# Is it just me...!?!?!



## danyxx2421 (Jan 24, 2011)

I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.

I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.

Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


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## Isis (Mar 24, 2011)

I've knit people gifts this year - but only because I was trying to save money and I always wear hand knitted sweaters or cardigans especially in the fall or winter, and you don't have to feel guilty


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## danyxx2421 (Jan 24, 2011)

Isis, I just started a short cardigan for myself. My skills have not gotten to that level yet, I have to say I"m a bit jealous...lol! I understand about the gifts and saving money that makes perfect sense I just didn't want to put pressure on myself especially when people seem like they don't appreciate the time it takes us to complete some things!


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## lifeline (Apr 12, 2011)

I think you are very sensible. 

I have made gifts for people this year, BUT I did start making them in the summer so I didn't feel any stress or pressure. And I have made other things in between. Last Christmas was my first year as a knitter and I decided to make a scarf for DH. I had left it too late really and got very stressed with it, especially when I got flue the week before Christmas. I tried knitting, but was so ill that after 3 stitches I thought what on earth am I doing and had to put it down. No more pressure again.


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## lifeline (Apr 12, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> Isis, I just started a short cardigan for myself. My skills have not gotten to that level yet, I have to say I"m a bit jealous...lol! I understand about the gifts and saving money that makes perfect sense I just didn't want to put pressure on myself especially when people seem like they don't appreciate the time it takes us to complete some things!


The point about people appreciating what you made them is very valid. I have only made for those I know will appreciate it.


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## Sorlenna (Feb 17, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do...so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline!


 :thumbup: You said it best yourself! Notice I took all the "mean" out of the quote? :XD:


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## danyxx2421 (Jan 24, 2011)

Thanks friends I appreciate your thoughts, I was starting to feel guilty...!


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## Deb-Babbles (Mar 4, 2011)

I do mostly charity knitting. Yes, I make things for my children and grandchildren all the time. Bad for me though is I can not wait to give it to them. People who ask that I make something I have to tell them, I will when I can but I can teach you if you need it faster. 
I do try to make sure I have knitting done for the just in case type of gift. One never knows when a new items might be needed.


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## AnnKnits (Oct 19, 2011)

No, your not a grinch. Its great to knit for others and I enjoy it to, but I rather to knit on my timeframe and give it as a surprise rather than the "expected" gift.


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## ireneofnc (Aug 15, 2011)

dannyxx,

No, you are not mean or rotten to think that way. I have/am experiencing the same thing. I love to knit and give away things that I've made. But, I tell you, it's a totally different feeling when you have people ask for things; indeed it does bring about stress and feelings of pressure.

I have reached the point that when asked to make something, I tell them up front "I don't know when I can get it finished, if you don't mind waiting, because I'm working on a million other projects.

Sometimes I even offer to teach people to knit. Some are lazy, and just want you to do it all. Others simply are not interested but want to reap the benefits of your hard work.

I understand what you mean, because nobody wants to be stressed out!


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## kmcnaught (Sep 13, 2011)

Charge them for yarn and labor. These requests should die down


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## kmcnaught (Sep 13, 2011)

Amen!


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## kareo (Apr 24, 2011)

We love knitting for the relaxation and pleasure it brings us, correct? You are not mean - you are right on track with most of us. All the pleasure would be gone if we had to knit on a timetable...we do enough of that at work...this is fun.
Keep on knitting and showing us your pictures!


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## danyxx2421 (Jan 24, 2011)

This site is the best ever, thanks everyone!


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## Colorado knits (Jul 6, 2011)

This year I made our grandson a Wallaby sweater; for others I made one pair of socks, a pair of leg warmers with matching hat, and 3 other hats.

I briefly though about getting a couple other things made and decided that I do not need the stress. 

Throughout the year I made just a few things for charity plus hats for a couple women I know who were going through chemo, one of which I worked on while on vacation.

Sometimes we women are our own worst enemies. We have enough stress and problems in life (seems to come in waves, doesn't it?) and we do not need to exacerbate it with unrealistic projects and timelines.


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## heathert (Jul 27, 2011)

Yes, I'm sure you're a dreadful person. Most people who give their hard-work away are. Not really, just joking. Good on you for not putting pressure on yourself. There's enough pressures in life these days without putting them on yourself. Relax....... enjoy......... Merry Christmas.


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## cbjlinda (May 25, 2011)

You hit the nail on the head" I am exactly the same way. There is a reason for this. My girlfriend and I used to love and I mean loveeeeeee tole painting and some dear soul talked us into selling christmas items. well that was the end of it for both of us. we were so sick of it by the time we got through that neither one of us did it any more. I love quilting and used to sell them in my beauty shop. half of my shop was set up for quilts and when I wasen't working on hair I would run to my quilt frame and get in a few stitches. people would come in all the time and aske me to make quilts. I said no" when you see a quilt on the wall for sale then you can buy it but untill then " it is simply my hobby and I intend to keep it that way. Now I did sell a lot of quilts but it was at my pace and I never felt pressured which makes a big difference. Its just not worth all that stress too me.


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## jmai5421 (May 6, 2011)

I agree with you all. I mostly knit for grandchildren. I know that my daughter appreciates everything. She has seen me knit and knows how long it takes. As for everyone else including my sisters, when they ask I offer to teach. They do not appreciate the time and work. I only knit for them if it is a gift that I want to do. I made them the ruffle scarves for Christmas. I am knitting a friend some chemo caps but it was my idea. Since she doesn't know about it the deadline is mine. Other than that everything is for me and my immediate family and charity. I don't think anyone is selfish for not doing a request, just offer to teach or direct them to youtube for lessons.


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## Gerslay (Oct 4, 2011)

Knitting under pressure or knitting with pleasure?
Hmmmm, let me think...which one do I want to do?
Knitting with pleasure of course!

If you should decide that you want to knit Christmas gifts then I suggest you start in September...if the list is long then start in July and mix in Christmas knitting with whatever else you want to do. 

The key word is "want"...otherwise, you get pressure!

Enjoy!


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## farmgirl (Jul 19, 2011)

No it's definitely not just you....I only knit for my coworkers this year and again it was to save some money. I knit them each a pair of slippers to go along with some homemade body scrubs that I made. A girls got to be frugal right?
Otherwise yes I do enjoy knitting for others but like you said it's because I have decided I want to do it not because it's Christmas. I've been trying to knit for myself as well. I think I deserve some of my work too!


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## maidinkent (Jul 17, 2011)

Please don't feel mean - just enjoy your knitting. 

Just a thought, if you feel up to it during the year, you could always make those close to you a birthday present, without telling them of course! That way, no pressure on you if it doesn't get done in time - just give it to someone else later in the year x


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## PeaBea (Nov 14, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


 :thumbup:


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## Gidget'smom (Jul 31, 2011)

I think that you are wise not to put pressure on yourself to complete specific Christmas gifts.

One thing I do usually have on hand is knitted cotton dishcloths. If I need a quick, small housewarming gift, or just a little gift, two of these together are great! I have a small stack on in my sewing room at all times.

It's fun knitting them sometimes, and they are quick. Especially the good old diagonal one.


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## pinkrose1969 (Nov 3, 2011)

I so agree with everyone on here you are NOT mean. When I started doing knitting, crochet, looming, and knooking my husband hated it. Then he saw me sell some things. Well he got the idea it could be a money maker. Well he had me doing things every night and I almost lost the excitement of crafting. So you go girl. Stick to your thoughts. T


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## mavisb (Apr 18, 2011)

I have been off this website for a few days because we had a secret santa work, then a secret santa at my scrapbooking night and a girl at work would like me to knit her a shawl for Christmas. 

I made the beret I usually make in red within three days, a nice lacy beanie for the second secret santa and the shawl is over half-way through done. I di the beanie in one day and so far the shawl has taken me three days to knit so far. I am not stressing over getting it finished because I have enough time to get it done before we break up from work by next Friday. I enjoy the knitting and I do it for two hours on the train, to and from and then at night at home. The shawl will be lacy as it is the same pattern as the beanie.


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## PennyCole (Jul 14, 2011)

Dear Dany

No don't put pressure on yourself. I do it all the time, however I have just finished a scarf for a present I started for Christmas last year and my friend is going to get it this year. Had so much else to do it just had to go on the backburner. Don't beat yourself up!!


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## GrammaSheep (Nov 29, 2011)

Listen girlfriend, you are just starting out and you have a LOT of things to learn about knitting AND what kind of knitter you you are(like what kind of mistake you will frog a whole sweater for!) You need to be able to choose your own projects and not be worried about the outcome. I forbid you to take requests for a year. There, now you can tell people you are not allowed. Knitting is the only area of my life where there is no guilt which is only one of the reasons I love it!


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## M2SMRTFORU (Oct 28, 2011)

Daisy, it's really easy. I don't make anything for anyone I know won't either take care of it or appreciate it. I have 4 great grands I would love to do things for but when you see their stuff all over the floor and the dog chewing stuff up it takes the fun of doing it away. It's not just you.


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## yrnjnky (Dec 13, 2011)

I understand how you feel. I can burn out on things and I love knitting . . . so being pressured and obligated can make me start to avoid doing things I previously enjoyed. Tell the people asking for things, that you may get to them later, but you're working on something else so you won't be able to make it before Christmas. Then, if you find the time, and aren't pressured, make it at a later date . . . when they don't expect it.


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## crafty_grandma56 (Jul 26, 2011)

Last year I started various crafts, going back to knitting and crocheting was just two of them. I started with a crocheted doll blanket from my grand-daughter. Even though it was doll size, she loved it. It encouraged me to make a baby blanket for my husband's niece. The whole thing was made in a V pattern, added lace all around it to dress it up. His niece loved it and appreciated it. Her half sister (whom I never really liked) also had a baby. Her mother made a comment that her daughter would love a baby blanket too for her son. So like a fool, I crocheted up another one. Her mother told me it was not as nice as the one I had done for her daughter but she would give it to her anyhow. Her daughter never even sent me a thank you note or called or anything. Her father(my husband,s half-brother made a comment I was too cheap to buy them a gift which really burned me (neither they nor he had ever bought anything for my 3 grandchildren!!!). Her mother said she used to knit but gave up to which I told her maybe she should start again! (since she was so critical of the one I had made) She was and still is angry at me because of my comment. Since then I vowed I would not make anyone anything else. I knit/crochet/sew what I want when I want and if they don't appreciate the time and effort that goes into it, that's their tough luck!


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## suebuddah (Aug 26, 2011)

I haven't made gifts this year, that is mainly because my time has been taken up with a Scrabble rug with the letters I am making for my son, it has taken so long to do, but there is light at the end of the tunnel, the rug just needs the backing put on and I am almost half way to finishing the letters, which I have done a double square then folded them in half and put a stiffener inside, very time consuming, you shouldn't feel guilty it is up to you who you knit for. xx


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## kristym (Nov 21, 2011)

Besides cash and toys I made hats for all my grandchildren(4) and my adult children(2) and several nephews and nieces (4)...I am now making hubby hat and mittens set in his fave color deep blue/grey: one mitten done, one started , and hat is done. 

Once Christmas passes by that is when I turn to something for me during the rest of the winter.
Last year I began an Aran Knit cardigan that I will pick up again - only 2/3 of back is done do far, but I may finsh it in 2012...

This is what I do each year: Make things for everyone else BEFORE Christmas and for me and hubby after that is done.


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## TFurlo (Oct 3, 2011)

I think it gives us more joy/pride to give our knitted gifts to others than it means to the receiver. What gets me is when you put the time/money into something and the recipient doesn't take care of it. I stopped giving knitted items to my daughter and her 3 grandchildren for that reason. The kids loved the things Nana made them, but when they told me mom shrunk hats/mittens and now their stuffed animals are wearing them, I didn't find it as funny as they did and haven't made them anything since. One year I made (sewed) each of them robes and knitted a pair of felted clogs (finished the day before Christmas Eve) I never heard anything about them after the items left my house. I also knitted my grandaughter 2 cute sweaters, never saw them on her either. As much as I love knitting and giving (especially to the grandkids) I stopped, maybe when they get older and can appreciate and take care of things themselves I'll make them things again!


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## silvercharms (Mar 29, 2011)

kmcnaught said:


> Charge them for yarn and labor. These requests should die down


I knitted a nice Brioche stitch hat and scarf set for DH, in multi-blues. He's been wearing it recently to many compliments. So I was taken aback when we had a row the other day to hear him say, 'All this knitting and we never see anything for it!'
So the scarf and hat were taken aback too! I took 'em, and told him pleasantly that if he really wanted them he could buy them back. Result: £6.99 for one scarf, and £6.99 to come for one hat.
Plus the decision that he'll have to pay for anything he wants in future!
I value my work and if he doesn't he won't get any of it, boom boom!


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## Cassius (Dec 2, 2011)

You are not alone. I feel the same. Knitting is suppose to be fun and if I am not enjoying making something in my own time, I go on to something else. 
Happy knitting
Ps I am obsessed also


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## kristym (Nov 21, 2011)

Yup I too agree! When bored with knitting, I paint, or make jewelry, or clean house...then return to a knitting project.
I usually have 2 or 3 of each type craft ongoing at all times <GRIN> Compulsive with all of them!
Check out my paintings at www.kristinmorrill.net to see what I mean LOL


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## LuLuLeesa (Jan 26, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. ....... I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> I....refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do.
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


I have the same problem. I'm a giving person and I love to make things for people, but also, they are very well aware that I'm studying nursing, and like now, this is finals week. I can only squeeze in a little time for knitting and to be honest with you, since I have knitted quite a bit of things for other people, lately -- I have been knitting for myself. I'm making myself a beautiful aron cable blanket and I just made myself some fingerless gloves. I'm going to work on a hat for myself -- why? Because it is getting cold outside. The strange part is that when I am knitting, people always ask me if I can make it for them, or can I make them one...etc. That, after awhile, becomes annoying. Why is it that when I'm working on my hobbie, enjoying myself, trying to relax does everyone feel like I'm obligated to make them something? I mean, it may sound ridiculous but if you seen a wood worker making a beautiful chair, would you tell him to make you one because he hand makes it?

I have lately been working on things that I can enjoy


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## Tresi (Dec 15, 2011)

pinkrose1969 said:


> I so agree with everyone on here you are NOT mean. When I started doing knitting, crochet, looming, and knooking my husband hated it. Then he saw me sell some things. Well he got the idea it could be a money maker. Well he had me doing things every night and I almost lost the excitement of crafting. So you go girl. Stick to your thoughts. T


You knit for joy ... not a job. You aren't mean or selfish or any other negative thing. We've got your back - knit away.


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## Lori Putz (Jul 13, 2011)

It is part of our society that when others know we have a special talent, they will call on us. The problem arises when many call and you only have two hands!
From experience it's best just to pace yourself and keep it to a pace YOU enjoy. I have come to see two piles of knitting: the pile that I enjoy and the pile that I HAVE TO FINISH.


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## yourmother306 (Nov 30, 2011)

Be proud and be happy!


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## yourmother306 (Nov 30, 2011)

I have a large stash of yarn and I have been crocheting for charity. I have joined a knitting club. Some people make items to sell, some to give to grandchildren/children. I'm there crocheting colorful afghans for Project Linus. I started to make a very easy sweater out of varigated yarn, and everyone asked who it was for. I said "I don't know". I loved making that sweater, so I started a new one (only much larger). So everyone asked who it was for. I said "I don't know. The older brother of the girl who would get the other sweater?" To make a long story Longgggger.. I met a knitter who's church donates items to an orphanage in Russia.  Now, I finally know who will get the sweaters. Be proud and be happy! Do what you want, and give to who you want.


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## patocenizo (Jun 24, 2011)

You are not rotten to the core! You are just you and that is okay.


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## Hazel Blumberg - McKee (Sep 9, 2011)

I haven't knit anyone anything for Christmas this year. This year, two people, independently of each other, TOLD me I was knitting something for them. One even presented me with two balls of yarn and told me her mother "put in an order" with me for fingerless gloves. I told her I doubted I'd get to these any time soon--I have a bunch of other projects on the needles, including a vest for my DH.

Another person used the same words, "put in an order" for a coat for her dog. Again, I have no idea when I'll get to this.

I like to knit stuff when I want to, and not when someone "orders" me to. It stresses me out, and who needs stress? How does one deal with situations like this?

Hazel


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## djskatie80 (Nov 12, 2011)

I'm with you. When people ask you to knit them something, just tell them you're too busy, but that you'd love to take some time and teach THEM to knit.


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## Schoeneckwren (Apr 11, 2011)

I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so. . . .

I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....

Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! 


Oh man. Have you been reading my journal??? :lol: I pulled these three statements because I could have written/said any one of them.

I have times when I feel guilty because I want to knit this for myself and I have a line of OTHER PEOPLE to finish first. This Christmas is a bear because I still have more to knit and people keep asking for stuff. YESTERDAY a co worker gave me a pattern she got at Joanne Fabric and asked me if I could make her one, and then gave me another and said "And wouldn't "Mrs. Smith" love one of these?" I have had to decide that next year I will make stuff for people at will and keep more for myself. Maybe it is not selfish but honoring that I want to show off what i've made too. My husband keeps joking that he's the only Irishman he knows with a knitting wife and NO cable vest to wear. (He's the only Irishman he knows with a knitting wife, btw.)

Maybe we need to start a support group: Knitters who proudly wear their own creations.



Peace
Wren :thumbup:


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## tyratim (Oct 17, 2011)

Hi Dany, It look like we live practically around the corner from each other. At least in this cyber world, a few miles is nothing. I live in Magnolia. It is a small world, and I embrace every person The Lord puts in my path. I admire your commitment to not wanting to put pressure on yourself. It has taken me almost 52 years to get to that point, but by His Grace, I am content with the fact that I do not need to please everyone. I put my time in His Hands and that is all I need. Do not put yourself down because you can not accomplish what it has taken others many years to accomplish. Enjoy your knitting experience and grow at your own pace. Blessing to you and thank you for sharing.


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## tamarque (Jan 21, 2011)

It is a strange phenomenon I find that when you have a skill, people seem to feel they can access it when they want. Not true! The corollary is that when we have a skill, we feel we need to give it away--definitely a feminist with which to contend. We have no responsibility to perform on cue and knitting for this holiday season is like that--unless that is truely where your heart is.


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## phammitt (Oct 30, 2011)

Instead of giving everything away except for charity, I charge for my scarves and cowls. People that don't want to learn to knit are willing to pay for it. I let them chose the colors and I tell them I will have it as soon as I finish whatever orders I have ahead of them. They are willing to wait and it helps extend our budget...You are not a grinch. I just learned that they can pay for my experience, except the gifts I make for family. Merry Christmas and don't stress out! Jesus is the reason for the season - remember that!
Pam


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## gramknits (Aug 3, 2011)

Hi Dany, Just keep doing what you are doing. There is nothing worse than turning something you Love to do into something you HAVE to do. The stress becomes a lead weight on your shoulders - and that is not fun. A family crisis forced me to put down my Christmas gift projects because someone needed my help. I redirected those projects into "maybe they will be birthday gift items" instead. Once the crisis passed, I realized what an unreasonable demand I was putting on myself to try to finish all those gifts for Christmas. Now I'm stress free, enjoying the coming holiday again, and have made two items for MYSELF. Best of all I know the gifts will get done eventually and I will be back to enjoying making them!


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## joanh8060 (Apr 22, 2011)

It's called self-knowledge and its supposed to be a sign of maturity...emotional maturity...we all know just exactly how "mature" we are calendarwise....
You are trying to preserve the feeling that this is fun which is very wise. 
Joan 8060


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## schmitty59 (Dec 15, 2011)

Brava!! I used to put pressure on myself because I have a sister-in-law who is an incredible knitter and my things look home made!! But then I reminded myself that there is love in every stitch and only make things for those who will really appreciate the effort. Knitting should only be for enjoyment - yours and others!! No pressure!!


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## tyratim (Oct 17, 2011)

gramknits said:


> Hi Dany, Just keep doing what you are doing. There is nothing worse than turning something you Love to do into something you HAVE to do. The stress becomes a lead weight on your shoulders - and that is not fun. A family crisis forced me to put down my Christmas gift projects because someone needed my help. I redirected those projects into "maybe they will be birthday gift items" instead. Once the crisis passed, I realized what an unreasonable demand I was putting on myself to try to finish all those gifts for Christmas. Now I'm stress free, enjoying the coming holiday again, and have made two items for MYSELF. Best of all I know the gifts will get done eventually and I will be back to enjoying making them!


Praise God that your crisis has passed and for the realization that was revealed to you because of it. Sometimes we forget just how Loving and Awesome God is. We need to count all of our blessings even though some may not seem that way. If we always look for the good in bad, then is should be counted as Victory!

Enjoy your Christmas Blessing all through the year!


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## mom2grif (Oct 19, 2011)

You sound just right to me. Knit for the joy of it! And the fact that you are giving everything away shows a generous spirit. You are NOT rotten!


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## JoyceinNC (Oct 28, 2011)

ireneofnc said:


> dannyxx,
> 
> No, you are not mean or rotten to think that way. I have/am experiencing the same thing. I love to knit and give away things that I've made. But, I tell you, it's a totally different feeling when you have people ask for things; indeed it does bring about stress and feelings of pressure.
> 
> ...


Ditto! There was a time, many years ago, I made all the Christmas gifts. It was more acceptable then, but not now. I agree with the post above about some people just being lazy or wanting to benefit from our labor. I've had that happen also. My daughter doesn't want me to sew or knit for her children unless it matches exactly what is in the stores. Which is almost impossible to do anymore. That's why I love charity knitting! The smiles and excitement when a little boy or girl and their mom find a sweater or hat they really love (that I have made) makes it all worth while. People also tell me I should sell what I make instead of donating it. Let me tell you, if you're not a knitter, you won't understand the time involved and probably won't pay for that time. I think it is better to give what we make to people we know will appreciate it and enjoy using it (whatever "it" is).


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## dijewe (Mar 1, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


Nope, you're in good company. I don't knit for anyone unless its in my own timeframe. I don't even succumb to flattery LOL 
Knitting for me is for the enjoyment of the craft - I am very much technique oriented person and usually knit stuff to try something new. Not a good person to churn out barrels of the same item as I get bored and probably wouldn't do it. 
I knit what I want and when its done, if there are any takers, I give it to them.


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## bellestarr12 (Mar 26, 2011)

Don't feel guilty! Knitting is a pleasure and you are sharing your pleasure and showing you care by giving things to appreciative people. You are not selfish, you're sensible. One of the constant topics on this forum is how to deal with the pressure of people thinking they have a right to ask you for things (another is how to deal with people's ingratitude). 

You don't need to apologize or explain to anyone, though sometimes, to those in the first group, I just smile sweetly and say something along the lines of "oh, gosh, I'm afraid it would be a long wait as I already have so many projects in the queue."


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## johannecw (Oct 25, 2011)

Hi,
I think you should be proud of yourself because you are doing what makes you feel good. You are protecting the joy you have for knitting rather than creating a ton of stress trying to finish things according to a timetable. I say, "Good job and keep it up!"


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## Klockie (Sep 20, 2011)

Hi Dany! Glad to meet you. I'm from Turnersville NJ also.
Small world.


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## lawrencji (Nov 4, 2011)

You are a wise woman indeed. It would be a sad thing to lose the joy you get from knitting.


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## Annsb (May 16, 2011)

RebeccaMoe said:


> danyxx2421 said:
> 
> 
> > Isis, I just started a short cardigan for myself. My skills have not gotten to that level yet, I have to say I"m a bit jealous...lol! I understand about the gifts and saving money that makes perfect sense I just didn't want to put pressure on myself especially when people seem like they don't appreciate the time it takes us to complete some things!
> ...


I totally agree with you


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## msacco53 (Nov 26, 2011)

I do understand the pressure thing. You could start knitting Christmas gifts after the new year and then you would feel no pressure. Good luck solving your dilemna.


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## pocono.carol (Nov 30, 2011)

danyxx2421, do not concern yourself about knitting on demand. Knit what your want for whom you want, period the end. We all knit for the pleasure of it. I love to knit for friends and family that appreciate the work involved. Yes, we are all asked by people, "can you make me..." I always tell them I have many projects on my list before them and offer to teach them how to knit. 

Relax, enjoy, and do what feels comfortable to you. We are all here to support and encourage each other. Now go to your favorite LYS and play with the beautiful yarn.


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## Cassius (Dec 2, 2011)

I have also quit knitting for others. Nobody appreciates my work more than me. I wait for someone to ask for it. I have one good friend who just loves anything I do. She is fun to knit for. I have two grandchildren and look forward to the day when they are old enuf and beg me to make something for them or even show them how to make their own. 
I think the thank you note/email has gone out of style. 
I am now making an afghan for each of my grandkids and the laprob is going to live at my house.  unless they someday request to take it home


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## Edith M (Aug 10, 2011)

You are not mean or rotten. People, even friends and fsmily, sometimes forget the time, effort and money that goes into our work. As others have suggested you can offer to teach them, put them on a list of things to knit or quote a price for the finished article. I have even told them to purchase the yarn, pattern and whatever embelishment are needed. After they bring me the items with the reciept I tell them my price for the finished article will be 2x the total on the reciept. Often by the time they have picked up the items and tallied the cost they decide they can't afford it. I just smile and think to myself, "now you know why I can't do it " Edith


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## billb1946 (Nov 23, 2011)

When it began to look like I could actually make something with my knitting my wife started telling me I should make this or that. Finally I told her that i will make what appeals to me and I was not going to take requests. Like you I have given most everything I make away. I trapped myself this year into making things for my daughter and grand daughters and am now under the gun to get finished. I won't do that again!!


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## RoxyCatlady (Mar 22, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


Don't feel bad. I'm the same way. I am a process knitter, rather than product knitter. Which means, I enjoy the knitting process. Doesn't matter what I'm making, who it is for, or when it needs to be finished. This usually means, that I end up with a lot of UFO's, though - I get excited about a new yarn, new style, new technique, or some such, and I am off and running on a new project instead of the old one. Maybe I need the discipline of a deadline, lol. On the other hand, though - I have no problem making something for someone and giving it to them as a gift. But if they pay me for it, then I feel that there are obligations, deadlines, etc. and I no longer enjoy the making. It turns it into work instead of a pass time. I knit to relax, not to stress.

This year, I did end up making some Christmas gifts - hats for the family. But, it started because I saw a cute pattern I thought I'd have fun making for my grandson - I did, and got a request from hubby for a hat the same - then from son who saw his dad wearing his - so I figured, since I was making GS a hat as a surprise, then I couldn't give DS a hat before GS, and since I was doing those two, I couldn't leave out the three GD's - which meant that then, DIL would be left out - by the time I'd made all those hats, I figured, I deserved a new hat, too.... Since each hat only really took up an evening to make, it wasn't that much pressure... and, aside from a couple ends to weave in, they're all done already.

In the event that a non-family or close friend makes a special request for an item, I will often say no problem, but the person must supply the yarn, and I will keep the leftovers as payment. I did that recently with a hat and mitten set - but the person insisted on over-paying for the yarn (she'd asked me to buy it, since she didn't know where or what type, etc. to get) as payment for the set. I tried to refuse the extra, but she wouldn't hear of it. Oh, well...  I'm still not fond of being paid for knitting - it really does take the fun out of it for me ....


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## User5935 (Feb 9, 2011)

Could be worse, you could have started telling people of your intentions like I did! I was mentally preoccupied these past few months, and physically drained most nights as I have 3 young kids, one of which is home all day and decided to stop napping this past year (oddly only at home though, if we have to run an errand she'll pass out in the car!) and a very busy husband. By the time the kids are in bed and I can relax, I usually want to zone out, and I can't knit well enough to do the two a tthe same time yet. *sigh*.... III have guilt! :|


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## msusanc (Apr 5, 2011)

You are absolutely right in what you are doing and saying -- keep your knitting fun! It's YOUR hobby, after all.


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## Dlclose (Jun 26, 2011)

Deb-Babbles said:


> I do mostly charity knitting. Yes, I make things for my children and grandchildren all the time. Bad for me though is I can not wait to give it to them. People who ask that I make something I have to tell them, I will when I can but I can teach you if you need it faster.
> I do try to make sure I have knitting done for the just in case type of gift. One never knows when a new items might be needed.


I'm in awe! I'm always trying to " catch up"! I never have " just in case" things done because every project I start has someone's "name" on it. I mean I only do the projects with someone in mind and an occasion to give it. It causes me to be "under the gun" to finish often, but I take on projects that stretch my ability and become a better knitter/crocheter due to it. I love to work a project for someone else as a gift! I don't think I would want to do it for pay, though.


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## bonster (Jan 28, 2011)

For some reason I do not receive any of the updates of posts today! I think someone some time ago mentioned the same thing happened to them. I did email the admin of the problem. I did not receive a single update today. I hope I didn't click on the wrong thing somewhere! I would really miss this site if I messed up! I would be sad.


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## Kathie (Mar 29, 2011)

I find it much more satisfying to knit things as a surprise happy happy for people than to have a specific occasion that becomes a deadline project. I don't want to turn my hobby into a job. Why put pressure on yourself? People are always pleased to get an unexpected gift.


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## bonster (Jan 28, 2011)

Now I am really confused - I just got this reply. Curiouser and curiouser!


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## Trouble (Mar 30, 2011)

There is such a thing as knitting burnout. I'm starting to feel it myself.


danyxx2421 said:


> Thanks friends I appreciate your thoughts, I was starting to feel guilty...!


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## rfmoor (Dec 1, 2011)

I don't knit for Christmas anymore. when someone compliments a scarf or hat, including the color...I take it off and give it to them. Or I ask what's their favorite color and then make them one in my time.


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

Don't feel guilty, knit for your pleasure... and if it pleases you to knit for others and give your knits away... lucky them. And, do knit for yourself, as much as you want. And, when you want to knit for others... then do it. Don't make it hard for yourself... this is supposed to be a fun skill. Have fun; enjoy life and knitting. 

I don't knit Xmas gifts, per se. But, some may get a knitted gift in December. It's all part of the on-going schedule. I knit for whomever I want and they get it whenever it done. And, the recipient is always happy to receive it. 

I don't feel guilty, unless I have "promised" a child something and it takes forever to get it completed, because I let other projects squeeze inbetween. I don't do this very often.

Well said, Colorado knits... no unrealistic projects and timelines.


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Yes, I did the same thing last year - and felt bad, but it actually put me in more of a "love" with my knitting & crocheting! I was determined to knit year round! Not just from September through March, then get in a funk as the weather was warmer! I made 36 items this way, and I have gifts to go to and pick out for someone. So...look at it like this...find some patterns you like, and just start working toward next year in a relaxed state of mind - that next year you will be "ready"! Just enjoy the pleasure of knitting...it's o'kay... :thumbup:


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## marileej (Dec 4, 2011)

I agree with you. I am finishing some pot holders/dish clothes as stocking stuffers, and AG doll sweaters and hats. That is it. I feel like I am being a Scrooge, but there is only so much time, and the holidays can be overwhelming as is. It is supposed to be a time of joy. So for those that want a hand crafted item, they will get one of my traditional fabric stockings with a potholder/dish cloth and filled with other treats and an I.O.U to be created after the holidays.


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## Jillpr (Mar 15, 2011)

I was telling my SIL last month that I was making socks for myself, she quickly said that her daughter had a pair oh handmade socks and always talked about how warm and cozy they were and how their house is always drafty in winter and how there are so many of them in the house and that they all would love a pair of warm socks for Christmas. I have offered to teach this lady to knit and crochet many times and she always tells me that my work is so much prettier than hers and that I do handwork so much better than she, but that her "thing" is quilting, while mine is knit and crochet. I didn't know until then that our talents should only be limited to what someone else wants us to do. I love all types of crafting and always will. I am making the socks however, and so far have made 4 pair, with 4 more pair to go, but will never do this again. Doubt if i get them done for Christmas, but when they are finished I am making some for me! I have made the mistake of letting my DSIL (hint) me in to doing for her (again). Lookout 2012 It is the year that I decide what and who I do for! It isn't just you darlin' Just hang in there and for heaven's sake, let's all make a pact to do what pleases Us alone before we lose our love of knitting!


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## karla knoll (Aug 5, 2011)

You sound so grounded and I admire you for it! I always intend to knit something each month and put back for xmas but find myself not doing it and then putting pressure on myself the 2 months before xmas. I am going to try and stick to it in 2012!(once again)


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## tricotmonique (Dec 2, 2011)

Colorado knits said:


> This year I made our grandson a Wallaby sweater; for others I made one pair of socks, a pair of leg warmers with matching hat, and 3 other hats.
> 
> I briefly though about getting a couple other things made and decided that I do not need the stress.
> 
> ...


You aare very wise not to force yourself. Here's waht I do.... maybe not for you.... One way I deal with this ambivalence is to knit only things that I like to knit. Of course all that knitting happens vers 12 months. . Then I put all of them in a nice basket. When one of my target recipient is coming over, I offer him oor her to choose one item that she/he likes. This way, I don't have to deal withstyle and colour. Actually on one Christmas. I brought the basket at the house where I was invited for the dinner. Twenty guests just were totally hilarious to have such an abundance. Monique


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## Sorlenna (Feb 17, 2011)

Jillpr said:


> I didn't know until then that our talents should only be limited to what someone else wants us to do. I love all types of crafting and always will. Lookout 2012 It is the year that I decide what and who I do for!


 :thumbup: Ditto! I do any craft I choose, too. Love that first sentence there!


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## Sorlenna (Feb 17, 2011)

tricotmonique said:


> One way I deal with this ambivalence is to knit only things that I like to knit. Of course all that knitting happens vers 12 months. . Then I put all of them in a nice basket. When one of my target recipient is coming over, I offer him oor her to choose one item that she/he likes. This way, I don't have to deal withstyle and colour. Actually on one Christmas. I brought the basket at the house where I was invited for the dinner. Twenty guests just were totally hilarious to have such an abundance. Monique


My BF has lots of kids, steps, and grands--I'm sending them a box full of hats & fingerless mitts and everyone can choose one...any leftovers will be donated by them to the organization of their choice. I've been working on the items since August.


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## adora (Jul 20, 2011)

You are not alone !!!! Knitting is my passion and I do a lot of knitting for charity but as soon as someone asks me to knit something for them I totally freeze. I don't know what it is but it's just not the same yet I've had people offer to pay me nicely for my stuff !!!! Go figure....... :?


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## MarySandra (Mar 23, 2011)

Today I'm starting my last requested present and hopefully I will never do this to myself again. I've only been knitting for three years and this is the first time it just hasn't been fun. How do you say no to people you really like but your not 16 hours worth of knitting friends?


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## knittingpagan (Aug 15, 2011)

Hey dani don't feel bad about not making things for christmas or telling them no at other times too. If they want something tell them to buy the yarn themselves and get in line because you have other things you are making too. They will either be willing to do so or you saved yourself a project. ever give anyone a timeline for a project to be done, life can get in the way, that'll save you from feeling pressured to finish. I made gifts this christmas just posted pics too because we just moved in Oct and $ is nonexistant let alone tight so i used my stash for the kids in the family i know there parents will be tickled that i made them. enjoy knitting don't stress.


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## LindaLeeHawking (May 14, 2011)

I have totally felt that way this year too. Even about my beading - I have projects sitting there but I do not feel like pressuring myself to have them done by any certain time.
I am also finishing my 4th sweater for myself - they are all different - some are crocheted and the others are knitted and this is a first for me - to keep my projects for myself.
I feel that this is a good thing.



danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


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## eneurian (May 4, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


you are absolutely right about the pressure and time deadlines. i used to do commision needlework (i needed the money) and it completely took the joy out of it. it was a long time before i did anything for fun and i still don't like to sew anymore (i was a costumer) i can barely get mending done. there's a saying that if you love what you do you'll never work a day. that's stupid, if you 'HAVE' to do it it's work and you'll begin to resent it eventually!!!


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## 2sticksofwood (Oct 2, 2011)

I also have very few things I've made...I make sweaters and my kids see them and they wind up in their drawer. But I also just LOVE to see them wearing the things I've made and when someone asks them about them I love hearing the pride in their voices when they say "My Mom made this". When I quote people the price I would charge for materials and time most people quickly drop the subject of me making them a sweater. I don't feel the slightest bit bad about doing that either. I find it amazing that some people think that an alpaca sweater, if it is handmade should cost about $20 and your time should be free. Go figure!!
Knit for your self, the ones you love, and/or a cause you think is good and don't stress about the rest.


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## christine flo (Apr 11, 2011)

i agree totaly


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## Roseymae (Nov 23, 2011)

No, you are not rotten to the core. You seem to be sensible to me. I read all these and had things I wanted to reply to but I had to get registered & lost most of what I wanted to say. I am probably a bit older than most of you so I guess it was a Senoir Moment. Rosey


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## Homeshppr (Feb 28, 2011)

It's almost too late this year to worry about knitted gift-giving, but you can start making a list now for projects you might like to gift next year. Half the fun is planning the perfect gift for each loved one, searching for a pattern you're excited to try, then shopping for a beautiful yarn to make it. Your money is never wasted if you know in advance what you're going to create and who will receive it.

Personally, I'm already planning to master socks in the New Year and to create some beautiful hat, scarf glove sets for my grown daughters in something soft, warm and cuddly.


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## PamP (Nov 6, 2011)

When I quote people the price I would charge for materials and time most people quickly drop the subject of me making them a sweater. I don't feel the slightest bit bad about doing that either. I find it amazing that some people think that an alpaca sweater, if it is handmade should cost about $20 and your time should be free. Go figure!!
I understand this sentiment all to well. It why I quit selling my chain maille jewelry. People wanted to pay $20 for something that had more than $20 worth of silver in it, never mind my labor. I don't make for other people except special circumstances but I am ready, willing and able to teach them to make it themselves. Some people are intimidated when it comes to learning something new and others are just lazy. The ones who are intimidated, I work with. Forget about the others. It took me many, many years to learn this lesson.


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## grandma of 5 (Sep 14, 2011)

You are ok not to make christmas presents. I don't. I just knit hats,mitten and scarfs as sets and take them to our local schools and let them give the sets out to the students that don't/can't afford to buy any. This year I gave a local school 35 sets. It feels really good to know that I am helping people who really need the help and not family members who maybe will like what I gaive them but them maybe not.


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## nancyk (Aug 2, 2011)

These posts have made me feel a whole lot better. I knit for pleasure and like to have something to do. I prefer to decide for myself if I am going to make a gift or not.
Like everybody else, I have given away most of what I have done, keeping a few special pieces for myself. What really ripped it was when I was asked to make a sweater for a friend and she said she had told friends I "just whipped them out." 
Obviously, she has no idea how long it takes and what a commitment it is. I made the sweater, but I resented every stitch. The next time, I will say "if you buy the yarn in the color you want, I will do it." I know this person will be stopped with even that little request.


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## Cindy M (Sep 5, 2011)

I started making hats for my kids and stressed out on whether I would get them done in time for Christmas or not. I'm setting them aside. If it's after Christmas, oh well. It gets done when it gets done. I'm putting in more hours at work for the Christmas rush and just don't have the time to do it. I ordered movie dvd's for the kids for Christmas from Amazon online in my pjs in the comfort of my own home. They are shipping them so I don't have to fight the crowds in long checkout lines, look for parking spaces, wrap presents, and wait in line at the post office. Be easy and stress free on yourself this Christmas.


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## M2SMRTFORU (Oct 28, 2011)

Have you ever thought about asking her to trade a quilt for the socks since she wants so many pair. Should be about an equal trade for the work and materials. Bet she backpedals really rapidly. LOL


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## gramknits (Aug 3, 2011)

tyratim said:


> gramknits said:
> 
> 
> > Hi Dany, Just keep doing what you are doing. There is nothing worse than turning something you Love to do into something you HAVE to do. The stress becomes a lead weight on your shoulders - and that is not fun. A family crisis forced me to put down my Christmas gift projects because someone needed my help. I redirected those projects into "maybe they will be birthday gift items" instead. Once the crisis passed, I realized what an unreasonable demand I was putting on myself to try to finish all those gifts for Christmas. Now I'm stress free, enjoying the coming holiday again, and have made two items for MYSELF. Best of all I know the gifts will get done eventually and I will be back to enjoying making them!
> ...


Amen Tyratim, and Merry Christmas and a blessed new year to you!


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

YOU CAN DO IT...& IT'S FUN FINDING THE WINTER CLEARANCE YARN IN THE SPRING - YOU SAVE EVEN MORE $$, KEEP KNITTING WITH PLEASURE AND HAVE THE GIFTS TO GIVE BY CHRISTMAS! :lol:


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## Hazel Blumberg - McKee (Sep 9, 2011)

adora said:


> You are not alone !!!! Knitting is my passion and I do a lot of knitting for charity but as soon as someone asks me to knit something for them I totally freeze. I don't know what it is but it's just not the same yet I've had people offer to pay me nicely for my stuff !!!! Go figure....... :?


Adora, I couldn't agree more. I totally freeze when people ask me to knit something for them. I freeze even more when people actually have the gall to TELL me I'm going to knit something for them.

The dog sweater, which is for my SIL's dog, MAY get knitted sometime, but as I told her, it's definitely not going to get done any time near Christmas.

The other "present," where a friend told me to knit fingerless gloves for her mother because her mother had "put in an order" that I do so, well, that one's never going to get done. I'm probably going to give her the yarn back. As it was, I told her that it'd be over a year before I could ever get to the fingerless gloves.

I don't think that people have a clue how long it takes to knit something--if they're not knitters, that is. And I don't think they realize that we either have to look up or make up a pattern, do gauge swatches, etc. They have NO idea what goes into knitting something.

On the other hand, DH requests so few things, and he knows how long knitting takes. So, when he requests something, I greatly enjoy doing that for him. That's a different situation completely.

I think I'll wait till after Christmas and then give the friend back her mother's yarn for the fingerless gloves. (The yarn is hideous and horrible to work with--I've knitted with one of the yarns before--and she came up with two different yarns, so that I'd do one glove in one color and one in the other. These two yarns would never look good together as a set. When I mentioned that they wouldn't, the friend said, "Oh, just use something that you have on hand.") No offer to pay, no "please," no "thank you." At least my SIL showed gratitude and appreciation! Still, I'm not wild about that "request" either, which kind of came over as a demand.

Grrrrrr.

I think that, to cover these situations in the future, I'm gonna make a blanket statement to people who ask/demand something: "I'm sorry, but I don't take knitting requests."

Hazel


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

I agree that it is harder to do commissioned knitting. I recently completed about 6 earwarmers that were requested with specific yarn, colors & flowers and buttons. I now know that I much rather make what I think someone will love and give it to them vs. what they tell me! Does that sound awful!? I just find it less stressful. :roll:


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## itip2 (Dec 2, 2011)

I kntr for gifts- this year 0 pairs of socks, down from 14 last year as I ran out of time. I have a request list too, if I have extra!
Isabel


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## ladyjag (Oct 16, 2011)

I agree! It's just too stressful trying to get gifts done. Something always comes up that interferes with the knitting!!
Knitting something and giving it away to someone is just as nice and just as thoughtful.


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## barrettb2 (Nov 21, 2011)

Dany,
You are NOT rotton! I knit for relaxation and self-worth (don't know where that came from) I take things to art and craft shows to sell and will do commission work. I am just now starting to make things for myself - well after another scarf for one of my sons that he asked me to do. I started a sweater for myself 4 years ago - still a work in progress and I'm afraid to pick it up again as it was a "I'm just making up the pattern as I go" thing and I"m sure I didn't write everything, if any of it, down anywhere.
Four years ago I started on hip surgery that turned into a nightmare of hospitals, nursing homes, infections, etc. etc. and I lost three years of my life. There were so many friends who brought me food and helped me. So, I took out 30 or so scarves and put them all on the dining room table and as friends came over I would have them just pick out a scarf as my gift for the friendship they had shown me when I needed it so much. That was a really good feeling. 
Another thought on this - I refuse to use cheap yarn. If I'm going to put all that time and effort into something, I want it to be, what I consider, "nice" when its finished. NO pound packages for me. I have found several websites where you can get the good stuff cheaper than the regular stores' junk yarn. It just takes the time to look. I am amazed at some prices that are put on yarns. My goodness, a sweater would cost a couple hundred just in yarn. Are there that many people who actually spend that much on the materials? - back to the subject - 
So, if you can't just enjoy the art/craft then why do it at all? But to put pressure on with deadlines? - I won't do it either!


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## LizAnne (Nov 25, 2011)

I give away everything I make also and I can even start making something for myself and before I finish I've thought of who I want to give it to. I do at times get tense and my joy leaves me. I keep 5 or 6 projects going at all times and I switch back and forth among them. I had one lady from my church ask me to knit her a scarf which I did. I didn't get to attend the church function so I sent it. I've never heard from her. I even called her and left a message on her voice mail asking if she liked it and left my phone number. She never called. Most people are very appreciative and God knows I get great joy out of making people happy. I know we bring him joy. Knitting is a labor of LOVE. Always make it your joy. This is a great site where we can always be appreciated.


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## Blue52 (Dec 13, 2011)

I second that--we think if we're not "in service" to others we're being selfish. I also think that no one (except maybe another knitter) can appreciate the work that goes into a handmade item. I just knit a cowl for my niece at her request and I hated the pressure. I'm sticking to my own projects from now on!


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## Phoenix (Oct 2, 2011)

I started crocheting again after NOT crocheting for over 30 years...and I seem to always have something in my hand working on it....but I can't seem to finish a "set" of anything to give as gifts...LOL...like I told mama879 the other day...I get obsessed with trying new stitches and then lose interest as soon as I master it...LOL


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## Jillpr (Mar 15, 2011)

M2SMRTFORU said:


> Have you ever thought about asking her to trade a quilt for the socks since she wants so many pair. Should be about an equal trade for the work and materials. Bet she backpedals really rapidly. LOL


Yes,I have thought of that but she always tells me she has a long list to make for and can't possibly get to it right now, which then, right now never comes, so I just have gotten to the point where I just don't bother asking. Oh well, I have learned my lesson. Will stay quietly to myself from now on. :lol:


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## Candykiss02 (Nov 5, 2011)

I don't keep much that I make neither. I make to give away and I like you love to see happy faces on the receiving end. I give to charities all the time also. This makes me so happy.


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## lindaknits (Mar 18, 2011)

Then I am rotten too!! I love to knit, quilt and crochet, but I want to do it on my schedule! 

I took a shopping bag full of scarves and hats to a friend who works with domestic abuse charity. She had a fit over them - made me feel good. But I did them on my schedule.


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## diamondbelle (Sep 10, 2011)

Knitting is your hobby, not your job. Just because you have a skill that someone else doesn't have does not mean that you are required to make things for them.

A good analogy is having a friend who is a gourmet cook. Would you expect them to provide gourmet meals for you - for free - including the cost of ingredients and labor? NO!

So, don't feel guilty - knit for those who appreciate it or who need it.

Most of my knitting is charity knitting and I don't see the faces of people who receive my projects. But that's fine with me. Hubby was thrilled when I made him a pair of slippers last week.


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## Bronwyn (Mar 18, 2011)

G'day Danyxx2421, Agree with you: the last thing you want to do is to put pressure on yourself and take the pleasure out of a wonderful hobby. My name is Bronwyn and I've been knitting on and off since I was 8 and enjoy many arts and crafts.


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## danyxx2421 (Jan 24, 2011)

Wow, I'm so glad I'm not the only one out there that feels this way. 

I would never have the guts to tell someone to make me something, I mean just because I post a picture of what I have done doesn't mean I'm taking orders...lol!

Thanks again for all of the feed back, its good to know Im not alone and/or a scrooge!!!


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## julietremain (Jul 8, 2011)

great responses from all.....part of the reason I knit is to relieve stress...and, of course, pure enjoyment...I keep alot of what I knit..but I also give things away....BUT..no one is entitled to my time or my talent...and I NEVER knit under a time restriction....when a project is finished, it's finished...sometimes I even frog a project and start over for the pure pleasure of working with a particular yarn...when someone asks if I sell what I make or will sell them what I'm wearing(!!) I always decline...and sometimes explain how THEY could make one....I never feel guilty and I throughly enjoy my knitting and I never feel guilty..that's just me..
julie


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Yeah, when I get "hit" is when friends see me KIP and ask what I'm working on...then ask if I can make some for them to give as Christmas gifts - which puts me under time constraints, and makes it hard for me to finish the other gifts I'm making to give others - from me! I've learned this year - unless they ask me in October - is "aint" gonna happen!


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## kinneytaw (Dec 7, 2011)

Don't knit under pressure! It is not worth it. Knit only because you enjoy it and don't worry about those who think you should knit them something and then do not act like they appreciate it. They won't take care of it. Do not waste your time on them. Make yourself something you really want to wear/use.  
I speak from experiece. I went thru that when I first started to knit. 
Make a habit of treating yourself to something every once in a while. Enjoy your knitting to the max. :thumbup:


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## NMKnittinggrani (Jun 25, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


I couldn't agree with you more!! If you are rotton then there are two of us. I do this because it is fun and I enjoy it. When you have pressure to do a certain amount by a certain time it takes the fun out of it, trust me!!! I did stuff for a friend's Christmas booth at a craft fair recently and by the time I was done I was so frustrated and not having fun - NEVER AGAIN. I do what I want, when I want, for whom I want and don't see that changing ever. NOW, I did have a granddaughter text me a picture of an ear warmer and asked if it was something I could do for her, "if it's not too much trouble and when you have time." Needless to say it was in the mail in about three days. (picture attached) I even taught myself to crochet just enough to make the flower. I have never kept anything for myself either but have decided I am making me a scarf when I am finished with the other "want to do" things I am working on right now. You go girl!! This is supposed to be fun so don't let anyone cheat you out of it.


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## Amozetti (Nov 22, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


Honey, you're not rotten, just realistic! The holiday's are so hectic with all the added responsibilities, that there just isn't enough time in the day! I just went out wearing a scarf I just got finished and realized it was a friend-of-a-friends b-day! I gave her my scarf and 5 other people at the table wanted me to knit them one! I told them that this Christmas was out of the question, and possibly i could get them done by 2014! They all laughed and said that would be ok! I keep the bigger projects that I make (afghans) simply because of the time involved, but I make it clear that if I knit something for someone, they'll get it whenever I get it done! NO ONE has ever had a problem with it......they just love that it is made just for them!!! RELAX! You are as normal as they come!!!! :lol:


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## bettywald (Apr 6, 2011)

This is the only break from reality I have, I am a caretaker and spouse for a COPD husband. I make what I want and for others that appreciate what I do. I have to ask anyone except family for money for projects. Refuse to take this to a job and protect your special time. At 66 it took me a long time to believe I DO have rights ,for all women stop being a dormat and find your timd!


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## run4fittness (May 22, 2011)

I "only" made 6 gifts this year. It is usually two to three times that. I don't want to overload everyone! Also with working on the cross stitch for Gwen (tapestry) I haven't done that much.

Just wait until next year!


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## CamillaDesertMouse (Mar 19, 2011)

No way Dany ..are you rotten to the core....cause IF you are...you have plenty of company with us lol

I have made knitted, crochet, painted etc..gifts over the years...and sad to say not all were taken care of or even kept...Feel guilty...heck NO..
Guilt is something we NOW give OUR children lol...I think it is called "payback"...

I NOW knit, crochet, etc...just for hubby, house, furry babys and ME...(note me is last again) lol

NO pressure here...I do NOT do drama or pressure lol
IF others "want" you to make something for them..offer to TEACH them...lol you will see them running away lol

For goodness sake...KNIT something just for YOU!!!
Hugs and God Bless all,

Camilla



danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


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## CatKnit (Sep 5, 2011)

I don't mind a deadline for charity knitting but other than that knit only what I want, mostly for me and DH, I love making topdown sweaters and scarves but finish at my own pace. Once I did a special request, a Harry Potter scarf--never again, I was asked right before Thanksgiving to make it as a Christmas present--it was the most boring piece I have ever done, needless to say it ended up as a Valentine's Day gift.


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Cute headband - did you have a pattern for this one - love it! :-


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Ha! :lol: I'm now going to try a top down sweater over Christmas - for me! - since some of you have mentioned it. I pulled a few free patterns from internet - if you know of a super easy - tried and true pattern that is free - please let me know! Thank you & let's all remember - KNITTING IS FOR PLEASURE!


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## Mamajan (Nov 29, 2011)

i am a giver also .I have no idea what happened to the dozens of cross stitch things i did .Or the amount of clothes I made for so called friends'in the past .I have begun to knit again ,slippers almost ready for a dil jumper next for a 2 1/2 year old child .I have not told them and you put it so succintley how you wont pressure yourself,something I am wont to do.Reading yours I know now i wont do it again.Thanks you.It takes all the joy out of it.


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## danyxx2421 (Jan 24, 2011)

Thank you all...I truly love this site and the fact that everyone is so very nice. Even when someone doesn't agree with you they do it in a nice way. 

This site is definitely one of my "happy places"!


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## Wynn11 (Jul 20, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


Yes, I feel this way, but trying to be able to give something I have knit gifts. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to knit everyone something so I don't want to give what I've made. It's driving me crazy. It's taken the pleasure out of knitting.


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## CatKnit (Sep 5, 2011)

saingxmom said:


> Ha! :lol: I'm now going to try a top down sweater over Christmas - for me! - since some of you have mentioned it. I pulled a few free patterns from internet - if you know of a super easy - tried and true pattern that is free - please let me know! Thank you & let's all remember - KNITTING IS FOR PLEASURE!


The patterns from Knitting Pure and Simple are the best you can buy a download from their web-site or purchase at your LYS--not expensive and definitley the best topdow patterns, very clear easy to follow, no sewing at the end!


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## danyxx2421 (Jan 24, 2011)

saingxmom said:


> Cute headband - did you have a pattern for this one - love it! :-


which headband friend?


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## Hazel Blumberg - McKee (Sep 9, 2011)

I'm so glad we're having this discussion! 

I knit for various reasons--don't we all?--but stress relief is a biggie for me. I recently restarted my own business (it'd been dormant when I came down with fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome, and now I'm feeling somewhat better and can take on some of the challenges of self-employment again), and when I'm done for the day, the last thing I want is stress. Knitting helps me get into that "zone" where I feel relaxed and where my troubles are far away. Sometimes then ideas come to me about how to solve work problems. 

But knitting's about the most relaxed part of my day, and I don't want others' demands on my knitting time to take away that pleasure. That may be selfish, but hey, I don't care! 

Thanks again to the knitter who started this excellent and thought-provoking discussion!

Happy holidays to all,
Hazel


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

The cute pink one with the gold buttons you posted.


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## hennalady (Nov 12, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> This site is the best ever, thanks everyone!


I posted in another thread this very topic. All my knitting and crochet this year has gone to charity. My friends are getting bags of the supplies and a lovely card but no description of what their yarn is for... O.K. So it is a Little mean not to tell them but it sure will encourage them to get the yarn back to me in a timely manner if they want their present!


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Cute bunny!!! Is the chairity project a blanket? I love the colors!


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## hennalady (Nov 12, 2011)

saingxmom said:


> Cute bunny!!! Is the chairity project a blanket? I love the colors!


Yes, Teen Afghan for Linus


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## stubbynose (May 30, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


I feel exactly the same about stressing out over knitting people things for Christmas....I am knitting 1 scarf this year for a cousin of mine who is mentally challenged because I KNOW she will be so HAPPY to receive such a thoughtful gift. She loves anything handmade and she to loves to make things herself,Donna I know will truly appreciate the time and effort that was put into this scarf. Our families make such a huge deal out of her when we get together and this scarf will be the topic of conversation with many who see her this Christmas! Donna will not only love this extra amount of Love she gets but will truly love sharing her story of who made this for her. You should enjoy a few things for yourself now.....it makes knitting that more enjoyable when you know you get to keep it in the end and use it!! 
I agree you will feel so much better to give your items to charity such as hospitals or nursing homes where things will be used and forever greatful!! Some of the young folks today don't always appreciate the time and effort of home made things...not like they once did back in the earlier years!!!
I remember once a few years ago when my family used to exchange gifts we made it an all HOME MADE gift exchange!!! We choose the names the year before so we had plenty of time to think about and get the item done and it was the best Christmas ever!!!
We were all impressed with everything we got.....even from the ones who said they didn't think they could do anything!!
That was the Christmas my daughter recieved a beautiful home made Victorian doll house that every person in the family contributed too!! My brothers built it and painted it, my mother made all the curtains and bedding, and covered all the tiny furniture (which my 2 brothers crafted) with material . My sisters in law each made a carpet for the rooms out of needle point. There was nothing store bought for that house!! made with 100% Love!!
The house is still around and always will be!! 
So knit away for only those you want and don't feel bad at all for keeping things for yourself!! You deserve it!!


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## hennalady (Nov 12, 2011)

stubbynose said:


> danyxx2421 said:
> 
> 
> > I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> ...


We carried that tradition as well. What ever happened to that??? I enjoyed every handmade gift I ever got from anyone!


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## cattdages (Aug 3, 2011)

I keep telling people I knit and give out of love. If I start doing it for profit or on demand it just makes it work.


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## Weezieo77 (Feb 24, 2011)

I can't do it on demand either or I'll quit. It's too stressful & I knit for fun and relaxation.


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## occknitter (Aug 14, 2011)

yeh i feel the same way as you .rotten to the core we are BUUTT we enjoy what we do and also give enjoyment to those who receive our knitted and crochet goodies


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## Janina (May 2, 2011)

Dear Dany,
PLEASE DO NOT put pressure on yourself. You will hate knitting or crocheting if you are and you might do your knitting wrong. I have only knitted one thing for someone that has asked me do it but it was a real pleasure because it was not a big project, t was easy and, I had time to do it. So don't feel bad if you refuse, because some people just don't realize that knitting takes sometimes hours and hours to do a project. So please, don't stress, knitting is supposed to a nice pass time and it should relax your. Good luck! :lol: :thumbup: 
Janina


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## beverlyH (Oct 26, 2011)

I agree. There's no pressure when you making a gift for someone who will appreciate your talent. I also enjoy the look on there face when they think you thought so much to make something for them without them knowing that you cared about them. Keep knitting.


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## Jillpr (Mar 15, 2011)

I want you all to know that I have done a reality check since my first post this morning, and have now put away all socks until after Christmas. Then I will get them done when I have time. I have to do that now as the time constraints were driving me crazy as well as the attitude I get from my DSIL. Absolutly NO MORE demands for my knitting. Instead, I have decided to make myself a lavender neckwarmer with caron simply soft that doubles as a hood type head cover. Very pretty. I don't even feel guilty, just relieved. Dany enjoy life dear, knit what you want, and learn from those of us who learn the hard way. :-o


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## hennalady (Nov 12, 2011)

Good for you!!


Jillpr said:


> I want you all to know that I have done a reality check since my first post this morning, and have now put away all socks until after Christmas. Then I will get them done when I have time. I have to do that now as the time constraints were driving me crazy as well as the attitude I get from my DSIL. Absolutly NO MORE demands for my knitting. Instead, I have decided to make myself a lavender neckwarmer with caron simply soft that doubles as a hood type head cover. Very pretty. I don't even feel guilty, just relieved.


 :thumbup:


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## czechmate (Jun 17, 2011)

I sold a few things gifted a few and make myself one of everything FIRST,no stress to that only if I feel like it I have creativity and the love of knitting everyday,yeah for you whatever you want to do...


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## cbjlinda (May 25, 2011)

Another suggestion if you are going to knit for others is to make a designated gift box that you can work on things all year long and add to your box. before you know it you will have a full box and your hollidays will be far less stressfull" speaking of stressfull we waited untill the last minute to get out and shop because of church activites going on ect. I was amazed that within the first thirty minutes or less we had found everything we neededddd. we went to sams club and everything just fell into place. God I love it when things like that happen! Now I can actuallly relax for the rest of the hollidays.


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## Bonidale (Mar 26, 2011)

I agree. I'll go years without knitting stuff for friends and relatives. You are right about not putting pressure on yourself. I knit to please myself. Whatever pattern that grabs my attention at the moment. I give most of my knitting away to charity.


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## nannygoat (Jan 15, 2011)

Dannyx2421,
I am also from Turnersville, NJ. It is good to see someone on here that lives so close. This is a wonderful site, especially for help.


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## diane647 (Sep 25, 2011)

I'm so pleased that you expressed yourself so well. I think that you have made us feel validated. If you knit for pleasure and meditation you should not have to rush. I would much rather give an item that I made to someone who appreciates the effort and time I took to think of them. You are not alone in your thoughts.


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## Sledladyanne (Dec 15, 2011)

I feel exactly the same way! I love to make things for people but hate to be asked to do something. I guess then I feel pressure and it take some of the fun away. So glad it is not just me that feels that way!!


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## Los Lunas (Sep 29, 2011)

Hi Dany - No you are not mean!! I have been knitting for years and I learned to say no to requests - I simply tell people my time is valuable and I quote an inflated price. I found that, typically, people who have requests are not knitters themselves and have no idea of the time it takes or what it means for someone to commit to a project - they simply have no idea what they are asking. I cannot stress this enough, but you would be wise to politely decline everyone. Additionally, I was surprised at folks not only putting in requests, but they want to get real picky and pay me a ridiculously low dollar amount. If you commit to one person, others will follow and your attempt to comply will take the joy out of knitting. I strongly recommend that you attempt to do some research on what a hand knit sweater would cost in a department store. I guarantee you that you quoting a like price will discourage "requests". Your purpose for knitting should be for your pleasure. ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## Los Lunas (Sep 29, 2011)

Hi Dany - No you are not mean!! I have been knitting for years and I learned to say no to requests - I simply tell people my time is valuable and I quote an inflated price. I found that, typically, people who have requests are not knitters themselves and have no idea of the time it takes or what it means for someone to commit to a project - they simply have no idea what they are asking. I cannot stress this enough, but you would be wise to politely decline everyone. Additionally, I was surprised at folks not only putting in requests, but they want to get real picky and pay me a ridiculously low dollar amount. If you commit to one person, others will follow and your attempt to comply will take the joy out of knitting. I strongly recommend that you attempt to do some research on what a hand knit sweater would cost in a department store. I guarantee you that you quoting a like price will discourage "requests". Your purpose for knitting should be for your pleasure. ENJOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## joycevv (Oct 13, 2011)

Sometimes I knit scarves on the beach in the summer to give away as Christmas presents, otherwise it seems too late to begin anything after November. Pressure takes all the fun out of knitting. My son is going to get one beautiful sock in his stocking this year. He knows the other will come soon! I just realized that one sock has about 10,000 stitches using size 1 needles and fingering weight yarn!
Sometime after Christmas I want to finish the cardigan I started for myself, the first thing I've knitted for myself in ages.


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## carrottop71 (Jul 17, 2011)

I knit because I love it. If I want to knit someone something I do. If I want something for myself I do that. My boss saw me knitting a pair of socks and commented that they would make great hunting socks. I told him I would teach him how to knit. Ha Ha. Well I thought it over and since no one took up a collection for a xmas gift for him I decided to make the socks. I had some fisherman wool left over from a sweater I made for myself so I used that. I gave it to him yesterday and he was so surprised. He told my friend at work that I was just so nice. So it feels good to give and it also feels good to made for yourself.


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

Jillpr said:


> I was telling my SIL last month that I was making socks for myself, she quickly said that her daughter had a pair oh handmade socks and always talked about how warm and cozy they were and how their house is always drafty in winter and how there are so many of them in the house and that they all would love a pair of warm socks for Christmas. I have offered to teach this lady to knit and crochet many times and she always tells me that my work is so much prettier than hers and that I do handwork so much better than she, but that her "thing" is quilting, while mine is knit and crochet. I didn't know until then that our talents should only be limited to what someone else wants us to do. I love all types of crafting and always will. I am making the socks however, and so far have made 4 pair, with 4 more pair to go, but will never do this again. Doubt if i get them done for Christmas, but when they are finished I am making some for me! I have made the mistake of letting my DSIL (hint) me in to doing for her (again). Lookout 2012 It is the year that I decide what and who I do for! It isn't just you darlin' Just hang in there and for heaven's sake, let's all make a pact to do what pleases Us alone before we lose our love of knitting!


You will pardon my forwardness... but, your post made me feel angry. I don't know why because it's not that it happens to me, my situation is quite the opposite. Nevertheless, I was upset by your SIL's successful attempts to manipulate you. She is a USER. Don't let her "use you". Learn and use the word, "No", often, in her presence. Please excuse my frankness; I had to say it. I sincerely hope I've not offended you; because that is not my intention. And it's not just you... others do the same... But, I don't.

I knit socks for others... but, they receive them when they receive them.... I don't commit to a timeline and I never make items for Xmas... I knit the year around and they are happy to receive their socks, gloves or scarves or "whatever" whenever they get them.

I like hearing that you intend to knit for yourself in 2012. We'll be watching you... as you post the beauties you knit for yourself.

Be good to yourself, knit for yourself.


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## Damama (Oct 2, 2011)

I too like to knit, but not under have to get it done situation. IMHO the pressure takes the fun out of it. 
Happy Holidays to all , and happy relaxed crafting!


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## LaurieJanesplace (Aug 8, 2011)

silvercharms said:


> kmcnaught said:
> 
> 
> > Charge them for yarn and labor. These requests should die down
> ...


Brava to you.


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## PauletteB (Mar 10, 2011)

I have made a few Christmas gifts. Each year I usually try to knit some of our gifts. My oldes daughter usually puts in a request for what she wants. Like most of you I always keep a project going. As some point I break away and start Christmas gifts.


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## Lady of the Lake (Nov 10, 2011)

Hazel, I think you have hit on the perfect reply to unwanted requests! "I'm sorry, but I don't take knitting requests." You go girl! I love it! Penny


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

LaurieJanesplace said:


> silvercharms said:
> 
> 
> > kmcnaught said:
> ...


I second the "Brava to you" cheer.


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

Lady of the Lake said:


> Hazel, I think you have hit on the perfect reply to unwanted requests! "I'm sorry, but I don't take knitting requests." You go girl! I love it! Penny


I love it too.


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## nickerina (Jul 29, 2011)

Jillpr, I hope you told her you want a quilt in exchange for all those socks, after all that is "her thing"!!


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## joyceannellen (Oct 22, 2011)

Last year I decided to knit and felt different purses for my sisters, nieces and several friends. I was so stressed in November and December, knitting and working full time that I didn't touch my knitting for a couple of months afterwards. This year, I'm retired and making myself a sweater and magic loop socks. I have more time and for the first time knitting for myself and enjoying it. No guilt here!


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

joyceannellen said:


> Last year I decided to knit and felt different purses for my sisters, nieces and several friends. I was so stressed in November and December, knitting and working full time that I didn't touch my knitting for a couple of months afterwards. This year, I'm retired and making myself a sweater and magic loop socks. I have more time and for the first time knitting for myself and enjoying it. No guilt here!


Hooray for you!!


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

nickerina said:


> Jillpr, I hope you told her you want a quilt in exchange for all those socks, after all that is "her thing"!!


LOL... love your answer. Yeah, and tell her what colors and design you want.


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## somlady (Sep 20, 2011)

Don't feel guilty about meeting other people's expectations. It's wonderful that you are enjoying knitting and what you are doing. Just keep at it and have fun, it's supposed to be relaxing not stressful. You sound like a really caring person, not a meanie.


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## MindyG (Aug 6, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


I totally agree...I just started a few months ago and made myself a promise to keep it stress free...if it causes me stress, it's not fun anymore, so I know I won't want to continue, and I love it, so don't want to get down on myself. Making myself an afghan and it might take me a year, who knows, but I'm having fun with it and that's what counts.


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## MaryFlute (Dec 2, 2011)

No, you are not rotten or mean! It's your knitting, enjoy it and do what you want with it. I gave up knitting (and sewing) things for Christmas and such long ago, because I never had enough time to finish things, and it was stressful. Now I just knit whatever I want, whenever I want. I do give a lot of things away, because I enjoy doing that, and I certainly don't need everything for myself! If a good friend has a birthday, and I happen to have finished some little thing that I know they will like, I give it to them. I sometimes give people things as a way to say thank you for something. I knit because it is fun and relaxing and satisfying, and I like to try new patterns or play with colors and textures. So just find ways to enjoy your knitting. It is YOUR choice what to do with it. None of us needs to add any more stress to our lives.


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## BrightsideArt (Nov 15, 2011)

No, you're not in the wrong at all. I work as a part-time watercolor artist and used to get slammed with people wanting last minute Christmas gifts. I finally had to set a cut-off date of mid-November and stick to it. Anything taken beyond that point was NOT promised for delivery before Christmas. People are horrible about waiting until the last minute and then asking for something as if knitting or crocheting were as simple as snapping your fingers. Once the pleasure (of knitting) becomes a command performance, it's just another job.


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## Palenque1978 (Feb 16, 2011)

MindyG said:


> danyxx2421 said:
> 
> 
> > I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> ...


Dany, you are NOT rotten to the core!! What you are is smart. Keep up the good job, if taking care of you. And, keep on knitting and giving them away, if it's your pleasure.

Let's do as Mindy did... and make ourselves a promise to keep our knitting stress-free. I totally agree with that idea. If knitting isn't fun and/or relaxing for me... what's the point!!


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## rujam (Aug 19, 2011)

No dany, you're not, I'm in the same boat, I'm frantically trying to complete an order for Jean Greenhowe's Mother Christmas, I still have the arms to knit then I have to assemble her, I also want to make some washcloths for my friends, clean the house ready for Christmas and do the Christmas baking etc. No we're just normal!!! Merry Christmas from downunder, rujam


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## Jillpr (Mar 15, 2011)

Palenque1978 said:


> Jillpr said:
> 
> 
> > I was telling my SIL last month that I was making socks for myself, she quickly said that her daughter had a pair oh handmade socks and always talked about how warm and cozy they were and how their house is always drafty in winter and how there are so many of them in the house and that they all would love a pair of warm socks for Christmas. I have offered to teach this lady to knit and crochet many times and she always tells me that my work is so much prettier than hers and that I do handwork so much better than she, but that her "thing" is quilting, while mine is knit and crochet. I didn't know until then that our talents should only be limited to what someone else wants us to do. I love all types of crafting and always will. I am making the socks however, and so far have made 4 pair, with 4 more pair to go, but will never do this again. Doubt if i get them done for Christmas, but when they are finished I am making some for me! I have made the mistake of letting my DSIL (hint) me in to doing for her (again). Lookout 2012 It is the year that I decide what and who I do for! It isn't just you darlin' Just hang in there and for heaven's sake, let's all make a pact to do what pleases Us alone before we lose our love of knitting!
> ...


Thank-you for your encouragement Palenque, but please don't be angry anymore. My DSIL has spent years getting me to do things for her, and I did it all in the name of friendship and to keep peace in the family. I want to do what God would have me do, so turned the other cheek for too long. My fault. This situation as been handled now and she won't be taking advange of me any more. I just should have stood up for myself long ago. I am in no way offended by what you said. I thank- you for caring.

I do like that word whenever and intend to use it a lot in the future. I want to thank all of you for the encouragement I always find here. A great bunch of people here. It seems that we are great e-friends. LOL 
:thumbup: :thumbup: :lol:


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## saintxmom (Aug 1, 2011)

Great pix!


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## Roseymae (Nov 23, 2011)

I just want to tell all of you thaat you should begin a journal of what you have made & whom you have given it to. Fom where I am ssitting (79) I know how important this will be to you (& your heirs) in later years.

I was taught in the depression years & we just used whatever yarn we could find. Everything worked mostly because it had to. a


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## bettywald (Apr 6, 2011)

I am sooooooooooo proud of you way to think girl.


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## knitcrochetlover (Feb 1, 2011)

danyxx2421 said:


> I'm sorry maybe its just me but I have not knit anyone Christmas gifts this year. I mean it is my 1st Christmas knitting and I am absolutely obsessed with it. I keep very few things that I make, I love to give them away. I love faces when I give them something I know they will truly care about and enjoy. I have joined a knitting group and everyone wears things they have made. I am starting to feel bad because I haven't really kept anything and I would like to start doing so.
> 
> I love to post my pictures up and suddenly everyone is asking for things....Maybe I'm just mean but I refuse to put pressure on myself. I don't want to start stressing over something I love to do. I feel like if I am going to stress over completing things then I will eventually not want to knit anymore....so my thought is if I want to make people something I will but I WILL NOT put pressure on myself with a deadline! I have knit for charity as well as exchanges and that is completely different.
> 
> Anyone else feel this way or am I just rotten to the core?? lol!!!


You know it can be stress free if you take ALL YEAR to knit for family and friends along with your charity knitting. I also don't like pressure, like I had for my granddaughter's first birthday. (TOTALLY MY FAULT THO). And then she didn't like the item and still doesn't. (this was back in september). If I see a pattern that someone I know would like then I find time to make it for either birthday (have advance notice) or for holidays. No stress and plenty of time to make. Just a thought and I apology if it seems I am yelling, that is not my intent.


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## nannyberfa (Oct 9, 2011)

I never keep things either. But I found a new way to do this and not feel selfish- make things to enter in a fair-to see if you can win ribbons. And then its like the guilt goes away. So give it a try! lol


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## EleanorD39 (Nov 5, 2019)

[No message]


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