with no expectation of thanks or even acknowledgement, I make them because I want to and that is my reward.
Whatever happened to basic good manners though? Growing up I was taught to send a written or verbal thank you for a gift (even if I didn't really like it). You just do what makes you happy and you'll find many rewards!


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## normancha (May 27, 2013)

Amysue said:


> Thank you Normancha, there are so many abbreviations written here that I don't know.


You're welcome Amysue. You'll get used to them here.


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## jaml (Feb 4, 2011)

I don't understand some of these kids. Even their parents. The parents should be teaching them to appreciate anything that is given to them. I have had the same thing happen to me and I'll not make another thing for that person. Can't even bother to open the box until a later day. It really hurts, I know. Plan B is so much more rewarding.


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## nhauf001 (Jan 18, 2011)

I like plan B -- go for it Granny!


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## ChristmasTree (Nov 28, 2011)

bakrmom said:


> You don't say how old your GD is but"I haven't looked at them " is not necessarily a rejection. It's summertime. Kids are playing outside not playing indoors with dolls etc.


I agree, and parents keep the kids so busy they hardly have any downtime.


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## seemyart (May 31, 2013)

the truth is, we knit or crochet for OUR own pleasure! NOBODY enjoys receiving home made stuff! I never did, if it wasn't from the store, with a label, it wasn't "good enough". Kids especially feel this way. Yes, the parents should have made her say Thank you. It's the polite thing. But face it, MOST people do NOT want "hand made" stuff, no matter how beautiful. It's not nice, but it's generally true, especially in our affluent, Western society.


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## Janicesei (Jan 8, 2014)

My daughter never liked dolls when little and only if friends insisted did they come out. I sewed tons of clothes and pretty soon all clothes disappeared with the friends dolls. So, decided if daughter just not a doll kid it was ok. But some kids at church love a used doll with new outfit or two and it worked out good. Your plan B will be appreciated. Just because kids are related to you, doesn't make them fun to be around at times. Remember when your own were little and you were ready to give them away? 

Plan B is win-win! Hope it works for you. Ask the girls if they have a doll so you make clothes and not have to buy any. Or put the word out you are collecting dolls and moms will clean out the toy boxes and you will get more than you can imagine. The kids will love it too.


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## NJG (Dec 2, 2011)

Kids interests change like the wind. My GD will play with her doll every waking moment and then the next week she doesn't touch it. She wasn't being cruel or mean, just a child. Let it go and just love her. If she isn't playing with the doll and clothes at the present time, ask her what she is doing, what she enjoys and talk about that. It will probably be something different the next week. There are many many children out there that would love doll clothes for their dolls.


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## gma11331 (Oct 18, 2011)

I've come to realize that just because I love knitting, not everyone does and consequently don't understand what we put into it. Conversely, my son loves puttering with automobiles, but I don't want him to give me one of his rebuilt motors (an extreme example, I know..lol). That's why I only fill requests...and even sometimes those go by the wayside by the time I've finished and presented. C'est la vie! I think charity is the best way to go, where there is an actual NEED!


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## Shirley Copeland (May 30, 2013)

Mothers need to teach their children about thank you.
Mine saw to it that I wrote (printed) thank you notes and you are not alone; some I never hear from nor gifts acknowledged. It is their parents' neglecting to teach this very necessary thing. It helps children as and when they grow up, to know to appreciate what is given.
We have Sanctuary here where gifts are needed; Mercy Mall, Pregnancy Crisis Center; Children's Charity Ministry; and Hope House for the homeless. A friend and I knit and crochet for the mothers who get help from the Pregnancy Crisis Center. Also, the cancer support group who uses caps, knit and crocheted


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## Shirley Copeland (May 30, 2013)

you are right!


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## martina (Jun 24, 2012)

seemyart said:


> the truth is, we knit or crochet for OUR own pleasure! NOBODY enjoys receiving home made stuff! I never did, if it wasn't from the store, with a label, it wasn't "good enough". Kids especially feel this way. Yes, the parents should have made her say Thank you. It's the polite thing. But face it, MOST people do NOT want "hand made" stuff, no matter how beautiful. It's not nice, but it's generally true, especially in our affluent, Western society.


Well I love handmade stuff, and my sons and sister and friends appreciate blankets and scarves made for them.


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## kittykatzmom (Mar 1, 2011)

Debbie I'm sorry your grand-daughter doesn't appreciate your work, but you are putting it to good use. I'm sure there are many little girls that will be very happy on Christmas.


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## Momvam (Jul 31, 2013)

It's not only kids that can be cruel or ungrateful. I made a car seat afghan and a Baptism' blanket for my niece's baby shower. Couldn't attend so mailed them to get mother, & they arrived safely. That was 3 months ago, still haven't heard if they liked them! I'm tempted to call, but don't want to seem like I'm fishing for compliments. Guess I'll just keep knitting for Linus project or prayer shawls.


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## Jessica-Jean (Mar 14, 2011)

I do not place the onus on the parents. My grandmother raised me to send thank you notes to any and all relations who sent/gave me gifts of whatever kind. After her (too early to suit me) death, I just stopped doing that common courtesy. 
My mother raised three of my half-sisters, and they never did and still don't send thank yous, though they will say their thanks if I phone or hand over a gift in person. 
My step-mother raised my other two half-sisters, and they send itemized thank yous for every tiniest gift, but they don't write chatty letters.
I raised my son and daughter, and never made a fuss about sending thank yous. My son (now 41) does what and when he pleases. I don't think he sends thank yous. My daughter (age 39) _does_ send heartfelt thank yous. 
None of the lot phone or write to me with any regularity. If I don't phone ...

So, is it entirely the 'fault' of the parenting? I think the parents' influence is strong, but not overpowering. Individual attitudes also count. Those attitudes don't begin at a set age; they begin at birth and can only be somewhat influenced by parental input.

So, those of you whose gifts net no response, don't beat yourself up! It's not _your_ fault. Give what to whom when you wish and be pleased with yourself, even if you never hear a word of thanks or find your gift in the doghouse or garage sale. Let the act of making and giving *be* your reward.


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## Nancy S. (Jul 2, 2013)

I think buying nice used dolls & making clothes for them & giving them to children who would not get a Christmas gift otherwise is a fantastic idea. Bless you!!!


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## Memum (Jan 14, 2014)

Her parents should teach her some manners. It seams that parents today don't teach their children manners. Now I am surprised when someone says please, thank you or holds a door open for me instead of being surprised when they don't.


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## Fran42 (Mar 19, 2012)

I love your plan B! It will make two hearts very happy!


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## Fran42 (Mar 19, 2012)

"Let the act of making and giving be YOUR reward"! I like that Jessica-Jean. I'll remember that!


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## Momvam (Jul 31, 2013)

True, it isn't entirely the 'fault' of anyone. I'd be the first to admit I get lazy about thank you's sometimes. And I've taught my kids, but they don't do it either. But, conversely, in this email day, a simple note doesn't take much time. Considering that an email was sent confirming attendance (or not)with driving directions. And I do agree the giving is its own blessing, that is why I'm not calling. However, it still stings a bit not to receive any acknowledgment that it was received.


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## clairedene (Jun 15, 2014)

I sell my AG doll clothes at a local handicrafts shop here in Texas and they are greatly appreciated. So find a local shop to sell them. The actual AG clothes are very expensive and parents and grandparents like to buy the ones and others make (sewn, knitted and crocheted). You can find many patterns on Ravelry and other sites.


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## beachperson (Feb 21, 2012)

Debsy,
I know, I know, I know. But I also know the joy I feel when I knit items for charity. I make blankets for the Linus project/ I drop mittens and hats at the school. When I was a child I would have loved so much to have had those clothes you knitted. But I believe things must have changed. I don't know. I decided about a year ago I have had my feelings hurt for the last time. God bless.


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## Elin (Sep 17, 2011)

Me thinks she's a bit spoiled and could use some lessons in manners. My three grandsons are the same way.


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## julie windham (Feb 21, 2011)

nitnana said:


> Kids can be cruel, can't they? Parents should have told her just to say, "Thanx - I love them!" I once took apart and sewed a small teddy bear back together (his leg broke off) and, granted it was not a perfect job, but it took me a while & I did the best I could. My GD looked at it, said she didn't like it and left it at my house. He still sits on my bed, many, many years later!


Oh, Honey, throw that bear away. Every time you see it it will bring back painful feelings. Just throw it away.


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## Doriseve (Jul 7, 2014)

I would ask her to donate them to poor little girls. I made sweaters for step daughter and her husband. I found his sweater lying crumpled in his little sons closet. I asked the husband it the vest fitted and he didn't remember that he had it. I wanted to take it back and give it to someone else.


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## Sarah Chana (Apr 15, 2014)

I never liked dolls. 70 later I still don't like them. Never played with them BUT
ILove knitting and crocheting. I've made tons of things over the years and have 3 projects going now..my point is maybe they just don't like dolls? I confess that charities get a lot now and I only give to people who appreciate the hand work.
I knit and crochet all the time. My stach is growing out of the room but I'm undaunted.

Bottom line do what you enjoy someone will value it. :thumbup:


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## Sarah Chana (Apr 15, 2014)

I never liked dolls. 70 later I still don't like them. Never played with them BUT
ILove knitting and crocheting. I've made tons of things over the years and have 3 projects going now..my point is maybe they just don't like dolls? I confess that charities get a lot now and I only give to people who appreciate the hand work.
I knit and crochet all the time. My stach is growing out of the room but I'm undaunted.

Bottom line do what you enjoy someone will value it. :thumbup:


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## jbaumgart (Oct 7, 2011)

Knit for some other little girl who doesn't have a lot. You'll feel good about doing this charitable act, you'll make someone very happy and you can continue doing something that brings you so much enjoyment.

Your GD? When she asks why you don't make her anymore doll clothes, just let her know you are knitting them for another little girl who will appreciate them.


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## tricilicious (Aug 30, 2011)

It's a lovely idea to knit for the less fortunate but much more appreciative children. I know how hurtful it can be to waste time,love and energy on gifts that aren't even opened. Carry on with your good work for youngsters who will love what you do.


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## KateLyn11 (Jul 19, 2014)

Consider knitting for battered women's shelters and crises nurseries. Children in these shelters generally have to leave "home" suddenly with few if any possessions. I'm sure an inexpensive dolls with a couple of outfits would be cherished.


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## Amysue (Apr 23, 2012)

You must have been so upset and angry at the same time.I wonder what her reaction would have been if you had asked for the check back.


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## mossstitch (Nov 6, 2013)

So sorry yo read this but I understand the hurt you are feeling . It's the parents who are really at fault ,they need to teach the children how to react to a present they receive . 
Indeed give what you are making to someone who will appreciate it .
It's hard ,but I hope you can learn how to not take it personally .


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## Amysue (Apr 23, 2012)

Pavasa, I replied to your letter, its on number 14 page.


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## jojoacker62 (Jun 10, 2013)

The parents are at fault. They have not taught her manners. She should have sent a thank you note right after receiving them.


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## Vique (Oct 28, 2011)

I'm rowing the same boat, but I am about to bail out. There are people out there that would appreciate the things I make, so they will get them.


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## jonesalice860 (Apr 10, 2013)

My grand-daughter came down and I asked her if she wanted to take the dolls I had for her and put them on her shelf. I put the names on the bottom of my things, that I want to have them 'someday'. She knows that. 
The dolls were made by my aunt 57 years ago,when I got married. It is the bride and maid of honor and two brides maids. She said. "No, I'll wait "". I had to wait til she left to laugh.


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## Medieval Reenactor (Sep 3, 2013)

Perhaps knit her something more grown up and "fashionable"? Fingerless gloves seem to be the rage now with all ages. Find a pix of some famous teen idol, copy it and tell her, "I saw these and thought you might like some,"when you send or give the gift or some other ploy. Or, just ask her what her interests are now. Try to jump the generation gap and get to know her as a person. I know it's hard when they're far away, but as a child, *she* can't initiate the contacts - she's too young and inexperienced. Important thing is not material gifts but trying to forge a relationship.

Or just don't knit for her, at least not right now.


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## bonbf3 (Dec 20, 2011)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


I'm sorry that happened to you. Things like that make us feel just crummy, but you did a very loving thing for your granddaughter. When she's older, she may appreciate that your knitting for her was love. Knitting for other children is a very nice idea. You would get to enjoy your creativity, and children who don't have a lot would love to receive what you make.


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## bonbf3 (Dec 20, 2011)

shirleyoboe said:


> I'm so sorry....I know exactly how you feel!
> Is this your son or daughter's child?
> 
> Have the same situation with my son and daughter-in-law...they really don't appreciate anything we do for them--at least, they don't show it!
> ...


You are very wise. Life is complex for sure. I just hope that time will turn things around.


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## kathycam (Apr 24, 2012)

I love your idea of knitting for children who would really appreciate a gift--and there are soo many. Another idea might be sell your work to benefit a charity, such as St. Jude's Hospital. I think matching chemo caps for children and their dolls or bears etc. would also be appreciated at children's hospitals. I would let your granddaughter know what you are planning and ask her if she doesn't play with her doll and doll clothes anymore, if she would like to donate them. You never know, it might teach her something, if only that there are less privileged children in this world than she and her contemporaries.


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## Miss Annette (Jul 19, 2014)

Don't defend the parents or the kids please. I would have been too excited to wait to open any kind of present. And if the parents have their kids that busy it must mean they want their own time and have found ways to keep their kids out of their way. I didn't have "quality time" with my folks, I had actual time. My parents didn't have every new car or TV or couch that came along, that meant that Mom could be home with us and I really think that makes a difference. Praise for the single moms who don't have a choice!


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## Miss Annette (Jul 19, 2014)

I feel badly that you have gotten to the point you feel no one wants your handmade items. Shame on whoever got you thinking on that track.


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## Mary Cardiff (Mar 18, 2012)

Children have so many toys now,And don't seem to look after them,Years ago I bought 2 dolls and made clothes for them,They were for my nieces for Christmas,When we visited in the summer Carly said to her younger sister Zoe,not to let me see her doll, she had drawn all over it with flt tip pens,As A child my china doll was always dressed and looked after,I still have her,Can you imagen how long a china doll would last with a child now.


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## vannavanna (Oct 15, 2012)

Having always knitted for various gchildren my latest offerings for new GD met with " You don't put woollies on babies!". GD is now 5yrs old and I have kept on knitting still to be met with "thanks but no thanks" sort of thing. DL is Polish, a very polite young woman. Is her attitude a Polish or personal thing? Any other Polish young mums out there?


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## jeannietta (Mar 14, 2011)

Pleclerrc said:


> You are not alone. Although my granddaughters appreciated my knitting efforts when they were small, now that they are older they prefer going to the mall where they can shop and select their own clothes and accessories. ?Two of my friend's children, and grandchildren, don't acknowledge her gorgeous knitting or beading projects and toss them in the junk or give away. They continue to knit and bead but stash them until finding someone who does appreciate them. Rather then give to unknown sources, they wait to find someone who likes what they do and then surprise them with a wrapped gift. It may be someone they meet at a library, church or gathering, dental technician with children (nurse, mailman, grocery checkout gal, neighbor with grandchildren etc.) . Amazing how total strangers appreciate the love and time spent on hand-made presents. This way, they continue to do what they enjoy and also see the pleasure it brings others. Never know when they need a gift on short notice. You can also post them for sale on KP. Keep on knitting and enjoy your pleasure.


The other day I offered to teach my 9 year old granddaughter to knit or crochet. She told me she prefers to go to the mall to buy things. I was so different at that age. I lived for arts and crafts. I made my own dollhouses and paper dolls. I made apple seed necklaces (remember those?). I guess you either have the "gene" for handmade or not. I decided to just let it go. I will knit only for those who care.


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## jeannietta (Mar 14, 2011)

Vique said:


> I'm rowing the same boat, but I am about to bail out. There are people out there that would appreciate the things I make, so they will get them.


 :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## Karen's Creations (Mar 21, 2013)

I'm so sorry. I've had a similar experience with a granddaughter. Nowadays I make things for the two granddaughters that appreciate the effort and give 'purchased' items to the other granddaughter. Two different families so it doesn't cause a problem. I decided a long time ago that I wasn't giving hand knit or quilted items to anyone who doesn't appreciate them.


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## Medieval Reenactor (Sep 3, 2013)

kathycam said:


> I love your idea of knitting for children who would really appreciate a gift--and there are soo many. Another idea might be sell your work to benefit a charity, such as St. Jude's Hospital. I think matching chemo caps for children and their dolls or bears etc. would also be appreciated at children's hospitals. I would let your granddaughter know what you are planning and ask her if she doesn't play with her doll and doll clothes anymore, if she would like to donate them. You never know, it might teach her something, if only that there are less privileged children in this world than she and her contemporaries.


Absolutely fabulous ideas! Love the chemo caps for kids and dolls/bears. And asking the GD if she'd like to donate her doll(s) if can be done in a non-accusatory way.


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## Poffas (Jan 30, 2013)

It sounds to me like a thing personal to your DL


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## Gramma Bunny (Dec 21, 2013)

I do understand your feelings. Since she is young enough to play with dolls, where are her parents in all of this. In my house it would have been an invitation to a scolding and discussion about gift receiving and writing thank-you notes or making phone calls. My children have done the same with their kids. I won't mention the adult granddaughter that I have that didn't thank me for a hand made quilt I designed (cost $400.00). After almost a year I asked my son if she had ever received it. At this point in her life, her parents aren't responsible for her actions, but she was taught better.


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## Montana Gramma (Dec 19, 2012)

jeannietta said:


> The other day I offered to teach my 9 year old granddaughter to knit or crochet. She told me she prefers to go to the mall to buy things. I was so different at that age. I lived for arts and crafts. I made my own dollhouses and paper dolls. I made apple seed necklaces (remember those?). I guess you either have the "gene" for handmade or not. I decided to just let it go. I will knit only for those who care.


No electronics come to out house unless it is learning the alphabet etc., We do not take our Gkids to shop unless in Denver and it is a craft or fabric store. My friends have actually asked me how we get away with that and in dismay I tell them, I am the adult I control what happens. No child is going to dictate to me with emotion or a wallet! They have been playing in the sand box for 2 days now, walking the woods, doing the pirate thing in the rock gardens, catching balls etc. ages 3-11, I offer the activity they create the fun. None have said what can we do now Gramma, none say they are bored( spelled work at our house) they just play cause they have the opportunity. For those who do not know how to play, it is a perfect time to teach them when some Mom and Dads are not around to give into them. We are lucky our kids have taught them how to appreciate things, they have a lot, and to be kids. Likely take awhile for some of the great nephews and nieces to come around but next year we will have 2 here for a month and they rarely get to play outside or go to the park. They live on the computer. Will be a challenge I am sure!


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## Montana Gramma (Dec 19, 2012)

Montana Gramma said:


> No electronics come to out house unless it is learning the alphabet etc., We do not take our Gkids to shop unless in Denver and it is a craft or fabric store. My friends have actually asked me how we get away with that and in dismay I tell them, I am the adult I control what happens. No child is going to dictate to me with emotion or a wallet! They have been playing in the sand box for 2 days now, walking the woods, doing the pirate thing in the rock gardens, catching balls etc. ages 3-11, I offer the activity they create the fun. None have said what can we do now Gramma, none say they are bored( spelled work at our house) they just play cause they have the opportunity. For those who do not know how to play, it is a perfect time to teach them when some Mom and Dads are not around to give into them. We are lucky our kids have taught them how to appreciate things, they have a lot, and to be kids. Likely take awhile for some of the great nephews and nieces to come around but next year we will have 2 here for a month and they rarely get to play outside or go to the park. They live on the computer. Will be a challenge I am sure!


Well I meant "our" house to be sure lol. But they have learned to use that too at G Gramma's! But does remind me of how my older sisters use to go to the out house and read True Story! Private you know! Our Mum would have flipped a pancake if she knew, those were trashy you know, hahaha! If we only knew what real trash was back then. Things have changed and not for the better.


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## NJG (Dec 2, 2011)

Montana Gramma said:


> Well I meant "our" house to be sure lol. But they have learned to use that too at G Gramma's! But does remind me of how my older sisters use to go to the out house and read True Story! Private you know! Our Mum would have flipped a pancake if she knew, those were trashy you know, hahaha! If we only knew what real trash was back then. Things have changed and not for the better.


My mother use to read True Story when I was little. I tried once, but the word sex kept coming up and I didn't know what the word meant. Made the story real hard to understand, because I didn't know what these people were doing. haha


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## gma11331 (Oct 18, 2011)

NJG said:


> My mother use to read True Story when I was little. I tried once, but the word sex kept coming up and I didn't know what the word meant. Made the story real hard to understand, because I didn't know what these people were doing. haha


Oh my! I remember reading True Story at my friends house. My mother didn't censor my reading but she considered those magazines "trashy writing" so I was to stick to Lady's Home Journal, Sat. Evening Post, etc. Of course that made me even more anxious to get my hands on TS and its equivalent...


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## bonbf3 (Dec 20, 2011)

Gramma Bunny said:


> I do understand your feelings. Since she is young enough to play with dolls, where are her parents in all of this. In my house it would have been an invitation to a scolding and discussion about gift receiving and writing thank-you notes or making phone calls. My children have done the same with their kids. I won't mention the adult granddaughter that I have that didn't thank me for a hand made quilt I designed (cost $400.00). After almost a year I asked my son if she had ever received it. At this point in her life, her parents aren't responsible for her actions, but she was taught better.


That's very frustrating. Times have changed. My (grown) kids figure that if you said thank you in person, no note is necessary. I see the logic, BUT......

Two sets of GKs never write thank you notes, even if they don't receive in person. The other set does - credit to their mom - she has 5 kids and they start with just dictating the note, then when they can write they do their names. At about six, they do the whole note. Not easy - nice of them to go to the trouble. I keep all their thank you notes - they're dear to my heart.

It's a chore, but so is going out and buying a gift - or making one! And both are very nice for the recipient.


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## Gramma Bunny (Dec 21, 2013)

Thanks for reminding me of "True Story" and all of those magazines that I didn't dare buy. My mother would have killed me.


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## momidol (Mar 28, 2013)

So sorry that happened to you. I gave my great grand daughter an AG girl and a bag full of hand sewn clothes and some knitted. Her mother picked them up and I never got a thank you or an acknowledgement that she ever got them. In contrast her (mom's) sister posted several pictures of her daughter with her Bitty baby . So guess who is getting the knitted sweaters and doll clothes now. Almost 2 years later and it still hurts.


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## JoanH (Nov 29, 2011)

vannavanna said:


> Having always knitted for various gchildren my latest offerings for new GD met with " You don't put woollies on babies!". GD is now 5yrs old and I have kept on knitting still to be met with "thanks but no thanks" sort of thing. DL is Polish, a very polite young woman. Is her attitude a Polish or personal thing? Any other Polish young mums out there?


I am half-Polish.. so nope not a Polish thing my very "British/Danish /??? Gram made BEAUTIFUL "woollies" for us and the "greats" when they started coming. 
Still have the "same" sweater she made for me and then made one for my son when he was born. I take them out every now and again. My grands didn't use them cause they were stationed in Hawaii.. so no need there. Maybe my greats will get them?? 
My grand daughter loves her vests, sweaters and hats I make her and the boys even pick out their own patterns and colors. (they are in NY now, so little colder here) 
Once the youngest seen me knitting and asked if it was for him and then where is mine? when it wasn't.. So I am very lucky. 
But I have had the "pain" of having spent many hours making some thing and having it snubbed. I sewed my nieces first communion dress. She kept it on for church.. NO PICS... didn't make her another thing EVER...and she is my only niece on "my side".
I like your idea of making it for Christmas presents for children in need.


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## hgayle (Aug 22, 2011)

I buy Barbie dolls at thrift stores and clean them up and knit outfits for them and donate to the family violence center for the kids there.


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## gma11331 (Oct 18, 2011)

hgayle said:


> I buy Barbie dolls at thrift stores and clean them up and knit outfits for them and donate to the family violence center for the kids there.


Great idea. I still have my book of patterns for Barbie's that I used for my DD when she was little. I remember particularly a skating outfit trimmed in angora made of powder blue yarn.


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## Frannyward (Mar 22, 2012)

Oh Debsy. This is a coincidence because I logged on to KP this morning to have a vent about my knitting not being appreciated, when I found your message and you feel the same as me. I have 5 little grandchildren ranging from 18 months to 4 years and I have been doing a lot of knitting for them. 

Not one of those little children have worn the gorgeous little hats and sweaters that I made them. Being winter here in Australia I thought their mothers would have put these items on them to wear. But no. I chose really pretty patterns and more expensive yarn that I would normally buy. I have decided from now on I will knit for some little children and adults that are less fortunate. I am NOT going to remain feeling hurt, and will get on with knitting for people who will appreciate it.


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## JoanH (Nov 29, 2011)

hgayle said:


> I buy Barbie dolls at thrift stores and clean them up and knit outfits for them and donate to the family violence center for the kids there.


 I bet you they have baby dolls also to knit outfits for and give to those centers also... what a great idea hgayle!!


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## beckyors36 (Jan 23, 2013)

I knit for dolls and try to get the ones at Michael's and Joann's with there coupons and give them to the Sheriff's Dept for Christmas gifts for the Shriner. Very rewarding.


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## KarimaDee (Nov 10, 2013)

Oh Yes! Haven't we all experienced this heartbreak? Your solution is terrific! So proud of you that you did not let your disappointment deter your knitting life but instead you are channeling your work elsewhere.
Your little one may come around, may not. Keep on doing what you do!


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## bizzyknitter (May 10, 2011)

vannavanna said:


> Having always knitted for various gchildren my latest offerings for new GD met with " You don't put woollies on babies!". GD is now 5yrs old and I have kept on knitting still to be met with "thanks but no thanks" sort of thing. DL is Polish, a very polite young woman. Is her attitude a Polish or personal thing? Any other Polish young mums out there?


What does being Polish have to do with anything?


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## Montana Gramma (Dec 19, 2012)

hgayle said:


> I buy Barbie dolls at thrift stores and clean them up and knit outfits for them and donate to the family violence center for the kids there.


I get them at the $1 store, take their outfits off and put on knits and crochet! GD gets the poorly sewn clothes along with new handmade ones. Her little friends are pretty rough on things so that suits all.


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## CAS50 (Mar 26, 2012)

I'm so sorry she didn't even look at the clothes. It's so hard for me to believe.

I would be one of those kids that didn't have much and would have treasured a doll or knit dress forever! I remember being in the store and wishing some "rich" person would buy me a little stuffed animal or something, I wanted one so much! 

I think you have a big heart to still think of others and to have the idea to give your time and skills where they will be appreciated.


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## morgansam51 (Apr 4, 2012)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


Debbie, I'm so sorry you are discouraged. I know when I was a child my Mom and Grandmother made my, and my sister's, Shirley Temple dolls an entire wardrobe and we both really loved all the outfits! I wanted to let you know that I wound up purchasing an "American Girl" look alike from Target and I'm very happy with her. She's beautifully made and a lot less expensive than the "American Girl" dolls. I can't afford one of those dolls either. I'm sure there are a lot of little girls who will really appreciate your talent and effort.


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## Karen M1 (Aug 15, 2011)

when I was a little girl, my aunt(who live in NY and worked in a doll factory), would send me a large box with a few new dolls and tons of doll clothes. I would be so excited and would give some to the neighborhood girls....My mom would get upset with me.... a good memory for me..


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## busheytree (Apr 2, 2012)

Debbie, You know, I've been feeling the same thing lately. I've been knitting (everyday) for the last 5 years and everything I make is given away to family and friends. For clothing items I have never seen anyone of them actually wear/use them. I usually get a 'thank you' but that's all. I really like your idea of knitting for charity. Making something useful for someone who would appreciate the item sounds wonderful. I will start looking into the homeless shelters and hospitals in my area. Thanks for the great idea.


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## scottishlass (Jul 12, 2012)

All I can say is I understand Been there Done that and learned from the experience


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## eileenmary (Sep 8, 2011)

A similar happened to me I was asked if i would make some baby garments, A parcel was duly sent of to the recipient letting her know when it would be delivered,and guess what happened,she wasnt home when the postman tried to deliver the parcel, but a card was left letting her know where the parcel could be collected from,,, well ive found out the parcel wasnt collected and idiot that i am i didnt put a return address on the parcel, {didnt think it was needed as i had said a parcel was on the way}, Im not moaning,, well not to loudly,,,, but the yarn and postage cost over £40, tends to put me off doing anyone else a favour,,, thanks for letting me rant,


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## Alpaca Farmer (Jan 19, 2011)

I have 2 GC who graduated from high school a year ago, and I have yet to get a thank you from either of them for their cash gift. Yes, it hurts.


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## gma11331 (Oct 18, 2011)

Alpaca Farmer said:


> I have 2 GC who graduated from high school a year ago, and I have yet to get a thank you from either of them for their cash gift. Yes, it hurts.


My GD was handed two cards with gift cards in them after the ceremony. She thanked the donors but promptly lost both cards while changing in the gym for the "safe grad night" party immediately following!! I should have snatched them from her when I had the chance.


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## jeanniestrong (Jun 6, 2012)

I was saddened for you. It really hurts because there is so much love put into something you do for the grand kids. I would certainly go for making items to wear or play with for kids who get very little. It is a comforting feeling to make mittens, hats or socks and give them to your community for the needy. Perhaps you might have the opportunity to show your grandchild what you are doing and for what reason. That may be an example that will register if not now, in the future and that is a comforting thought too ,J.


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## dkovach22 (Jul 4, 2014)

It does hurt when a family member does not appreciate a hand knitted item. But 2 Christmas's ago a very close friend had asked for a shawl and she wanted it short, so I wanted to make it a surprise and didn't mention it, and ignore when she mentioned if I was working on it.
When I did give it to her along with a really nice pin, she acted very cold and didn't say thank you and I never saw her wear it again.
So now, I only knit for people who need it or will appreciate it, everybody else gets soap ! LOL


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## past (Apr 3, 2011)

I knit for charity and myself. I made several outfits for my grandson when he was born and never saw one picture of him in them even though my daughter and SIL ooohed and aaahed over them when given. 
I gave my cousin a sweater and hat for her little girl when she was born. She asked me for my address where I was staying at the time so she could send me a thank you card. I told her all I want is a picture of Ally wearing them once they fit. She sent me a photo.
I gave another sweater to the young man we worked for last summer when his wife had their 3rd child, a little girl. I received an email with a picture of her in her little sweater with a thank you and telling me it would help keep her warm on the cold winter nights.
Yet nothing from my own kids.


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## past (Apr 3, 2011)

I knit for charity and myself. I made several outfits for my grandson when he was born and never saw one picture of him in them even though my daughter and SIL ooohed and aaahed over them when given. 
I gave my cousin a sweater and hat for her little girl when she was born. She asked me for my address where I was staying at the time so she could send me a thank you card. I told her all I want is a picture of Ally wearing them once they fit. She sent me a photo.
I gave another sweater to the young man we worked for last summer when his wife had their 3rd child, a little girl. I received an email with a picture of her in her little sweater with a thank you and telling me it would help keep her warm on the cold winter nights.
Yet nothing from my own kids.


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## Ms. Stitch (May 3, 2012)

All of us love our yarn crafts and understand how much time and work go into our projects; most non-crafters do not. My pregnant neighbor won't realize I spent 48 hours on the seed stitch baby boucle blanket I will give her and probably would prefer to receive a Baby Gap gift card for the amount of money I spent on the yarn. I've also made countless AG doll sweaters, ponchos, berets, socks, mittens, etc. for my granddaughter with pretty much the same results as many of the posters here. Oh, well. A polite "thank you" would be nice, but these recipients did not ask for the knitted items (not everyone likes or wants knitted things), so I personally don't let myself be disappointed if they don't appreciate the effort that went into them. I knit because I love doing it, and I consider it a bonus if I see appreciation for my efforts. 

And on a related note, it's sad that saying "thank you" or even acknowledging a gift is pretty much history these days. I used to send gift cards for weddings, graduations, etc., but now I mail a check so I don't have to ask the recipient to be sure it has arrived...


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## PaKnitter (Mar 7, 2011)

Tell me about it...I made two outfits for our step grand daughter's preemie. Now the baby is 1 1/2 years old and I still haven't gotten a 'thank you' or one photo. 

My daughter even bought the thank you card, put the address and stamp on it. Our son-in-law said do nothing more for them because it is not appreciated. An outfit from Wal-Mart means more to them.


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## Joan Thelma (Nov 18, 2011)

cevers said:


> A lot of us have received similar reactions to our knitted offerings, and we sympathize with you and your feelings. Your plans to continue knitting doll clothes for children who want and need them is admirable and will be fulfilling for you. Carry on!


I was raised in a very loving home by two parents that both worked. We lived a very simple, but comfortable life and were taught to make good with what you had.

At Christmas time, my sister and I would always receive a knitted "new" outfit for one of our dolls. I still remember how anxious we both were on Christmas Eve wondering what this "new" outfit was going to look like. Both of us were thrilled on Christmas morning when he saw the "new" outfit that I learned many years later how my Mom would stay up at night after working the 3PM - 11PM shift in a knitting mill to finish them in time for Christmas morning.

IMO - kids today get too much "stuff" and don't appreciate the gifts they receive from the heart.


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## courtrymusic (May 10, 2014)

I had this happen to me also. Knit and crocheted clothes for my step great grand daughter(age 8) for Christmas, and when she opened them she asked me "why didn't you give me a real present?" and when she left she left them all behind.


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## DotS (Jun 25, 2011)

I feel your pain. Kids can be cruel. at least when I asked mine if they still played with the AG dolls, they told me 'no'. Glad I didn't waste any time knitting more outfits. Now I knit hats & scarves for them and usually ask what they would like & colors. Saves a lot of hurt feelings on my part and they get what they like. Last year it was slouchy hats & Harry Potter scarves.
DotS


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## sherrit (Jul 20, 2014)

So sad. Try not to take it too hard. It's really hard to know what kids will like. I have trouble with that all the time. I usually ask my grandsons (and my kids), now before I bother with knitting them something. Surprises aren't always appreciated. Anyway I, too, like your plan B. Here's an idea for plan C. Next time you visit your granddaughter, get the doll clothes and the doll out and play with them with her. Sometimes I can interest the grandsons in something if I do it with them. (They will do anything for attention).


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## sherrit (Jul 20, 2014)

Wow!!! I would stop giving him anything!


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## CYFFAN (Oct 24, 2012)

I found out that at least where I live the kids do not want anything unless its from the "real" manufacturer. In other words if its not made by American Girl they do not want it. I have made a whole lot of AG clothes and still have alot of them. I live where the AG dolls and accessories are made so I am not sure if this is just a local issue or if it is country wide. I am so very sorry..at least a thank you would have been in order.


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## dogpine (Jun 30, 2014)

I understand that everyone thinks that it's the parents' fault....but sometimes it's just the child's personality or circumstances. As our daughter was growing up we always wrote thank you notes together when she was young, and then she wrote them independently in later years...however when she became an adult it was another story. She lives in another state, 2 days drive for us. Her aunts gave her a lovely, expensive luncheon wedding shower and the large family traveled to her casual wedding with gifts. She wrote no thank you notes, emails , texts, phone calls, etc. I was mortified, offered to supply her with thank you cards and was rebuffed. A counselor advised me to let it go, which I did. I'm sure part of my mortification was because I know her inaction was in some eyes a reflection on me and "bad parenting." But I had to realize that she is an adult and responsible for herself. Now I personally get verbal thanks for things, and sometimes an email or text. Other family, understandably, sends her nothing, which is appropriate given her past behavior. Her husband is worse than her...I do not send birthday gifts or even a card to him now, but do give him a Christmas gift. The other parents no longer send things, after calling us to see if a gift had been received. (they live farther away than us and can't travel). Inconsideration is the way of their life...he didn't even give her a Christmas gift last year, which resulted in a lot of tears. This may be why she is becoming a little more grateful for our attempts...


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## ManyClouds (Sep 29, 2012)

I know how you feel. I knitted a beanie for my daughter, which she had asked for. That was last winter. She never wore it. I then knitted her a wedding cake as a gift when she got married. She was not impressed. She said it was too big for her house and left it at mine. I had hoped she would put it in her glass case, but she didn't have room and didn't want to move her old-style bears to make way for it    It had taken me ages to knit and I was secretly hurt, but on hindsight, I am happy for it to stay with me. My son's girlfriend said she wants one when they get married (all in pink!) :-D :-D :-D


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## Mary Cardiff (Mar 18, 2012)

AS a child I had a china dollswould have loved to have been given clothes for her ,My cousins father was in the navy would sale from Liverpool to Canada,He brought her a beautiful doll from Canada,My aunt made lots of cloths for the doll,Day were night ware,


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## Mary Cardiff (Mar 18, 2012)

I knit for Premature babys,The hospital are always pleased to get them,Or hats and cardigans for the charity shop,


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## skeever4298 (Jul 20, 2014)

I also have been in the same situation with relatives. Every time I made something for them, I wouldn't hear a word from them. That is when I started crocheting and knitting for charity. Pray about it. As God where you should give to and then do it. I am helping the Faith Mission which a home for homeless people to stay for the night out of the elements. I Also, am making afghans for the Children's Hospital. Finally I am making blankies for cats at a no-kill facility. Wish I could do more but there are not enough hours in the day.

Sherry


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## CBCAROL (Apr 12, 2011)

Debsy said:


> I made at least 8 complete outfits for my granddaughter's AG doll and put each in plastic bag. I gave them to her about 6 weeks ago ( she lives only hour away but they don't visit us but once or twice a year and we see them at grandson's ballgames when we go there) Anyhow, she told me last week at a ballgame that she hasn't even looked at them yet. I should be used to having feelings hurt but... I love knitting doll clothes so will now knit for little girls that may not have anything for Christmas and will enjoy a doll and clothes! I'll look for inexpensive dolls as we're retired and can't afford real ag dolls.
> Thanks for listening and understanding.
> Debbie


I agree with you...... I have decided on going the same way for 2 of my granddaughters.............. It's really funny, they cannot seem to find the spelling for ThankYou on their texting - but they sure find our phone number really fast when they want money........ They are sisters & are 26 & 22.....
I spent 3 weeks on each of their Lace Shawls & spent over $50.00 for the yarn for each of them..... And I made sure that I got the color that they each loved the best.... That was last Christmas..... & still - no thanks, how-to-do or anything.......... I KNOW that I raised their father better than that.... But they did live with their Mom and are both on their own now...... Younger one in 3rd rear of a private University........ Sorry for the boo-hoos.... It just gets me....


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## Kaitlyn25 (Dec 30, 2013)

My grandma sewed my teddy back together, patched him and everything else. I don't think an inch of original fabric shows, but every time she fixed my Fuddy I was so happy it was the best thing in the world. In fact she has given up on buying me anything since I was seven and that was fourteen years ago. She made me a beautiful lap quilt for this past Christmas and I couldn't have been happier. She took me yarn shopping the last time I saw her. She buys me raw materials to feed my knitting habit


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