# 3 years later & I'm still "miffed"....



## Knitcrazydeborah (Oct 25, 2011)

When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive. 
And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
(I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


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## no1girl (Sep 4, 2012)

I have been waiting thirty years for wedding Thank Yous from my OH's nephews and nieces.........wont every happen..........Stop being miffed and move on.


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## carolyn tolo (Feb 7, 2011)

The articles are lovely.

I wonder if the package got lost in the mail.

They might be wondering why you ignored the birth?


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## Jokim (Nov 22, 2011)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
> (I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
> Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


You have my sympathy. I attended a shower a 1-1/2 yrs ago, never received a thank you for my gift and neither did anyone else who gave a gift at this shower. Must be the new reality etiquette.


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## kiwiannie (Jul 30, 2011)

Yes it happened to me on more than one occasion,now I don't do it at all,just bad manners. :thumbup: :thumbup:


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## Doubledee (May 29, 2013)

I gave our niece $50 when she graduated from high school in May. Still no thank you. What do you expect from an 18 year old?? But You would think her parents would give her a little guidance.


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## no1girl (Sep 4, 2012)

carolyn tolo said:


> The articles are lovely.
> 
> I wonder if the package got lost in the mail.
> 
> They might be wondering why you ignored the birth?


she said the parcel DID arrive,


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## bwtyer (Oct 31, 2012)

You are not alone- Not sure why that simple little "thank you" never comes, not even in an email or a phone call, much less a letter. I still write thank you notes- to me, if someone takes the time to think of you, then take the time to thank them. It takes what? maybe 2 minutes of their time?


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## Pocahontas (Apr 15, 2011)

Yes, same here. I knitted a pretty little white dress and a darling multicolor hat, sent to my only niece for her new baby. Mailed it to her in Missouri, never heard whether she got it or not - still don't know. It's been more than 2 years. Miffed? Uh, ye -ah.


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## LaLaWa (Jun 20, 2011)

Oh my gosh, what a lovely set. I would be upset if I had made just one of those items and not received an acknowledgement, can't imagine how it feels with all the time and effort you invested.


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## dora mac (Nov 15, 2011)

I've been in the same boat for knitted items, money or other gifts that were never acknowledged. Rude people I believe.


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## Knitcrazydeborah (Oct 25, 2011)

carolyn tolo said:


> The articles are lovely.
> 
> I wonder if the package got lost in the mail.
> 
> They might be wondering why you ignored the birth?


Nope, they got it. I even could tell from the delivery confirmation what time it arrived and who accepted it!


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## Sewalaskan (Sep 7, 2013)

Just as bad, I gave a wedding shower for my niece. Had prizes and favors, food and drinks costs quite a lot. The grooms side of the family did not bring ONE gift for her. They said they didn't know they were supposed to bring gifts!! Ever heard of a gift less shower??


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## Knitcrazydeborah (Oct 25, 2011)

Pocahontas said:


> Yes, same here. I knitted a pretty little white dress and a darling multicolor hat, sent to my only niece for her new baby. Mailed it to her in Missouri, never heard whether she got it or not - still don't know. It's been more than 2 years. Miffed? Uh, ye -ah.


You know, I can't figure out how some people who KNOW that you made that lovely dress could possibly not appreciate it. I just, honestly, don't get it!


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## Lolly12 (Oct 10, 2012)

Yes, I did a cross stitched quilt for a friend, at the baby shower she looked at it and said, oh, this is kinda cute, folded it up and put it aside, never got a thank you, my heart was broken, all the time and love put into the blanket for nothing. I don't think it was ever unfolded and used. I wouldn't be surprised if it was sold at one of her many yard sales. I never made anything for her again, matter of fact we don't keep in touch, I have tried to keep the friendship going, but she is too busy. So, that is that :-(


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## countryknitwit (Nov 13, 2011)

Same thing happened to me--my cousin's granddaughter was expecting twin boys. Knit 2 blankets, 2 sweaters, 2 bunny blankets, plus sent a gift card for Walmart. Its been over a year, and no thank you from either. I decided I'm done.
On the other hand, I got lovely thank you notes from friends and daughter's fiance fiance's sisters (both had babies in summer). I don't knit for praise, but an acknowledgement would be nice--most of what I knit goes to charity.
My daughter is excellent at sending thank you cards, usually has them in the mail the same day. My son on the other hand....he received checks from family and friends for high school graduation. I took them all and told him he couldn't spend the money until the thank you notes went out. He moaned, groaned (and probably called me a lot of names), but finally got them all out in a week. He has been much better ever since.


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## Knitcrazydeborah (Oct 25, 2011)

Doubledee said:


> I gave our niece $50 when she graduated from high school in May. Still no thank you. What do you expect from an 18 year old?? But You would think her parents would give her a little guidance.


Yup. We had the same thing going on. The mother used to tell me via phone call what the 3 kids wanted for Christmas and birthdays. This was at a time when I would have to work an extra shift or two at the hospital in order to buy the toys and clothes requested, but I was delighted to do it. Really. 
But after a couple of years without even a phone call to say the packages had arrived, I let "slip" in front of my MIL that since I never got a single thank you note, that I'd decided to not buy gifts anymore. I've been getting thank you notes ever since. Like clock work. I'm not sure whether the kids have learned good manners or they've realized that "no note = no gifts", but I'm hoping it's the former.


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## CBCAROL (Apr 12, 2011)

I agree Deborah & I totally understand......
Sorry to say - It has happened to me.....


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## Knitcrazydeborah (Oct 25, 2011)

countryknitwit said:


> Same thing happened to me--my cousin's granddaughter was expecting twin boys. Knit 2 blankets, 2 sweaters, 2 bunny blankets, plus sent a gift card for Walmart. Its been over a year, and no thank you from either. I decided I'm done.
> On the other hand, I got lovely thank you notes from friends and daughter's fiance fiance's sisters (both had babies in summer). I don't knit for praise, but an acknowledgement would be nice--most of what I knit goes to charity.
> My daughter is excellent at sending thank you cards, usually has them in the mail the same day. My son on the other hand....he received checks from family and friends for high school graduation. I took them all and told him he couldn't spend the money until the thank you notes went out. He moaned, groaned (and probably called me a lot of names), but finally got them all out in a week. He has been much better ever since.


You know, I'll bet your kids are grateful that you cared enough about them to make sure that they knew how to behave with good manners!


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## Knitcrazydeborah (Oct 25, 2011)

Jokim said:


> You have my sympathy. I attended a shower a 1-1/2 yrs ago, never received a thank you for my gift and neither did anyone else who gave a gift at this shower. Must be the new reality etiquette.


Oi...I hope it's not!


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## Jimmy'swife (Nov 9, 2013)

I've done hand made gifts for my neighbor for all three of her children as they arrived. We keep getting written/printed invitations the the next birth, baptism, birthday, etc. Not one thank you in the past 8 years. Guess I'm just old school to think it's somthing I should do when I receive a gift.


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## Aggie May (Aug 28, 2011)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
> (I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
> Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


I am going to jump in from the other side, sort of.
Remember, not everyone thinks the stuff we make is as cute as we think it is, not that bad manners should be excused but it is easier to get excited over a gift we absolutely love.
I have a similar story from many, many years ago, when my sister was 18 and lived in Australia.
Mum and dad went to visit and I sent my sister a very cool, as I thought, pair of pink crocheted pants.
I was so sure she would phone the minute she opened the parcel but to this day she has never mentioned them.
She is now 61 and since 1989 has lived just around the corner from me and we do lots of things together.
I am so glad I did not hold on to my disappointment because I would have missed out on all the fab things we have done together over the years.
The recipient of your gift has not given it a second thought so you are holding on to this all on your own.
Write out what you have written here, on a sheet of toilet paper and flush it and also get rid of the picture so you don't have to remember how sad it makes you feel.
Life is too short to worry about the rudeness of others.
Think about what has just happened in the Phillipines and your disappointment will seem small in comparison.
Best regards.
Colleen
PS, Omitted to say how lovely your knitting is.


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## Raybo (Mar 12, 2011)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked.!


I'd be willing to bet you never made anything more for them!! But staying miffed only hurts yourself, obviously they don't mind. :thumbdown:


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## Jimmy'swife (Nov 9, 2013)

I remember my sister in law looking at an aunt who had given her a birthday gift and saying "I don't like it" to her face. Guess being honest is one thing. Hopefully the feelings of others are not what keeps us from doing what we love. 

I agree with the toilet paper suggestion. Like the letter you write to make you feel better - with no intention of sending.


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## mmorris (Sep 5, 2013)

An acquaintance sent her niece a 'healthy check' for a wedding gift. She received a note thanking her and asking her for more $$.


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## mmorris (Sep 5, 2013)

Jimmy's Wife:Bet she didn't get a gift the next year!


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## Bonnie7591 (Nov 15, 2011)

I agree, i think it is rude not to get a thank you but I ahve had the same experience many times whether is is wedding , bridal shower or baby shower. I don't know if it is a generational thing or what but it seems to me just bad manners. I think my DIL is guilty ofthe same thing but i dare not say anything


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## arlenecc (Jul 27, 2012)

carolyn tolo said:


> The articles are lovely.
> 
> I wonder if the package got lost in the mail.
> 
> They might be wondering why you ignored the birth?


Nope, she said she sent it confirmation delivery so knows it arrived. Forget it and make sure nothing further gets sent. One doesn't expect thanks for charity knits as its anonymous, but 
family is a different scenario.


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## standsalonewolf (Dec 1, 2011)

same here love the wolf thing


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## Helgajr1 (Feb 14, 2012)

i have my grandchildren age 11 and twins age 7 everyday while then parents go to work ,,so i am responsible to teach them good manners ...this is the one thing i preach to them all the time ,,"say thank you "
i explain to them ,that even if they dont really like what they got ,,that someone spent the time to buy it or make it for them..so it is very important


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## cathysmith97 (Jul 3, 2013)

I don't blame you. I would be livid. They are extremely rude. I can't imagine received beautiful handcrafted items and not thanking the person. I probably could not have contained myself and would make a point to ask if she "liked the items I knit for your baby." I think you need to somehow get in touch with her for closure on your feelings. Then I would, forgive, and bid the "friend" good bye. The forgiving part will be healing for you (as well as the good bye part).


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## redquilter (Jun 24, 2011)

The items are lovely and I know the time you put into them. There's no accounting for people's manners, or lack thereof. I know it's upsetting, but don't let it bog you down. We have to learn to let go of life's irritations. When my younger daughter was expecting, I knitted (with much help from the LYS - I'm not a good knitter) a gorgeous one piece suit complete with little feet and a hood. I crocheted a white christening blanket and sweater set, a blue & white afghan and made a cradle quilt and a crib quilt. I got lots of thank you's, but not one of these items were ever used. So now I knit, crochet and sew for charity. I don't get thank you's but I'm not looking for any and I know the items will be used.


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## HappyKnitting (Feb 26, 2012)

Yes, too many time. I am socked how people can do that.


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## sandyj1942 (Apr 5, 2013)

I only wish people were not so ignorant and rude. I went through that with my daughter-in-law. Knit so many things for the first grandson and NEVER saw one of the items on that baby and I was so terribly hurt. I guess I forgive her ignorance but wish people would respect us for the lovely things we do for them and just say a sincere "thank you".

Thank you for sharing

sandyj1942


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## Pocahontas (Apr 15, 2011)

Deborah, I'm sorry I failed to comment on your beautiful work. 
The layette is so complete and just as cute as can be.


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## run4fittness (May 22, 2011)

Yes, I know how you feel! I cross stitched the "Last Supper" for my MIL over three years ago and I am still waiting for a thank you. Won't happen. Same with other things I have given her.


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## HARRINGTON (Nov 21, 2011)

Yes .. this has happened to me more than once. The lesson I learned was never again to' that person'. I just was brought up better than to ignore a gift . Parents need to give their ADULT kids a reminder.


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## vjh1530 (Oct 8, 2011)

I bought my DIL one of those necklaces with the baby charm that has the baby's birthstone and a little diamond. I had it shipped to her house, but it went to the wrong address. When I got delivery confirmation, but never heard from her I called, only to find it had never arrived. Sure enough, it had gone to the wrong house and the person had signed my DIL's name next to the box with the printed name. I thought sending it "signature required" would make it safe to send, but all the person has to do is answer "yes" when the delivery guy asks "are you Jane Doe", sign "Jane Doe" and she's got a nice free delivery. 

Last week my son asked me to stay home because Fed Ex was delivering an important package and it had to be signed for. He gave me his ID so I could sign for it. Guess what - I found it sitting on the bench on the porch when I went out to get the newspaper. So who signed for it? The delivery person, I guess.

My point is that unless you call, you don't actually know for sure someone got what you sent. True, the person could lie and say they didn't when they did get it, but if you threaten to call the shipping company to report it before you hang up the phone the person usually confesses, I find. 

I never wait more than a week after I have sent something to someone and haven't received a message that they got it. That way I find out right away that it was not delivered and can track it, or I have embarrassed the person into confessing they got it and didn't bother to call. Believe me, the next time (if there is one) they call me. Either way I don't waste my time wondering what happened.


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## Rafiki (May 29, 2012)

Love and kindness are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who receives them, and they bless you, the giver. ~ Barbara De Angelis
When you learn to accept instead of expect, youll have fewer disappointments. ~ Robert Fisher

These were posted today - just think of it this way - you were blessed as the giver - even though they did not send you a thank you - it is the new way - very very few people even think to send thank you's. ~ Sad but true......


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## edgemanak (May 17, 2011)

I guess I'm not mature enough to wait for a reply. If I don't hear anything within what I think is a reasonable length of time, I call them and ask if the gift arrived.

Then they pretty much have to thank me. 

But you have to do that very soon after sending or it would seem strange.

On the other hand, I did get nice notes from my doctor's wife for gift to their new baby and also my dentist as best I could read his.

I sort of think of it as a teaching moment to call them up and ask if they received it. Also at a shower when I felt my gift sort of slighted, I picked it up and looked lovingly at it and said how darling I thought it was myself. Of course, several joined in then.

Maybe I feel I can get away with this being somewhat older now but I do just call them right up and ask if they got it or not.

And if they said they didn't like it guess I'd just never send them anything else and thank them for their honesty.

There are too many charities and needy people to put up with these rude ones.


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## sunnybutterfly (May 15, 2011)

Just wondering if you have had any contact with them in the intervening years or was that the end of the relationship?


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## Beverleyjean (Oct 17, 2011)

Yes it does hurt when you don't get a thank you or even a phone call when you give from your heart. But just think how it made you feel when you made the gifts, at least you felt good about knitting and giving them.


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## RIO (Mar 4, 2011)

A parent can give all the guidance in the world, but, if the young adult do not want to THEY WILL NOT! Case in point, I have ALWAYS taught, as well as had them write and send a Thank You card to their relatives when they were younger, and I would have hoped it stuck with them, but did it??? NO WAY, and when I reprimanded my daughter in not sending out Thank You cards after her wedding I was FUMING!!! I told her, "YOU were taught better then this!" No matter what I said, it didn't matter....This younger generation has gone way down hill in the area's of etiquette, manner's, and just plain consideration!!



Doubledee said:


> I gave our niece $50 when she graduated from high school in May. Still no thank you. What do you expect from an 18 year old?? But You would think her parents would give her a little guidance.


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## Frannyward (Mar 22, 2012)

HARRINGTON said:


> Yes .. this has happened to me more than once. The lesson I learned was never again to' that person'. I just was brought up better than to ignore a gift . Parents need to give their ADULT kids a reminder.


Oh, I so much agree with you. :thumbup:


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## Daisybel (Nov 27, 2012)

You go through life being generous and they go through life being selfish - who gains most in the end? 

I have two cousins who never ever send a thank you note, and two (much younger) nephews who always do. Not all young people are grasping and inconsiderate.


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## user64822 (Jun 21, 2012)

My daughters and their children do thank me, but my sons and their children don't, except if I give them a gift in person. My eldest daughter has always sent thank you notes in the form of a photo and note, which the children have written. She trims and laminates them, and makes them into bookmarks.


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## Glennis (Mar 10, 2011)

The knitted items are lovely. Very disappointing for you not to receive a "Thank you" from them.


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## NanBasKnit (Oct 4, 2013)

Does she know that you hand made those lovely items? Your work is very nice! Perhaps her thank you note got lost in the mail? Don't waste your precious energy on being miffed, life is way to short. &#128156;&#128153;


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## inishowen (May 28, 2011)

Yes, a man my husband knew, mentioned that his wife had just had a baby girl. I already had a beautiful vintage style pink cardigan knitted. I wrapped it up and hubby gave it to the man. I never got a word of thanks from them. That's the last time I will be kind to people I don't know personally.


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## Windbeam (Jul 31, 2011)

Sad people can't take a minute to call or send a card. Manners are a thing of the past. Wonder what they would say if you sent nothing?


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## Alandgirl (May 23, 2011)

There is absolutely no excuse for not sending a thank you of some kind. Admittedly I am old school and always send (and have my high school age kids send)a handwritten note and not an email for any gift.

In this case I think a thank you phone call followed by photos of the items in use would have been appropriate. I understand why you are still angry, but I guess you will need to let it go for your own mental health.

The items are lovely and clearly made with great love and care.


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
> (I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
> Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


I completely relate to this. Years ago I bought the 3 partners at the company I worked, holiday gifts. I shopped for days looking for each gift. Well while they did thank me ....sort of....in a generic email to everyone thanking us for gifts, I discovered the truth 2 months later. It was like someone had punched my lights out. One of the partners and I were hunting for something in their filing cabinet - there at the bottom of the cabinet were all of the gifts, all still wrapped, including mine. I was so tempted to take them back as I really like Waterford crystal and don't own any of my own but I just pretended I never saw. I never gave them gifts after that and although I never told a soul at work, I would try and discourage anyone from gifting them anything. It still irks me when I think about it, so I get where you are coming from.


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## inishowen (May 28, 2011)

I have a similar story dwenars. I worked in a childrens nursery, and at Christmas, the parents would bring gifts of boxes of chocs, and tins of biscuits for the staff. Well none of the staff ever saw these things again. One day I was in the managers office and she had to open a cupboard to get something. There were all the biscuits and chocs, neatly stacked! She knew I'd seen, so handed me a tin of biscuits to take home. I was dumbfounded. Why did she keep them? I've no idea.


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## Coral McRae (Jul 23, 2013)

My step daughter was given R17k (divide by 16 for £, by 9 for US$, approx) this year from her grandparents. She is yet to thank them. Ungrateful child. It is the new fashion not to thank. A text message would suffice. When she was a child I'd phone the post office to see if she had received the presents I used to send. her father used to say 'Maybe she hasn't received it' I'd tell I'd phoned the post office.

I'm so sorry you have been hurt. I just don't give anyone ANYTHING anymore, I say 'if you will use it...' And asked recently if a friend's baby would wear a cardigan if I made it. I'm not going to put myself out if the presents are not used.


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## Jeya (Aug 14, 2012)

Three years is a long time. Just pick the phone and ask them if they received the parcel because it is not like them not to acknowledge. The late call is because you just saw the photo.

I usually get upset with similar things but now I don't. I have this plague near my TV set It reads:

"HOLDING A GRUDGE IS LETTING SOMEONE TO LIVE RENT-FREE IN YOUR HEAD". My thoughts are precious and I'm not going to let anyone not worthy to occupy rent free in my head.


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## Jeya (Aug 14, 2012)

Three years is a long time. Just pick the phone and ask them if they received the parcel because it is not like them not to acknowledge. The late call is because you just saw the photo.

I usually get upset with similar things but now I don't. I have this plague near my TV set It reads:

"HOLDING A GRUDGE IS LETTING SOMEONE TO LIVE RENT-FREE IN YOUR HEAD". My thoughts are precious and I'm not going to let anyone not worthy to occupy rent free in my head.


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## Jackyv (Aug 7, 2013)

I can't believe that so many people don't say thank you, especially in this day and age of electronics. How hard is it to at least send a text or an email if you don't want to call. My oldest child is 16 and I had to nag her to say thank you for the gifts that she received for her birthday. In the end I told her that if she didn't say thank you not to be surprised if she received no gift next time. I am just about at the cut of point for certain people that don't say thank you.


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## maryannn (Feb 17, 2011)

Yes it has happened to me. I sent one of my felted handbags to a lady in the NE. She never responded and that was years ago. I also know that she received it. Oh well.
Your knitting was beautiful.


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## nancy11442 (Jan 19, 2013)

I have heard it said: you can't fix stupid! This is true. Like all of you, I have had gifts accepted (even expected) and ignored. Even recently. It hurts but try to let it go. You did a beautiful thing. The anger is hurting you. They are ignorant


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## Karen L (Feb 3, 2012)

My step grandchild almost never send a thank you unless it is a graduation or confirmation gift. Bithdays never. My daughter doesn't feel she can make them do it so it will go on. Someday I might just say something to them so they learn better.


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## kammyv4 (Aug 6, 2012)

I would call and tell them gosh, you came across the picture of the lovely items that you made and wondered if they ever received them. It would be a pity if they got lost in the mail. I know you know that they were delivered but think of the guilt they may feel if you tell them the above, for not sending a thank you.


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## gracemd (Aug 6, 2011)

The last baby shower gift I gave to a family member, there was no thank you card sent and a high school graduation gift for our next door neighbor, also no thank you. It is irritating, guess I will be more selective in the future; but can't dwell on it. Just let it go.


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## Sjlegrandma (Jan 18, 2013)

It's interesting. I was asked to make 100 special envelopes for my friends daughters 21st birthday invitations. When I emailed my RSVP which was some two months later this lass sent one back saying " so pleased I now have your email as I was wanting to thank you for making the envelopes etc ". She actually had my address and phone numbers but not email till then!


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## nomadbubbe (Feb 25, 2012)

I have found a solution! When a thank-you doesn't arrive in a timely manner, I send off a note saying how much I hope the kind gift I spent so very much time making (or purchasing/written check) is being enjoyed. I may never get an answer or that courteous thank you but I hope that I make the receiver of the gift just a bit more aware of their lapse in etiquette. At the very least, I am able to politely get this "off my chest".


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## harter0310 (Nov 13, 2012)

Yes, I have given gifts that were not acknowledged in any way. A verbal Thank You would have been sufficient but not even that.


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## morningstar (Mar 24, 2012)

So many hurtful things happen because of lack of communication. They may not have received your gift. Someone else may have signed for the package. They may have sent a thank-you that you did not receive. A simple phone call from you to ask if they received it could possibly have saved you a lot of angst. If they reacted in an unappreciative way, you could have responded in a way that would have freed you from all these years of anger. Your work is so beautiful and it was such a generous gift I guess I just can't believe they received it and didn't respond. Best wishes to you.


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## Bonidale (Mar 26, 2011)

I spent nine months knitting a shetland lace shawl in very fine yarn for my sister-in-law's new baby only to see it jammed in a drawer with some receiving blankets and it was never used for the Christening. That was forty years ago. Miffed? Oh yeah.


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## kathleenTC (Mar 14, 2011)

I am still waiting for a thank you for dish clothes I knit for a co-worker when she remarried about 4 years ago. I have seen her since then, but nothing when I did see her. She's not a kid either, probably in her 40's.


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## rondia (Nov 17, 2012)

yes, I think we all had that one happening. But remember you blessed the baby by giving in love.


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## williesmom (Feb 16, 2012)

It's been three years. Call and ask them. Say you want to take it up with the post office if it hasn't arrived, so you need to know. (I realize you know it arrived, but that's the excuse for calling). I did that about a wedding gift I ordered over the internet, and the bride was very apologetic. A couple months later, I received a thank you note.


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## Munchn (Mar 3, 2013)

Yuppers have had similar situations.

You are right. Wolves would send a thank you note of some kind, knitcrazydeborah.


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## Debby Welsh (Jul 27, 2012)

yep, that can really hurt, sometimes you need to find out first if your time and love and effort are going to be appreciated, cause some one out there will love your "labor of love", God bless.


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## M2SMRTFORU (Oct 28, 2011)

Yes and now for those kind of people I only send money. I don't waste my time making to give to someone who doesn't appreciate what they have.

I still do make for others and some of them have put things away to give their children for their children.

It takes all kinds.


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## ptober (Mar 24, 2011)

I still deal with lack of response when I send packages to my grandkids- its not the thanks but I would like to know if what I sent was liked by them as a help deciding what to send the next time!


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## GoodyTwoShoes (Apr 4, 2013)

Unfortunately this happens a lot and has happened to me many times too so I no longer make things for people who I know won't appreciate it. The rare times they say "I'd love one of those" I just smile and say something like, "yeah, they're pretty fun/easy/etc to make" and leave it there. Life is too short to carry a resentment like that, especially when the ones you're mad at have no clue you're even angry. If you see them again tell them you know of somebody in desperate need and if you can have the items back...


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## jonibee (Nov 3, 2011)

This is not good to carry this anger around with you ...chalk it up to experience ..are you still friends with this person..because you should have vented even just to say how did the outfit that I made look on the baby..Let it go..atleast you have a picture of your hard work..and you did it for the little one not the ungrateful Mom...and what you made is beautiful. I think we all have something that sticks in the craw(throat) but it's how we deal with it that counts..Get rid of this excess baggage...


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## Sagarika (Jul 17, 2012)

With great difficulty, I knitted a dress for a child, and the mother said that she had hoped it was a ready made silk dress.SHE ACTUALLY SAID IT.My knitted dress (hand knitted with lot of love and care) had elicited a lot of genuine compliments, before it was sent to the child, everybody, EXCEPT THE RECIPIENT appreciated it. Can anything beat this?


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## knitwitty (Feb 6, 2013)

I was so angry at my best friend's daughter for no Thank You (I had made a piece of stained glass for her wedding and shipped it to Europe)that I bought her an "Emily Post" book of manners (over a year later) and stuck a note in the Thank you section telling her that I would never send her another gift because it took too much of my time and she didn't appreciate it and she could explain to her mother why she would not be getting a baby gift when she had a baby. Well, got back a note that she was busy so that opened the topic of my having had 3 children and still finding the time for Thank You notes. It is VERY HARD to move on especially if you have done something special. By the way, today she sends Thank You notes for the least little thing and is always surprised that she has brightened someone's day, people do hesitate to tell you how much they appreciated the note.!


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## cgcharles (Feb 23, 2011)

Sounds like my daughter-in-law. I don't think the word thank you is any where in her vocabulary. Just don't understand kids now days.


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## janmary (Jun 6, 2013)

I posted earlier in the year about my SIL selling my handmade gifts at her yard sale for $2 for the lot. It helped a lot that the KP crowd agreed how hurtful that was. You can feel good that everyone here agrees with you and then let it go. The recipient of your beautiful work is not worried so you need to not let her poor manners worry you and do as I have. I will never gift her anything beyond a very small gift card and that is only to save my brother the grief if I sent her nothing. Have a great day!


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## martina (Jun 24, 2012)

It isn't just younger people who forget their manners. With not much money to spare we bought presents for my only uncle's baby. They received them and never said Thankyou. That was over nearly 50 years ago. I remember because I had saved my little pocket money and it was the first time I met with such rudeness, but sadly not the last.


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## Knit crazy (Mar 13, 2013)

Children learn what they are taught. These "rude" adults did not have parents who required a Thank You note for every gift received or the gift to be returned. If you require that of every child from the time they start school and can write their name, they learn it is an important obligation for the recipient. Last May, my niece's husband got his MBA and she held a reception for him. My DH and I took a card and inserted a check. She sent me a text message thanking us with the comment, " ____ is just not good at writing TY notes, but I want you to know that we appreciate your gift." 

I don't respect him for his laziness. I doubt the MBA will get him very far in life because employers expect management employees to know etiquette and apply it. Nobody taught him better, and my niece will figure out some day that she married a loser.


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## Avalon37 (Aug 2, 2011)

You have to let it go! You are only hurting yourself by holding onto your anger. 
Just chalk it up to bad manners or ignorance and smile knowing that YOU did the right thing!


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## Marge St Pete (Jul 21, 2011)

It's a sign of the times. I would NEVER not send a thank you. Life is too short, ignore it and go on.


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## baskets69 (Mar 4, 2013)

Yes. The latest thing in MI is there are no thank yous sent out after baby or wedding showers. They have a token gift for each person and it say thank you. How tacky!


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## alifletcher (Jun 8, 2012)

I would get my New York up and a month after I sent it I would call or email to ask if they received it. If they forgot to thank you or are just clueless you are making them accountable for a response !!! As my mother always said "There is no excuse for bad manners" She would have let it go, I get my New York up !!


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## annie78 (Jul 17, 2011)

What a pretty gift! When I've given gifts and received no thank you (or even a "got your gift and hate it") I've gotten so those people are off my gift giving list. I think if they can't take the tiny amount of time to say thank you it is not worth all the hours of work and loving thoughts put into giving another gift. So sad that common politeness has gone by the wayside.


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## knitfan007 (Aug 12, 2011)

My mother in law said the only grandkids that ever sent her thank you notes were mine. They did it on their own as adults, because I made them do it from birth - nothing fancy but a note nonetheless.


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## knitfan007 (Aug 12, 2011)

My mother in law said the only grandkids that ever sent her thank you notes were mine. They did it on their own as adults, because I made them do it from birth - nothing fancy but a note nonetheless.


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## lwilds (Mar 29, 2011)

It has happened to me also with wedding and baby gifts. If I don't get a thank you of some sort, they don't get anything from me again. Plain and simple.


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## soneka (Feb 8, 2011)

I feel your pain. This seems to be so common these days, common courtesy is lacking big time.


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## Addyscloset1 (Jan 3, 2013)

Already 7 pages of comments on this - goes to show how insensitive many people are!!!! - It's happened to me also - I feel for all of you!


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## knitwitty (Feb 6, 2013)

Guess you touched a nerve as so many of us had to respond. I think we all have done something (we are giving people) for which our work has never been acknowledged, still hard to move on and now I mostly knit for charity. Your work is beautiful and really loved the tatting yesterday also.


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## Jeannie2009 (Mar 8, 2013)

I hear you and completely understand. I have had a similar experience many years ago.


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## Hudson (Mar 3, 2011)

I am sorry...I think it happens more often than not today. My mother stopped sending 3 of her grandchildren birthday and Christmas money because she never heard from them. I had to laugh in her memory as I got a wedding invitation from my husband's nephew; we have never received a phone call or mail from him ever before (he is 31)!!


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## Designer1234 (Aug 9, 2011)

Lolly12 said:


> Yes, I did a cross stitched quilt for a friend, at the baby shower she looked at it and said, oh, this is kinda cute, folded it up and put it aside, never got a thank you, my heart was broken, all the time and love put into the blanket for nothing. I don't think it was ever unfolded and used. I wouldn't be surprised if it was sold at one of her many yard sales. I never made anything for her again, matter of fact we don't keep in touch, I have tried to keep the friendship going, but she is too busy. So, that is that :-(


She is obviously the one with the problem!


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## beejay (May 27, 2011)

I was at a garage sale and saw a lovely quilted piece. It was a heart pattern.It measured about 3 ft. by 3 ft. On the back was embroidered the young couple's name and a date and a little message wishing them much happiness. It was signed by I guess the person who made this pretty piece. I bought it for $2 and it hangs it my guest bedroom. It makes me sad to think it ended up in a garage sale and according to the date was fairly new.


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## sbeth53 (Mar 29, 2011)

For this very reason I now limit my hand crafted gifts to a small group of folks who I know will appreciate the work that it took to make them. Not everyone understands the effort (and cost!) that goes into our creations. One of the perks of my selfish attitude is that I now have time to do more for me!


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## simplyelizabeth (Sep 15, 2012)

I don't understand when people don't say a simple "Thanks."...written, verbal, a picture...anything at all.


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## crafterwantabe (Feb 26, 2013)

Very nice gift. Been there too no thank you...several times. I don't understand people.


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## 59891 (Apr 18, 2012)

What is this new word "etiquette"????
I used to put packages of Thank You cards in my GK's stockings - wonder what they used them for?
My kids always wrote Thank You notes. Harummph!


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## debsu (Jul 26, 2011)

I truly understand. When this happens to me, I just figure the recipient has enough "stuff", so they don't get any more of my treasures! It will happen ONLY once for me, my time is too precious to waste on ingrates!


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## kippyfure (Apr 9, 2011)

yes--this happens--people do not always value the love and mastery that are involved in the creation of handcrafted gifts. I am at the pint where I say I am not going to give them anymore. I had a relative contact me and ask me to make something for her impending first born--and not only did I make it for her, but, when I could not find a pattern that I felt was good enough for the dragon photo prop she wanted, I designed it myself. All I asked her was to send me a photo. Never again--no photo for something that was a photo prop.


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## 13068 (Mar 23, 2011)

Yup, happened to me too - I've learned to forget; though forgive is still in the works!!!


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## mambo22 (May 11, 2011)

its just the newer generation. i taught my sons to say thank you and please and those words would come naturally....but todays little ones are handed ipods, iphones all kinds of hi-tec but none of them teach those two simple words. quite sad.
i have gotten the same non-response from dl and the younger generation for whom i have offered my long hours of loving work to. it is hurtful.


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## sbel3555 (Apr 11, 2011)

We are in the "entitlement Generation" They expect everything and give nothing. My D-in-Law did same to me. I spent 2 months making 2 beautiful layette sets (Lace) and told her she needed to put one of them on baby right away because it looked small. Baby is now 3 mo old and I've never seen either on the baby so far. I'm not miffed, I am PISSED.


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## albie (Jun 2, 2011)

i x-stitched a baby announcement for my x-DIL. i heard later that she said her grandmother made her a better one. when they had a tag sale,the item was on the table. i took it and told her that since i made it, i deserved it for free. she had a guilty,shocked look on her. my son and her were divorced 2 yrs later. thank heaven. never gave her anything after that. deliberately ignored her. she got the message! and also gave my son a good talking to..he can at least say thank you for items given to him and GS. new DIL is more appreciative.


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## Bunbun (Feb 13, 2013)

I sent beautiful SS candlesticks to my best friends son and new wife 15 yrs. ago and never got a thank you.
My "adopted" grandson turned Catholic and married a lovely young lady from Spain. I made beautiful rosaries for their ceremony and again no acknowledgement.
My own grandsons Never acknowledge a gift, my daughter does it for them (they are in their late 20's and this has been going on forever) but she never acknowledges what I give her. She wasn't raised that way but at 52 there's no hope for her ever changing I guess.


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## Jomoma83 (Mar 21, 2013)

I know young mothers are busy with work or school and a family. My niece usually sends me a text message saying thank you. My husband's cousin posted a picture with the jacket I knit on Facebook for me and everyone else to see. I think that's sufficient in today's busy world.


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## Sherriea (Mar 18, 2011)

Made a blanket for my daughter-in-law's sister's newborn - never got a thank you and they are huge into doing everything just right.....


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## JCF (Aug 3, 2012)

Now you KPers know why I do not knit for my family. Too much time and effort put in to not even get a "go to h---". So, yes, I've put this behind me and now knit for charity or myself, especially charity, which gives me much more satisfaction.


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## Livingwaters (Jun 14, 2011)

I have had 2 people I made baby blankets that used them every day not once thanked me


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## Katherine C (Oct 3, 2013)

I try not to have expectations for ANYTHING. Just sets me up for disappointment. It is welcome surprise when a good deed is quietly acknowledged.


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## Jaszy (Apr 30, 2011)

It is definately the new generation. They get too much and just don't have time to say "thank-you". Our kids were brought up to either call or write a note of thanks. Now they don't do that either.
I used to get really upset but have since opted to do this:
For Xmas and birthdays, I will give for three years and if for three years I have never got a thank-you, there is no gift ever again. I just decided that I am not spending my time shopping or making things if they do not have the time to say thanks. Strike 1, Strike 2, Strike 3 and you are OUT! And it makes no difference whether you send a gift or money which I tried on the 3 rd year. 
My husbands brother and his wife are so busy in their own little world that they never say thanks either. Some years they would give gifts and then several years would go by and no gift. Then a gift again with a note - Merry Xmas 2000, 2001, 2002 and 2003. We each got a book! And being a Doctor, he could certainly afford gifts. People are amazing! My shopping list has definately shortened and we donate to charities more instead. They acknowledge gifts.


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## Ronie (Jan 21, 2011)

Oh you need to just ask them if they ever got it!!! this is the perfect opportunity... tell them you were packing and came across this and realized you never heard back and had hoped it made it there... and sorry you didn't check back on it... but life gets in the way and after awhile it was forgotten about.. See what they say... maybe it did get there but you don't know if a neighbor picked it up for them or if they actually got the package.. 
Being miffed is only upsetting you... put the pressure on them to come up with a reason they didn't respond.. you might be surprised by their answer...

My Grand Daughter and Grand Son do not recognize the gifts I send them... they are getting gift cards this year! no more putting myself out and not even getting a phone call.. I knit for my Daughter and my Son and his sweety.. they love it all and are very grateful that I love them enough to spend hours of my time for them. Just 2 days ago my son was wearing a hat that I made him years ago.. he said.. "See this is the hat you made me".. it had been so long I would of never recognized it..LOL it is holding up very well..


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## zookeeper1 (Feb 26, 2013)

I really think that all this modern technology has allowed people to forget good manners. It really should have made it easier. 
A simple e-mail, or acknowledgment on facebook only takes seconds. However, the EXTRA EFFORT of sending a written thank you really tells that person how really special their attendance or gift was. It is so nice to receive thank you from people even if it just verbal. It raises one's spirits.


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## Beve (May 5, 2012)

The main problem is we don't know if they got the gift or not. On the bright side, my DD put a pic on facebook today wearing a hat and scarf I made for her last year.


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

Sagarika said:


> With great difficulty, I knitted a dress for a child, and the mother said that she had hoped it was a ready made silk dress.SHE ACTUALLY SAID IT.My knitted dress (hand knitted with lot of love and care) had elicited a lot of genuine compliments, before it was sent to the child, everybody, EXCEPT THE RECIPIENT appreciated it. Can anything beat this?


Yes. I offered to give my daughter in law a pashmina I had knitted for one of the parties she was going as she was struggling to find a wrap of some kind. She looked at me in horror and said 'god no, I could never wear anything homemade'. Well a few months back, I hauled out the pashmina I had knitted for myself and tossed it over my shoulders - it was chilly in the restaurant. Immediately she pounced on me - even got out of her seat , came over to me and stroked my shawl. 'Omg, where did you buy this gorgeous thing?" She yelped. Oh it's homemade, I replied, the one I had wanted to give you but you didn't want it. I eventually gave it to her as she didn't stop whining about what an arse she had been.


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## albie (Jun 2, 2011)

whatever excuse they can up with,there is NO excuse for bad manners. i gave up on the 4 oldest(16-25) GKs. they no longer get gifts of any kind for anything even $$ AND i let them know why. it doesn't seem to faze them. the four youngest(4-8)so far they are good to go. time will tell. am 69yrs and hope to last till they are in their teens and see what happens. MY oldest is pretty good,the middle one needs reminding,the youngest is the best. (ages46-44-37) it may seem petty but i deserve better. i still love everybody, but still deserve the common courtesy of THANK YOU.


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## helenlou (Apr 4, 2012)

Happened to me a couple of times, also. Those people will never receive a hand made item from me again!


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## Bernadettebunty (Nov 3, 2012)

I knit baby things for my daughter (who BTW lives just next door to me) when she was expecting son number three, not only did I not get a thank-you but I never saw him wearing any of the garments. When I queried she said she didn't like hand-knitted stuff.


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## GrandmaNona (Aug 2, 2013)

This has become the norm. I tried to get my GS and his wife to send thank you cards after the baby came. Even gave them the cards and a sample message to write. They laid the cards down and left them there. They are still sitting at my house and the baby is 10 months old now.


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## jujee (Aug 29, 2011)

It seems to be the times, I was raised to say thank you in person if possible followed by a written note saying thank you. I raised my children to do the same.
When my son got married in 2012 I made thank you cards for the couple that said inside "Thank you for the gift your thoughtfulness is much appreciated". All they had to do is sign and address the envelopes, I even gave them the stamps to mail them. No one ever received a thank you card, no one even got a thank you at the wedding from the couple. We gave them a photographer, wedding album, paid for all printing etc., they wanted to know what we were giving them as a gift. This was a 3rd wedding for both of them.
Our daughter in December of 2011 lost he husband after a short and sudden illness. He was in a hospital 60 miles from us but 15 miles from my hubby's work. My hubby stayed with her when not at work, I stayed home to care for our grandkids. Twice a week I would take them to the hospital to see their mom, we would have dinner together, talk , laugh , catch up. It's been almost 2 years now and everyday she says thank you, our grandkids also say thank you. I tried to tell them we did nothing special just what parents and grandparents would do.
My point both were raised by us in the same home, with the same morals. Our daughter appreciates what life has given her and is thankful, our son feels the world owes him. Life is short let go of the bad, embrace the good. Anger will not hurt them only you.


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## Knitcrazydeborah (Oct 25, 2011)

sunnybutterfly said:


> Just wondering if you have had any contact with them in the intervening years or was that the end of the relationship?


Oddly enough, no. But it wasn't me that finished the relationship. My DH was speaking on the phone to the husband of the recipient. I don't remember what it was about, but he decided that " they're not the sort of people we need as friends", which by then were living in the UK. DH is a pretty religious person, so I'm thinking it may have been a morality issue. Not sure.


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## dorisgene (Mar 30, 2011)

Know just how you feel. 

I have a niece I gave graduation gifts, handmade dresses and other items for baby gift, also wedding a gift. Asked my sister, her gram, if she had received the grad gift, but still nothing. On the baby gifts, I asked how her child liked dresses and was told she outgrew them before they could be worn, that was it. The wedding gift was not purchased from the store name that was included with the invitation, I was told they have up to a year to send thanks, but that has come and gone.

Another niece and nephew were given items and I asked their mum how they liked certain items. Guess she read them the etiquette code 'cause I've heard from them both and in fairly short order.

I must admit, I am guilty of this one time and it still bothers me. On the birth of my son I was given several gifts and sent cards of thanks. I was given a late present by a church lady that I really didn't know well. I didn't answer right away and life got in the way. I no longer have a way to reach her, but it haunts me. So, to all of those that have forgotten their manners, I say thank you. Thank you for taking the time and effort to show your love and care. Forgive us our short comings and let me state - you are much appreciated!


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## annweb (Feb 23, 2012)

Manners maketh man .....or woman! Last week I had a go at my grand daughter . The lady who looked after her as a baby had sent her a cheque for her birthday last April and rang me asking if I knew if she had received it .I had no idea so rang said gd and asked her .Of course she had and when I queried why she hadn't thanked the person she said 'I forgot ' i did my usual rant at her and asked what she would have thought if the childminder had forgotten her birthday .I might add that this girl was brought up with good manners as probably were those mentioned before but all of this training seems to go out of the window .We live in a selfish world I am afraid .


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## Limey287 (Nov 6, 2011)

I sure can sympathize with this - in the last 2 months I have given a wedding gift and baby shower gift and not so much as a verbal thank you. I did what was the right thing but they are now off my gift giving list - that is their loss and I have moved on - not forgotten, just moved on.


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## Friederike (Aug 26, 2011)

Oh yes, for once I can say I know exactly what that feeling is like. I crochet a large baby blanket for a friends grandbaby. Embroidered a large angel on it; curly hair and all.... Embroidered the baby's name and birthdate on it. Embroidered a verse around the 4 borders..... Well, you know the end of the story. To this day I don't know if that blanket ever arrived in Colorado where they lived at the time. In the mean time the "baby" celebrated her 15th birthday last week.
I really ought to ask the grandmother (my friend) about that blanket but yet, I can't help feeling silly asking after so many years.


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## BamaBelle (Apr 30, 2012)

I hate to play can you top this, but the same thing happened to me EXCEPT I was told later that since what I sent wasn't pink (the signature color) it was given away. I'll be #$%^& if they get another gift from me, no matter what the occasion.


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## mthrift (Jan 2, 2012)

People do what they do. Yes, it hurts, and that is why you are still angry..... you put a lot of love and care and time and effort into something very beautiful, and it was not appreciated (but maybe it was, & was not acknowledged). Let it go! People behave badly, sometimes. Forgive. We all slip up. Acknowledge your hurt, it is legitimate, your intentions were the best, and let it go. We all fail sometimes.


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## jannyjo (May 4, 2011)

It seams to be todays society. . My sister was upset and called me about a baby birth gift she sent to my youngest son. I was too cause their was not even a got it, thanks. 
Well I called him and he said his wife sent all thank yous out the next week after the birth, he said " have her check her email again". WHAT.


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## veets (Oct 7, 2011)

What a lovely gift! The rudeness of some people amazes me. On the other hand.. When my daughter's two best friends had their babies I knit many items for them, some in newborn size and sweaters going up to size 3. Not only did I get "thank you's" but as the baby grown in to each sweater they both take a moment and send a photo of the kid wearing it and thank me again. So that is the other side of the story.


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## veets (Oct 7, 2011)

What a lovely gift! The rudeness of some people amazes me. On the other hand.. When my daughter's two best friends had their babies I knit many items for them, some in newborn size and sweaters going up to size 3. Not only did I get "thank you's" but as the baby grown in to each sweater they both take a moment and send a photo of the kid wearing it and thank me again. So that is the other side of the story.


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## Donna M. (Oct 1, 2013)

All that work. The younger generation have no "Thank Yous" in their vocabulary. Most of them. When I send something, I actually ask the person if they got the item. Then I cross them off of my list of giving them anything home made. I always am afraid they did not get the item. Do you know if the person got them? I use to not only thank the person, usually my aunt, but I would either send a picture of them wearing the item. Or make sure they had it on, when we saw my aunt.


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## Hazel Blumberg - McKee (Sep 9, 2011)

So many people don't have a clue that they're supposed to say or write "thank you." I don't know if it's a certain age of people or if it's the times or what.

Just erase the whole incident from your mind. You're never gonna hear from these folks, so why let them occupy space in your brain?

Still, my sympathies.

Hazel


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## Bunbun (Feb 13, 2013)

I would be so thrilled to get anything handmade as a gift. I would be able, as a crafter myself, to appreciate the thought and love that went behind it.
I've never forgotten a RAK some 20+ years ago, a gal I worked with brought a cake to work for me on my birthday. I was so shocked and thrilled and have never forgotten it. It was the first cake for my birthday that I had received since I was 18 and left home (it was for my 50th) No one in all those years had ever even considered I might Like a cake. When I was married I of course baked my own cake but it's NOT the same. To this day when I see her I still comment how much that cake meant to me, She really didn't even know me that well at that time, just kind.


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## Maryhm (Oct 11, 2012)

Yes, it has happened to me. I made a statement, for all to hear, that I would stop sending gifts to those who failed to acknowledge them. Fast forward several years and I was invited to the wedding. This time I got a lovely acknowledgement from the young couple.


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## LilgirlCA (Jan 22, 2011)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> Nope, they got it. I even could tell from the delivery confirmation what time it arrived and who accepted it!


Just because the delivery confirmation says that it was delivered, that does not mean it was delivered correctly. Saturday I received (found) a package on my front porch. It had delivery confirmation tag on it. Unfortunately, it was for the same house number on the cross street. I took it over and left it on their front porch somewhat hidden behind a large vase as that is a busy street.


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## RuthieB (Jul 1, 2011)

I think the younger generation has lost a lot of etiquette & manners. I guess I'm old fashioned, but manners are a must!


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## Ann Heistad (Jan 18, 2012)

After reading this post You have every right to be "miffed". However, this generation are not being raised to say thank you, you're welcome or please, everything is on demand now. Niceness, kindness and consideration are considered a weakness. Perhaps they don't know how to say thank you. I experience this with my DIL and my grandchildren. My late husband would say, if after three tries it doesn't happen, move on........the relationship is not meant to be. Perhaps the thrill of being able to make these items could be enough for you rather than the thanks.


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## alsprink (Jun 26, 2013)

Yes, this has happened to me. I sent someone a beautiful and expensive book about foods to eat while you're going thru cancer treatment (she was going thru treatment at the time).
When I didn't get even so much as a text saying that she got the package, I thought, "she must think I'm lying about sending the book". Finally, I broke down and called her to say that I don't understand what is taking so long and that maybe it got lost in the mail. 
She said, "oh it came two weeks ago, thanks".
That "thanks" came 'a day late and a dollar short' as they say. That happened 2 years ago; and I haven't spoke to her since.


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## Earnie (Aug 8, 2012)

I guess we were raised differently. "Thank you" was part of my growing up and I taught my kids the same. But their kids are different. Like my GS who married 2 yrs ago. I guess because I could not make it to the out of state wedding, I don't get a thank you for the money gift sent.


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## sunshyne (Nov 29, 2011)

I a made a beautiful baby blanket for my great nephew he is going on 7 still no thank you....that's ok they will never get another knitted project from me...i'm still waiting for a wedding gift ty its going to be 8 years..some people just don't know the right thing to do...Susan


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## KiltieLass (May 1, 2011)

Yes -my stepson and his wife were also raised by wolves. I made a "Sorting Hat" as their daughter likes Harry Potter. Granted it was a few months ago, vs 3 years, but still no Thank You. Rude!


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## eahite (Aug 26, 2013)

This seems to be a huge problem in our society today and with all the modern electronics it shouldn't be.Even an Email is better than no recognition at all. When I started sending my college aged grandson a little money each month my stipulation was that he had to acknowledge the gift or he would not receive any the next month. Needless to say, the money stopped after only two months. This is a good kid, not raised by wolves but obviously something was seriously lacking in his upbringing. Good manners are a hallmark of a good society and I'm afraid our society is becoming substandard. Hope I'm wrong!


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## cbjlinda (May 25, 2011)

I agree with Carolyn you should have asked if they received it because it might have gotten lost in the mail. who knows she might even be mad at you for not thinking of her if it was. If you find that she did receive it and did not have the courtesy to thank you then just mark her off of your list for future gifts and let go of the anger. that anger doesn't effect her at all but it sure hurts you:.


Knitcrazydeborah said:


> When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
> (I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
> Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


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## leoanne (Feb 7, 2011)

My family went to nephew's wedding and gave money gifts that added up to quite a bit of money. It's been two years and still nothing. Oh well.


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## KnitNorth (Mar 7, 2013)

Yup, I had this happen recently. I met a couple a few times at my sister's home, and we ended up spending New Years' Eve (at my sister's home again) with them one year. 
I found out that they'd been hoping to have a baby for a few years, and may have left it too late (in their 40s).
Then I heard through my sister that the miracle happened and the baby boy was born last year. 
I was so excited & happy for them, I went to my cupboard of completed knitted items for babys and packaged up a blanket & hat, along with an ensemble of baby articles, got the address from my sister and excitedly shipped off my congratulations parcel.
N O T H I N G !
AND I know they rec'd it. They proudly told my sister they are so overwhelmed, they haven't thanked anyone. BUT, they still said nothing to her when she asked ... like it was nice of your sister ... zip, zilch, nada.


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## nevadalynn (Apr 27, 2011)

carolyn tolo said:


> The articles are lovely.
> 
> I wonder if the package got lost in the mail.
> 
> They might be wondering why you ignored the birth?


This is exactly what my first thought was


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## Briallu (Dec 4, 2012)

Earthier this year new neighbours moved into a house near me,while talking to them they mentioned that their daughter was expecting a baby so when it was born I knitted two pairs of booties for him and gave them to the grandparents.Later that night a hand written card was put through my letter box ,with it was a photo of the baby and thanking me for the gift from the baby's mother. When next I saw them the grandparents and mother thanked me again,they are not knitters but they said how they appreciated the handmade gift. Now that Christmas is coming I'm trying to think of something to knit for the little boy. Thought maybe a cap and mittens or a toy .Its nice to have thanks these days.


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## julietinboots (Feb 19, 2011)

When I give a gift it is nice to recieve a thank you but I don't expect it. I give the gift.


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## mthrift (Jan 2, 2012)

We ALL need to work on our Gratitude..... be aware of what we have that makes our lives better. Other's thinking about us & trying to please us, is a blessing, whether we like the gift or not. We have so much that we overlook daily, to be thankful for. We get so caught up in our lives, we forget the kindnesses that make all of the difference, until they are not there. I think it is a wake-up call for me to remember to be Grateful for anything offered to make my life better.


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## mthrift (Jan 2, 2012)

julietinboots said:


> When I give a gift it is nice to recieve a thank you but I don't expect it. I give the gift.


Yes. Never give more than you are willing to lose, and give with open hands, not expecting reward. You are right. Well said. Saves on hurt & stress. You may want it, appreciate it, but NOT expect it. Thanks.


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## shluke (Jan 26, 2012)

I don't think they realize when they neglect to send a thank-you that they are often taken off people's gift list forever. My dear Mom has stopped sending birthday cards and gifts to my son's family. She isn't angry, she just feels like it's sending someting into a "black hole" and she never knows if they recieved it, liked it, etc. I really can't blame her.


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## kimmyz (May 9, 2011)

Such beautiful things. It was very inconsiderate of them to say the least. Unbelievable, really. All of us who've been knitting, crocheting and giving for a lifetime have experienced this at one time or another. Cross them off your list for future gifts, and find people who truly appreciate all your efforts (or who at least have manners).


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## Mary Cardiff (Mar 18, 2012)

I use to sent things for my brother 2 girls,I would have loved a photo, of the girls wearing the things I sent,But my bother would ask my Mum to say they had recieved them and Thank you,A few years ago I made an Aaron sweater for his Granddaughter,a four year old,Sent it to his house,I think as soon as he got it he went out and bought Lola some really exspenive clothes,and set me photos of them by e mail,


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## blanchebianca (May 12, 2013)

The joy is in the giving; the pleasure in the creating. Your friends are the losers - they missed out on bouncing back this joy in the form of a thank you. 

This has happened to me a number of times and I treat it like a random act of kindness where sometimes you never know who is the recipient of your gesture. You know, like when you pay the toll for the person behind you or anonymously buy lunch for the next person on line. 

In addition to that, as I've gotten older, I've become more understanding of forgetfulness! They were new parents and were probably just overwhelmed.

I am sorry you were so hurt, though.


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## Murff (Nov 11, 2011)

I know younger people just don't send the "Thank You" notes, like I/we do. One would think they could have AT LEAST sent a note via email. When I look at all the time, talent, and love you put into these beautiful items, I'm quite appalled at the lack of a response. I would never knit them anything else again. Take care and try not to think about this.....easier said than done, I know.


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## Murff (Nov 11, 2011)

Doubledee said:


> I gave our niece $50 when she graduated from high school in May. Still no thank you. What do you expect from an 18 year old?? But You would think her parents would give her a little guidance.


We never receive a Thank You from our niece, when we give her a check for b'day, confirmation, and Christmas. We continue doing this because of her parents' icky divorce and the few times we see her. She does thank us in person, when we give her the $$, so maybe that's okay. Still kind of bugs me though. I always send a Thank You note.


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## Buttons (Feb 11, 2011)

I have never received a homemade gift. Everything was store bought. But then only my daughter knows how to made homemade things. (not knitting, crocheting or looming). My Aunt taught me when I was about 8 and then never picked up again until 8 to 10 yrs ago. Its a shame as I want to teach someone to knit and loom.


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## Lal (Aug 18, 2013)

I know how you must feel. Some folks never think about how a simple thank you is appreciated. Some don't even know the meaning of a thank you. But somewhere some little one is surely being warmed by your generosity. And some one is surely admiring your handiwork. You just don't know who.


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## Lal (Aug 18, 2013)

I know how you must feel. Some folks never think about how a simple thank you is appreciated. Some don't even know the meaning of a thank you. But somewhere some little one is surely being warmed by your generosity. And some one is surely admiring your handiwork. You just don't know who.


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## gram98 (Jul 8, 2013)

I know exactly what you mean. Never got any thank you's for shower, wedding or baby gift for niece. Needless to say i don't bother anymore. Those that do say TY more than make up for the ignorance of others.


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## Bj. (May 1, 2011)

That is so rude. It's been over a year and still have not gotten a wedding thank you!! Also several baby outfits I sent to a relative for their new baby, and money a month later for Christening. I'd even settle for a telephone call! Oh, well, no future gifts for any of them.


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## gaylemcleod (Oct 24, 2013)

If you don't give it up it will eat all your joy for other things.


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## Nanny Val (Oct 10, 2012)

Beautiful gifts.... I recently bought a gift for a friends baby (I did not knit a gift as I knew it would not be appreciated) I bought him a grow bag new name for a sleeping bag. My dd thought it was beautiful .... but guess what I never heard a thing from the mother. I know my daughters sent thank you notes with a picture of the baby on it, to all who sent presents for their children.


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## Cheryl Jaeger (Oct 25, 2011)

Yes it has happened to me. I feel your pain.


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## Bunbun (Feb 13, 2013)

I have a male friend over in Vt. that always compliments a lady when he sees her in a dress and in such a way you don't get the idea he's "picking up" or "on the make", he just likes to see ladies looking nice.
He opens car doors, store doors, etc.
If he's out eating and a family with young children are in the restaurant and behaving well, he goes over and compliments first the children, then the parents. He then asks if he can give the kids a $1 for being so good. The parents beam and the kids are happy as a lark.
While doing kindness he's also "teaching" others that Thank you and Please are worth doing.


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

Honestly I wonder if this trend is more a case of them not wanting handmade gifts than bad manners. My daughter and her friends are all vegetarian, eat organic, buy clothes at the thrift store and re-engineer them. They love hand knitted items and when winter looms, I get requests for scarves, hats etc. I knit them all (5 of them) fairisle totes for gifts one Christmas about 2 years ago. They all loved them except for the german exchange student who I had living with us. In fact we didn't even sign up to be host parents, I rescued this girl from another family who had decided that they couldn't deal with an extra mouth to feed. So that she could get her American experience, I jumped through all the hoops so she could live with us.

Well anyway, everytime I knit anything for my daughter and her friends, I also knitted the same for the exchange student. She hated it all, you could see the disgust on her face when I gave them to her and after she left, I found all the knitted items in the trash. I also realized exactly why the original host family pulled out of their obligation. Too bad I didn't learn my lesson as last year I hosted another kid - this time a boy - what a difference and what a pleasure...............anyway, I am rambling on here about something completely different LOL


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

Bunbun said:


> I have a male friend over in Vt. that always compliments a lady when he sees her in a dress and in such a way you don't get the idea he's "picking up" or "on the make", he just likes to see ladies looking nice.
> He opens car doors, store doors, etc.
> If he's out eating and a family with young children are in the restaurant and behaving well, he goes over and compliments first the children, then the parents. He then asks if he can give the kids a $1 for being so good. The parents beam and the kids are happy as a lark.
> While doing kindness he's also "teaching" others that Thank you and Please are worth doing.


Oh my Word, I would be so insulted if someone did that to me in a restaurant. Compliments are one thing but giving money...well for me that is just tacky.


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## Cheryl Jaeger (Oct 25, 2011)

Bunbun said:


> I have a male friend over in Vt. that always compliments a lady when he sees her in a dress and in such a way you don't get the idea he's "picking up" or "on the make", he just likes to see ladies looking nice.
> He opens car doors, store doors, etc.
> If he's out eating and a family with young children are in the restaurant and behaving well, he goes over and compliments first the children, then the parents. He then asks if he can give the kids a $1 for being so good. The parents beam and the kids are happy as a lark.
> While doing kindness he's also "teaching" others that Thank you and Please are worth doing.


What a Good person this Man is. He is teaching good things to children & parents. May God Bless him.


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## sdftrace (Jan 10, 2013)

How sad to read all the messages about family and friends and friends of friends not saying thank you. 

We've sent expensive wedding presents through wedding shops, baby gifts etc. and never received an acknowledgement.

However, one lovely young couple had printed a montage of a few of their wedding photos on a post card, wrote their message of thanks on the reverse (not a great deal of room I know but it certainly did the business) together with our address; stamped and posted with one month of the wedding. Would that others were so polite.

My Mother for years sent birthday and Christmas gifts to her great niece and nephew. At the time it was a lot of money for her - she did this from the time they were born until one Christmas she asked what to do as they had never once written a card of thanks. By then they were 18 and 20! 

All they had to do was pick up the phone .... My response was don't feel guilty just don't send anything. Then there was a call from their grandmother to say they hadn't received anything so she should perhaps cancel the cheque she'd sent!! I couldn't believe it.


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## kmansker (Dec 29, 2012)

Yep! It has happened to me a many of time and I make a mental note and they will not get anything else from me if they cannot take the time to acknowlege that they were given a present be it money or whatever but especially since you had to mail it that would really aggrevate me. I assume that this new generation does know what etiquette is. It really agrevates me also.


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## Bunbun (Feb 13, 2013)

the money is given to the children, NOT the parents and no one has ever told him they think it's tacky. I think its a good way to teach kids that there are rewards in life for doing things the right way.


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## vchavez (Nov 11, 2012)

What beautiful work. I do not expect a "Thank you" note when I attend a shower, because the honored person usually says "thank you to everyone for attending and the gifts". But when I send someone a gift by mail, I would like some kind of acknowledgement and a thank you, whether by telephone or note. But I am saddened that a few gifts that I have send out, I have not received a thank you note.


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## Paula Plant (Apr 5, 2011)

and it was so beautiful too.


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## Janet Odell (Jul 9, 2011)

I taught my children to write thank you's, but once grown, they forgot how important it was! I am disappointed, but it just does not seem to be important to them. Etiquette seems to be a thing of the past with many. Some do send thank you's though.


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## GrandmaJan (Sep 3, 2012)

Yes, it has happened to me and I got quite verbal about it at the next family gathering. "By the way, I spent a lot of time and money knitting something very special for your baby. I know you must have received it because my return address was clearly marked on it and it never came back. Did you not like it? Is that why I never heard from you?" 

Did it embarrass her? Yes. She fell all over herself explaining that she just doesn't send thank-you's and that people should know she appreciated the gifts. I let her go on and on, redfaced, and then I said. 

You're a mom now. It's time to grow up and act like an adult. And part of that means not being so self centered and rude.

Nobody dared say a word. I was angry and I didn't care who knew it. Needless to say I haven't been quite as generous to that individual since. In fact I never hear from her and that's quite okay with me.


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## Gweneth 1946 (May 20, 2012)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
> (I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
> Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


Does that mean that you have not spoken to her at all in three years.??????


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## 1crisp1 (Apr 1, 2012)

This is one of my pet peevs too. One close member of our family never ever rang or wrote a thankyou even though sometime later it would come up in conversation how much she really liked whatever. Now I find her grown children are just the same. I always said to my kids that if someone handed you a present you would say thankyou so if it comes in the mail it is most important to mail back a thankyou. I now always ring and say 'Just making sure you got your present in the post' after giving people a few days in which to contact me.


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## williesmom (Feb 16, 2012)

baskets69 said:


> Yes. The latest thing in MI is there are no thank yous sent out after baby or wedding showers. They have a token gift for each person and it say thank you. How tacky!


That's better than a blanket thank you on facebook. I've gotten those.

To be fair, it's not just the younger generation. It's some people of every generation.


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

Bunbun said:


> the money is given to the children, NOT the parents and no one has ever told him they think it's tacky. I think its a good way to teach kids that there are rewards in life for doing things the right way.


Different strokes for different folks. I grew up differently. We don't even gift one another money as a result. My kids were also always well behaved as they were disciplined - in this case all of them would show appreciation that someone noticed their behavior but they wouldn't take the money either. Rewards do not have to be financial.We are just different is all.


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## Mollie (Feb 23, 2011)

OK, I'm family-free, so it's not an issue. My DH, however, quit sending gifts to one of his grandsons because he never thanked him for anything! Most of the trick or treaters this year apparently didn't have the phrase "thank you" in their vocabularies either.


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## nomadbubbe (Feb 25, 2012)

I have 10 grandchildren. None of them have ever seemed to enjoy my choices for gifts. Early on, as soon as the kids got a social security number, I opened a joint account. Whenever a special occasion occurs, I put the money I would have spent on a gift into that account. Two of my grandkids have now benefited from those bank books when they graduated from high school. Not enough to pay the whole college tuition but a substantial amount after 18 years of saving. They were very surprised thinking I had forgotten their birthdays for all those years.


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## Bulldog (Mar 25, 2011)

I know exactly how you feel. I have crocheted many filet names with and without frames that I never received a thank you for. Now, I don't give them away so freely.

I also sent my husband's best friend a kitchen aide Mixer..had practically never been used. It was my Moms. My daughters didn't want it. I never received a thank you note.

Where has appreciation and common curtisy gone?


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## lynnlassiter (Jun 30, 2011)

all the time. the relatives think i'm odd for sending thank you cards!


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## Sammi (Nov 6, 2011)

Stories galore here, can't read them all, just know there are good people out there, and letting this happen once to you, or anyone else, is plenty, just don't let it happen again. Do not fuss about it, life is just to darn short, and the more you fret, the more they win in keeping you upset about the whole thing. Let it go, and move on.


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

And this is the reason my grandchildren get NOTHING from me.
And yet I fault their mother for not teaching them how to write, "Dear Grandma, Thank you".
I now send a card with just a few token dollars inside and write in the card, "If you cannot write a thank you note, I can no longer send you money". 
SAD SAD SAD.
I feel your pain.


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## MrsMurdog (Apr 16, 2013)

I am three ways about this. 1) yes, it is proper etiquette to send thank you notes. But, nobody teaches children manners these days... not parents, not school, not society. So, our "entitled" children feel its their due to receive. 2) Giving gifts is like lending money to family. You give it from the heart and never expect to get anything back. If you do get acknowledged treasure it. 3)I have been a working mother, working wife of disabled husband, work work work. It is often difficult (but never impossible) to maintain house, family, work and organize time for birthday cards and thank you notes. I prefer to make phone calls but even that often gets delayed to the point of Bad ME. I know sometimes the family gets peeved with me, but sometimes somethings gotta give.


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## aljellie (Mar 4, 2011)

When I sent gifts to my grandsons and got no thank yous I told my son to tell them they would get one more chance and if I got no thank you notes there would be no more gifts. I also told him it was his job as a parent to make sure the notes got written, that teaching manners was part of parenting. Next gifts got prompt thank yous. They even addressed the envelopes. Sometimes I think we have to keep raising our children as long as we're still on this earth.
Ellie


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## Joan L (Nov 5, 2012)

If you were to send this to me, I would send you a thank you note. Try it and you'll see! (the gifts are so beautiful!)


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## Alpaca Farmer (Jan 19, 2011)

Doubledee said:


> I gave our niece $50 when she graduated from high school in May. Still no thank you. What do you expect from an 18 year old?? But You would think her parents would give her a little guidance.


We had two grands who graduated last June, and I am still waiting for a thank you from them for the money gift. I raised my children to write thank you notes before they could use the gift. But they didn't pass on the same etiquette. My oldest daughter's two girls, 11 & 12, never fail to thank me. They call and email about their school activities, etc.


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## gjc1212 (Nov 7, 2013)

I'm afraid you're insulting the wolves in this situation! Even a wild animal recognizes kindness! Your work is incredibly beautiful and I simply cannot understand how anyone could receive such a thoughtful gift and not respond. You did a wonderful thing and that is where you have to find your peace. The ungrateful recipient is not stressed over this and you must try not to be either.


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

I can understand that you are very busy with a full load to carry.
But I still think it takes just a minute to write a thank you for something that took days even weeks to knit.
Yes I give from my heart , but BAD MANNERS are not appreciated by this Granny.
Children of school age should be able to write a simple thank you, Pre-schoolers certainly can draw a thank you picture.
Ignoring a gift is just not acceptable to me. JMHO


MrsMurdog said:


> I am three ways about this. 1) yes, it is proper etiquette to send thank you notes. But, nobody teaches children manners these days... not parents, not school, not society. So, our "entitled" children feel its their due to receive. 2) Giving gifts is like lending money to family. You give it from the heart and never expect to get anything back. If you do get acknowledged treasure it. 3)I have been a working mother, working wife of disabled husband, work work work. It is often difficult (but never impossible) to maintain house, family, work and organize time for birthday cards and thank you notes. I prefer to make phone calls but even that often gets delayed to the point of Bad ME. I know sometimes the family gets peeved with me, but sometimes somethings gotta give.


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## Shdy990 (Mar 10, 2011)

when I don't receive a thank you, I "x" them off my list of who to give things to


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## train (Nov 6, 2011)

don 't blame yourselves, and try not to be angry. You are the only one that's upset, they're not.


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## raindancer (Aug 19, 2012)

Unfortunately, I know this feeling all too well! I made afghans for my DH's 4 grandchildren, shawls and scarves for his children, and 4 years later, I have never been thanked. They were received because I inquired by email and was told "yes, we got them". Nothing more. The colors were all chosen by them, so that cannot be the reason. To put that much work into a handmade project and never hear a word about it is heartbreaking. 

Fortunately, I have a son, DIL, and her children who appreciate my efforts. The rest of the time, I knit for friends or charity. 

My DH and I have decided to leave everything to charity when we die, as son & DIL do not need it, and we refuse to leave it to the rest of the family as that would just be rewarding bad behavior.

I think it is sad that etiquette is not been taught these days.


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## Goldengate (Jan 30, 2013)

My exdil never acknowledged anything. Nowadays I always pay for tracking on packages. At least then I know if the item arrived or was lost.


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## JWayne (May 18, 2011)

I sent a niece a knit blanket for the baby and an a croched teddy bear for the older child and had to ask if it arrived because I never heard anything. She said Ohh I am so sorry they are really nice. Thanks. Never again. I guess you have to consider who you are sending these beautiful gifts to.


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## dinahflo (Nov 28, 2011)

Spent months making quilts for two nieces. Never a word mentioned about them.......


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## sarah66 (Sep 26, 2011)

I had something similar with a family member once. I asked if they would like something knitted for the children, and the request was quite specific, to which I obliged. I handed the items over which were then stuffed into a carrier bag to be taken home to put in the drawers. I happened to see one child wearing one item once, but never knew whether the other child wore hers or liked it or if it ever made it out of the drawers (at a young age they were left to choose their own wardrobe, not something I agree with, but that's another issue).
So after that I decided that I would make them items because I fancied making something for them, and accepted that it would be my own fault then if the item wasn't appreciated, because it wasn't asked for. To me that felt better than being asked for something specific and then it not being used. At least that way I was making something I enjoyed rather than to order. 
Wish I'd remembered that before my Remembrance poppy saga a few weeks ago- will I ever learn? Probably not!


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## sandytene (Mar 1, 2011)

My daughter did not receive wedding gifts from 3 of her closest friends. Who attends a formal, sit-down-dinner, open bar, etc and doesn't bring a gift? Some people!!!!


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## jaml (Feb 4, 2011)

I am having that trouble too. I know the things got there because I did call and ask if they got them. I have a friend that says if she doesn't get a thank you they don't get anything else. You wonder if they don't realize how much work and time goes into those things and you only make them because you love them. There was a woman that wrote Dear Abby and said that after 1 week the child had to write a certain number of sentences and each week the number went up. After 3 weeks the item was given to Good Will. I say that is a good idea. Your items are really lovely.


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## Montana Gramma (Dec 19, 2012)

Yup, and now unless they spend a lot of time, or have had, in our house and we have a close relationship, I give books. Beautiful work and we can only hope it got used and even passed on to some other lucky child.


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## gypsie (May 28, 2011)

Yes it has happened to me but it's only been a month on this one. there was another one, a blanket, two years ago, no thank you till I called and then my nephew said, "oh yes we got it, thank you". Nothing from his wife. Needless to say they have not received another item from me. It warms my heart when I receive a picture of the knitted item on the person it was intended for, especially a baby. I know how you feel! Your gifts are beautiful and it's not fair.


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## Montana Gramma (Dec 19, 2012)

raindancer said:


> Unfortunately, I know this feeling all too well! I made afghans for my DH's 4 grandchildren, shawls and scarves for his children, and 4 years later, I have never been thanked. They were received because I inquired by email and was told "yes, we got them". Nothing more. The colors were all chosen by them, so that cannot be the reason. To put that much work into a handmade project and never hear a word about it is heartbreaking.
> 
> Fortunately, I have a son, DIL, and her children who appreciate my efforts. The rest of the time, I knit for friends or charity.
> 
> ...


My Mum, having lived though the thirties with nothing still has a hard time buying herself something,she is very generous with her kids. We tell her all the time, buy tomatoes in Dec. even if they cost $2.50 apiece, treat yourself! So, I say to you, treat yourself everyday, enjoy the fruits of your labour and if there is anything left,do as you please, you will not be around to hear the ruckus!! Go forth, spend that inheritance!


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## CamillaDesertMouse (Mar 19, 2011)

Deborah you have EVERY right to be upset.

NOTHING excuses rudeness or poor manners .. period!

We knitters and crocheters put so much love in our work and to have it ignored without a simple thank you is inexcusable. 

I am sorry for your pain. I do understand.

Hug and God Bless your beautiful gift.

Camilla


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## JeanneW (Feb 9, 2013)

We have 8 children, 17 grandchildren and 3 g-grands. If I send them something I made or a gift, I text them or their parents. I tell them I have sent something and would like to know when they get it. Usually I do get at least a text or phone call, sometimes a note. Sad reality.


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## BluesChanteuse (Oct 14, 2013)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
> (I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
> Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


Well, I'd try not to take it personally, when someone is that thoughtless and ungrateful, it has nothing to do with YOU really. They're just jerks in that way.


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## Brynhatch (Aug 28, 2013)

You could contact and say something like , so sorry you did not obviously receive the gift I sent, I will in future wait until I see you before handing over the gift. That might get their interest up!


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## threekidsmom (Feb 8, 2012)

Wow! No one ever made me a wonderful gift like that for my babies! I would still be baking you gifts and sending you notes! ) (btw, my youngest is 33!)


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## martina (Jun 24, 2012)

Bunbun said:


> I made beautiful rosaries


How do you do this, please?


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## GC_Bonnie (Jul 10, 2013)

Yes, have had the very same thing happen and it makes me wonder if they were not taught manners as children or young adults. May be I'm getting to that "Cranky Old Woman" stage. LOL. A simple Thank you card isn't that costly.


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## kneonknitter (Feb 10, 2011)

Knitcrazydeborah said:


> When I found out that a friend of our family was expecting a boy, I set to work. I made every item in the photo below. Knit sweater & matching diaper cover, crochet blanket, crochet lamb pillow, and thread crochet booties.
> I was so happy with how it all turned out...sent it via delivery confirmation...it DID arrive.
> And three years later I've not gotten a thank you...heck not even a "By the way we got the package". And three years later I'm still ticked. No thank you?!! What... were they raised "by Wolves? ERrrr...excuse me wolves, bet YOU'D send a Thank You note!
> (I'm packing and came across the photo and was surprised at how angry I still am!)
> Has this happened to any of you? This one really hurt me!


I don't blame you, but, chalk it up to a learning experience. You are wasting your time & energy on people who are not worth your time & energy. Let go of your anger & move on. Do not ever knit for them again. I finally learned my lesson.


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## marlayna (Jan 5, 2013)

I believe our work is a treasure. We put a lot of thought and time into it.we build a relationship with our work. That's happened to me also on blankets. Most of the time I wish I'd kept it. I will miss my work sometimes also. Hang in there. :*)


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## determined_to-knit (May 16, 2011)

Your gift set is absolutely beautiful! You are very talented and generous! So sad that it was not acknowledged by the receiver! Some people are just rude...


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## Byrdgal (Jun 27, 2011)

I think it has happened to a lot of us!!
I just read an article in this mornings newspaper about that very thing! It was all about teaching kids to write thank you notes---don't give the child the gift (or to play with it) until the thank you note is written---even a little kid can draw a picture and let the parent write a quick sentence! Sounds good to me.
As for parents---I don't think some are ever taught those manners.


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## MAM136 (Feb 9, 2013)

Yes it is just pure laziness not to take the time to at least acknowledge someone's thoughtfulness especially if the gift is handmade. I have given shower gifts, wedding gifts, baby gifts, etc. and the younger generation today does not think it is necessary to send thank you notes. Its really disgraceful. The items you made were beautiful and should be treasured.


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## Montana Gramma (Dec 19, 2012)

lynnlassiter said:


> all the time. the relatives think i'm odd for sending thank you cards!


I always hear, " oh you always send a card " like it is unheard of anymore, maybe it is ! They seem so surprised but like it. Have they learned to do the same??


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## 2KNITCATS (Dec 19, 2011)

Your gift is breath taking precious. That baby received the energy or your good wishes even if the parents did not have the courtesy to acknowledge such a beautiful personal hand made gift.


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## GemsByGranny (Dec 7, 2012)

Pretty rude and thoughtless of them, KnitCrazyDeborah.


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## clearwater (Oct 11, 2013)

The lamb pillow is adorable!


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## Nicholas81 (Feb 17, 2011)

yes - it has happened to me and it did make me very angry at first - later I realized that there are many people who have not been taught to acknowledge receiving gifts -- either by phone or by writing a note. They have to live with themselves - you did a very nice thing -- smile and consider it a lesson learned. 

shelia
nc


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## Jimmy'swife (Nov 9, 2013)

I did a baby afghan for a the bosses son's first baby some years ago. (family business) Never received a thank you while others in the office did. One day the bosses wife asked if I would make an afghan for granddaughter. I think she was sadly embarrassed when I said I had already given them one - and it must not have made it home. Now the daughter had a baby shower this past Saturday. Once again I did an afghan, hat and booties. I received a thank you note the today's mail. Since I got a hug and thank you at the shower, I wouldn't have been upset if one didn't come in the mail.


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## sewingbuster (Oct 1, 2012)

I have given handmade articles to our step granddaughters and their girls. Have not received a thank you (but I have seen pictures of them wearing the items) and DO KNOW their mother taught them differently. My way of handling this is to tell them one gift - no thank you - no more gifting.


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## free2knit (Oct 27, 2011)

there is no excuse for plain out right rudness from people, the parents must be so proud. your work is very pretty and well done


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## kacey66 (Sep 9, 2013)

Gorgeous items! Your work is fantastic. Kids aren't taught anything about proper etiquette any more. Maybe moms are too busy working outside of the home.


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## Dakota Sun (May 25, 2011)

I understand your hurt. There is no excuse for any one to be so rude and not send a thank you note . What is wrong with society today. They have lost their manners and it is a shame. No thank you note and I would never make another thing for them. As the saying goes what comes around goes around and some day that person will get hurt feelings too. Best to move on and forget if possible. You did a beautiful job of knitting.


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## Dreamweaver (Feb 1, 2011)

Boy, this has sure hit home with many. What lovely things you made. (I especially like the sheep pillow). 

We attended a post wedding shower for a young couple we really don't know.... It was the grandson of my friend. This was last Sat. Our gift was not large or handmade. Today's mail had the most gracious Thank You from them. We were both very impressed. My GD's always send us A Thank You or we get a phone call from them. (Even when we just attend one of their games or school events.). I tell you this only to let you know that some parent's still teach good manners. It seems an awful lot of people missed that lesson!


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## Limeygal (Sep 27, 2012)

On a happier note I would like to report that I made a sweater, my first EVER quilt and a little hat for my 38 year old son's first baby's and his wife sent me a lovely, appreciative note. Some people are still teaching their kids something. She also phoned on receipt of the package. Made it all worthwhile.


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## Limeygal (Sep 27, 2012)

On a happier note I would like to report that I made a sweater, my first EVER quilt and a little hat for my 38 year old son's first baby's and his wife sent me a lovely, appreciative note. Some people are still teaching their kids something. She also phoned on receipt of the package. Made it all worthwhile.


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## Limeygal (Sep 27, 2012)

Sorry for the double post. My mistake.


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## diane_mw (Apr 2, 2012)

I had a similar situation . A friend of my sisters sent my son a hat when GD was born. My sister kept asking why he had not thanked the friend and got quite annoyed about it. It never arrived!!! I have recently sent a Halloween pumpkin to my GD that never arrived either. I am sending in a claim for lost post. Apparently Newcastle is a place that post often gets lost?


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## hempshall (Oct 21, 2013)

You are not alone - crocheted a jacket for a lady 20 years ago and she never paid me as promised. Have forgiven but forgotten???


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## GemsByGranny (Dec 7, 2012)

Jimmy'swife said:


> I did a baby afghan for a the bosses son's first baby some years ago. (family business) Never received a thank you while others in the office did. One day the bosses wife asked if I would make an afghan for granddaughter. I think she was sadly embarrassed when I said I had already given them one - and it must not have made it home. Now the daughter had a baby shower this past Saturday. Once again I did an afghan, hat and booties. I received a thank you note the today's mail. Since I got a hug and thank you at the shower, I wouldn't have been upset if one didn't come in the mail.


Well handled.


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## rondia (Nov 17, 2012)

gaylemcleod said:


> If you don't give it up it will eat all your joy for other things.


I agree. Most of us got a gift and did not say thank You and would like to be forgiven!!!


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## knitwitconnie (Jan 3, 2012)

That is sad, but there is a possibility that the package didn't arrive? I sent a thank you for a set of knives for our wedding many years ago, and the thank you never arrived. I know I sent it, because I had marked it off as mailed. She was ticked off at me and finally said something a year or two later. I was happy she asked me if her gift arrived one day. I showed her my notes and she was happy I had appreciated and was using her gift. It could happen the note got lost?
But I foo understand your frustration. This just reminded me of my mishap of actually responding with no credit! LOL


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## LilgirlCA (Jan 22, 2011)

alsprink said:


> Yes, this has happened to me. I sent someone a beautiful and expensive book about foods to eat while you're going thru cancer treatment (she was going thru treatment at the time).
> When I didn't get even so much as a text saying that she got the package, I thought, "she must think I'm lying about sending the book". Finally, I broke down and called her to say that I don't understand what is taking so long and that maybe it got lost in the mail.
> She said, "oh it came two weeks ago, thanks".
> That "thanks" came 'a day late and a dollar short' as they say. That happened 2 years ago; and I haven't spoke to her since.


I would give someone going through cancer treatment extra time and simply call to see if the book got there. They are sick and scared - normal curtsies do not come easy when sick and scared.


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

You are correct. It is eating me alive that to stand my ground and EXPECT thank you notes from the grandchildren, we have no contact at all. They KNOW because I have written out the rules for them. I write thank you notes to them whenever they sent something. I so want to SMACK their mother (dil) into another time zone for not insisting they use manners with me.
So here we are at holiday time and sadly their names are not on the shopping list. And my heart aches that I WILL NOT send a gift to them. And sadly I don't know if they even care. This isn't what I thought being a Granny was going to be like.
But there are several little ones who I have gotten to know the past few years that will have a glorious Holiday and new party dresses to wear because I get TY's all the time from their Mom's.
SO sad for us to not be appreciated for our time, talents and LOVE in gifting.


rondia said:


> I agree. Most of us got a gift and did not say thank You and would like to be forgiven!!!


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## inishowen (May 28, 2011)

LEE1313, nothing in the world would stop me having contact with my grandchildren. How can you break all contact because they didn't write thank you notes? On your death bed will you be happy because "you stood your ground"?


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## Sjlegrandma (Jan 18, 2013)

inishowen said:


> LEE1313, nothing in the world would stop me having contact with my grandchildren. How can you break all contact because they didn't write thank you notes? On your death bed will you be happy because "you stood your ground"?


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## Sjlegrandma (Jan 18, 2013)

inishowen said:


> LEE1313, nothing in the world would stop me having contact with my grandchildren. How can you break all contact because they didn't write thank you notes? On your death bed will you be happy because "you stood your ground"?


Sorry. Pressed send in mistake on last one.

Would have to agree with the above reply. My daughter has a great way to judge things. She askes the question of herself " is it life threatening " if not get over yourself and move on. My 4 grandchildren are such an important part of my life.


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## Judy M (Feb 17, 2011)

Several years ago I bought a quilt top, added batting, backing, tied it together and added a border for the daughter of a friend who lives with my sister.

I too am still waiting .........


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

And you are correct. But the mother has not allowed them to come to visit for 6 years. And sadly my son doesn't want to cause issues with her so he says nothing.
I no longer drive out there to visit. It doesn't end well with the mother and then the kids get upset. The last vaca I cut short and flew home early.
The only contact I had was sending them gifts. And then I never knew if they got them or liked them. Never a WORD from them.
So it has come down to "If you want a gift, I want a thank you note."
On my death bed- they won't even care. That would mean effort on their part to even show up. Won't happen. But thanks for your comment.


inishowen said:


> LEE1313, nothing in the world would stop me having contact with my grandchildren. How can you break all contact because they didn't write thank you notes? On your death bed will you be happy because "you stood your ground"?


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## Ms Sue P (Mar 19, 2011)

Sewalaskan said:


> Just as bad, I gave a wedding shower for my niece. Had prizes and favors, food and drinks costs quite a lot. The grooms side of the family did not bring ONE gift for her. They said they didn't know they were supposed to bring gifts!! Ever heard of a gift less shower??


My DH wants to know what rock did the groom's family crawl out from under. All showers include gifts.


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## qxerox (Feb 20, 2012)

I made a Grandma for her first baby girl a hooded Irish knit 
Cardigan--my go to sweater for years--never heard from either mom or 
Grandma by way of thanks--I was heartbroken and thought carefully
About making Grandma's such complicated sweaters!! I will never
Forget!!


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## rondia (Nov 17, 2012)

LEE1313 said:


> You are correct. It is eating me alive that to stand my ground and EXPECT thank you notes from the grandchildren, we have no contact at all. They KNOW because I have written out the rules for them. I write thank you notes to them whenever they sent something. I so want to SMACK their mother (dil) into another time zone for not insisting they use manners with me.
> So here we are at holiday time and sadly their names are not on the shopping list. And my heart aches that I WILL NOT send a gift to them. And sadly I don't know if they even care. This isn't what I thought being a Granny was going to be like.
> But there are several little ones who I have gotten to know the past few years that will have a glorious Holiday and new party dresses to wear because I get TY's all the time from their Mom's.
> SO sad for us to not be appreciated for our time, talents and LOVE in gifting.


It is so sad that you feel that way. If they only realise that you love them and want to bless them. And they are blessed to have a granny that loves them. Now I miss my granny!


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## rondia (Nov 17, 2012)

LEE1313 said:


> And you are correct. But the mother has not allowed them to come to visit for 6 years. And sadly my son doesn't want to cause issues with her so he says nothing.
> I no longer drive out there to visit. It doesn't end well with the mother and then the kids get upset. The last vaca I cut short and flew home early.
> The only contact I had was sending them gifts. And then I never knew if they got them or liked them. Never a WORD from them.
> So it has come down to "If you want a gift, I want a thank you note."
> ...


It is so sad to hear that. The mother does not realise that she is robbing her children of their granny. Just keep on giving so that your grand babies know that you are out there loving them. God will do the rest.


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## Carole Murphy (Sep 17, 2013)

Helgajr1 said:


> i have my grandchildren age 11 and twins age 7 everyday while then parents go to work ,,so i am responsible to teach them good manners ...this is the one thing i preach to them all the time ,,"say thank you "
> i explain to them ,that even if they dont really like what they got ,,that someone spent the time to buy it or make it for them..so it is very important


Wonderful of, you taking the time to teach them. thank you. I am surprised that so many on this forum hold such grudges. when did giving a gift become such a burden ? oh well, just my 2 cents worth.


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## Nanxy (Feb 25, 2011)

i have had the same experience and another very hurtful, I made a lovely shawl for a friend and when I gave it to her she did say thank you, then added, but I wish you had made something with sleeves! three weeks later I found the shawl torn apart and she asked me to fix it. I took the shawl, fixed it and told her I was not giving it back to her...and I have not, I'm enjoying it myself.That friend is not ever getting my work again, specially that when I made something I make it with love. We still friends


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## my2blkcats (Jun 9, 2011)

I think this has happened to everyone at one time or another. I really don't think people appreciate all the work involved in knitting and crocheting, be it a work of love because we enjoy doing it. Don't take it personally and if you should see her one day, just ask if she got any use out of the items and if they fit ok. At least you would know for sure if she really did get them.


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## Carole Murphy (Sep 17, 2013)

my2blkcats said:


> . Don't take it personally and if you should see her one day, just ask if she got any use out of the items and if they fit ok. At least you would know for sure if she really did get them.[/
> 
> Just love the above comment "don't take it personally". After reading so many negative comments on this forum about being miffed, hurt, unappreciated, I feel like I need to get this off my chest, if I offend anyone, than so be it.
> Get a life. get over it. I wonder why do you keep giving, then complaining? Use your talents for charity and don't expect credit.. Not everyone wants nor appreciates "our beautiful handmade" gifts. Life is to short to be so bitter.


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## Carole Murphy (Sep 17, 2013)

rondia said:


> I agree. Most of us got a gift and did not say thank You and would like to be forgiven!!!


oh how true. thank you for the reminder.


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## Marcia1767 (May 2, 2011)

Has happened many times with family. It always surprises me how ignorant people are. They only get me once though. It is very maddening though.


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## PaKnitter (Mar 7, 2011)

LEE1313 said:


> You are correct. It is eating me alive that to stand my ground and EXPECT thank you notes from the grandchildren, we have no contact at all. They KNOW because I have written out the rules for them. I write thank you notes to them whenever they sent something. I so want to SMACK their mother (dil) into another time zone for not insisting they use manners with me.
> So here we are at holiday time and sadly their names are not on the shopping list. And my heart aches that I WILL NOT send a gift to them. And sadly I don't know if they even care. This isn't what I thought being a Granny was going to be like.
> But there are several little ones who I have gotten to know the past few years that will have a glorious Holiday and new party dresses to wear because I get TY's all the time from their Mom's.
> SO sad for us to not be appreciated for our time, talents and LOVE in gifting.


I think all of us are still waiting for 'thank you's from a relative or friend that we are never going to see.

Our step grandchildren have excluded us from their lives saying they have enough blood relatives. They get nothing from us.
I would like to smack our son-in-law along the head and then our daughter because they blame the mother for everything.

There are 3 little boys who receive from us and they know how to say 'thank you'.


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

OH goodness. Me too. I fault the DIL for not insisting they write thank you notes. Then I want to "tan my son's backside" He was raised better than that. But he wants to keep the peace with dil. I want to wring her chicken neck. I bet her family get thank you since they all live right near each other. I live on the other side of the country and never see the kids. And sadly my grands are missing out on a lot. I had plans to take them to Disney a few years ago and the DiL wouldn't allow them to come for the visit. They had other plans with the neighborhood kids for a sleepover. DAH she is useless.
But I am glad I am not alone. I think we could fill the Queen Mary with those of us waiting for thank you's.


PaKnitter said:


> I think all of us are still waiting for 'thank you's from a relative or friend that we are never going to see.
> 
> Our step grandchildren have excluded us from their lives saying they have enough blood relatives. They get nothing from us.
> I would like to smack our son-in-law along the head and then our daughter because they blame the mother for everything.


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## Reyna (Oct 24, 2012)

I sent my granddaughter some money as a reward for a good school report. I waited for a thank you, after a couple of days I spoke to my daughter and said I had not received a thank you from Lisa yet. Two days later I had still heard nothing from her, so when my daughter called, I read her the riot act! I told her, among other things, that she was the one responsible for teaching Lisa manners, and should have followed my gift up in the first place. I finally received a thank you, and I have not had to remind them since!


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

WOW I did the same thing with my son over the granddaughters violin, His response " The kids have 2 parents and my input is not needed". 
Oh well them my gifts and money are not needed either.
Hurts me every holiday, but they choose this path, not me.


Reyna said:


> I sent my granddaughter some money as a reward for a good school report. I waited for a thank you, after a couple of days I spoke to my daughter and said I had not received a thank you from Lisa yet. Two days later I had still heard nothing from her, so when my daughter called, I read her the riot act! I told her, among other things, that she was the one responsible for teaching Lisa manners, and should have followed my gift up in the first place. I finally received a thank you, and I have not had to remind them since!


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## Carole Murphy (Sep 17, 2013)

kacey66 said:


> Gorgeous items! Your work is fantastic. Kids aren't taught anything about proper etiquette any more. Maybe moms are too busy working outside of the home.


Okay, one more thought, why is it always the mother's fault? Did you teach your son manners, and if so why doesn't he take charge. just wondering.


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## blanchebianca (May 12, 2013)

I think gifts are given for the love in the gift and the pleasure of the giving not the thank you. I don't give to be appreciated, I give because it pleases me to do something nice. As a matter of fact, I prefer to give anonymously whenever I can. If I can't, then I give because I want the recipient to know that he/she is loved, not so that I can be acknowledged. If giving is such a burden that "thanks" is required, then don't give, because there is pleasure neither in the giving nor the receiving of such a gift.


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## LEE1313 (Jan 25, 2011)

Oh I am sorry I disagree with you 100%.
I think "Thank you" is just GOOD MANNERS. I am speaking as a Grandmother of 3 who fail to acknowledge my gifts.
It has been on going a long time. The gifts are getting smaller and some occasions are skipped completely. I fault the parents, but they are all OLD enough to know manners.
I do not give to be appreciated. I give because I love them. And it is not a burden- BUT a Thank you is definitely in order. JMHO


blanchebianca said:


> I think gifts are given for the love in the gift and the pleasure of the giving not the thank you. I don't give to be appreciated, I give because it pleases me to do something nice. As a matter of fact, I prefer to give anonymously whenever I can. If I can't, then I give because I want the recipient to know that he/she is loved, not so that I can be acknowledged. If giving is such a burden that "thanks" is required, then don't give, because there is pleasure neither in the giving nor the receiving of such a gift.


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## susiq (Dec 10, 2011)

I am going to start sending a self addressed thank you note in all my packages with a stamp attached


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## Murff (Nov 11, 2011)

susiq said:


> I am going to start sending a self addressed thank you note in all my packages with a stamp attached


You are a clever fox. I've been to wedding and baby showers where I address an envelope to myself...............and yes, I do receive a Thank You note then.


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## rondia (Nov 17, 2012)

blanchebianca said:


> I think gifts are given for the love in the gift and the pleasure of the giving not the thank you. I don't give to be appreciated, I give because it pleases me to do something nice. As a matter of fact, I prefer to give anonymously whenever I can. If I can't, then I give because I want the recipient to know that he/she is loved, not so that I can be acknowledged. If giving is such a burden that "thanks" is required, then don't give, because there is pleasure neither in the giving nor the receiving of such a gift.


I agree.


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## blanchebianca (May 12, 2013)

Typically, I give gifts in person and I don't expect a written "thank you" for a gift. However, when a gift is sent, it is helpful to know that it arrived safely, so I agree, that including a self addressed, stamped envelope is a great idea.


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## DotS (Jun 25, 2011)

A few months ago, I gave my beautician a beautiful knitted blanket, a baby bib that I spent a few $$ more than I should have and some baby burp cloths that I made. Not so much as a Thank You when I gave her the gift and no Thank You note. This was back in the beginning of June. 
DotS


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## budasha (Aug 10, 2011)

I never got a wedding gift from my matron of honour and her husband. It took a while but I got over it.


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## Judy M (Feb 17, 2011)

budasha said:


> I never got a wedding gift from my matron of honour and her husband. It took a while but I got over it.


I would think her presence was a gift. Wedding gift no, shower gift, yes.


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## Judy M (Feb 17, 2011)

We had a quick ceremony at my sister's minister's house. My brother and sister stood up with us. But sister supplied a cake. I didn't expect gifts. Oh, well, but that was 53 years ago. LOL


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## budasha (Aug 10, 2011)

Judy M said:


> I would think her presence was a gift. Wedding gift no, shower gift, yes.


Neither and she was my SIL.


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## Kakuti (Sep 15, 2013)

Lovely!


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## BTRFLY (Mar 2, 2011)

I knit an Irish Knit sweater for my nieces boyfriends little boy. It turned out beautiful, and I too never received so much as a "thanks it fit". I know exactly how you feel. I'm not as nice as you. I called my sister to make sure my niece got it. Her response was "yes she got it". I learned from that experience to go ahead and make a gift, but don't be hurt it you don't get an acknowledgement. Your work is beautiful and I hope they did appreciate it.


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## Revita (Jul 24, 2011)

Nice work, but not everyone has manners and I know you did not do this to receive a thank you. You have been given a gift and you are serving others...you can't ask for more than that. What a wonderful person you are to think of others in that way...we are placed on this earth to serve others, even those who are not always as gracious as we would like them to be. I am sure that they probably think that they have already thanked you. If you mentioned it to them...they would be saddened that they have not thanked you. Blessings to you...


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## Viddie (May 20, 2011)

Happened to me 2 times, guess not all folks care about other peoples feelings as we do . :thumbdown:


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## isaacsnan (Apr 10, 2012)

Last year a friend of my daughter was having a really bad time due to marriage break up and was really struggling to clother her new baby girl. I made at least £100's worth of baby clothes...The "friend" even brought the baby to my home wearing some of the items I had made, she didn't even say thank you or any mention at all of what I had done for her.....I never ever ask for money for anything I make, I just like giving things away to people to appreciate my time and effort...Needless to say I will not be making this so called "friend" anything more...Good manners cost nothing...I like you am still angry when I think of what I did for her....xxx.


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